


Please Have Your Munny Ready

by Demontied



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Abusive Parents, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Camboy Sora, Chat Mod Riku, Deepthroating, Domestic Violence, Everyone Is An Adult, Exhibitionism, M/M, Mildly OOC, Miscommunication, Not Canon Compliant, Piercings, Porn Website/Stream, Porn With Plot, Sex Toys, Shibari, Strangers to Lovers, Very Inaccurate Description of How Streaming Works, Webcam/Video Chat Sex, slowburn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-29
Updated: 2020-08-26
Packaged: 2020-11-02 18:17:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 65,908
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20812406
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Demontied/pseuds/Demontied
Summary: Riku needed a part-time job to help pay for his apartment and college fees.  It wasn't the job he had expected, but it paid nicely and was easy enough: mod a porn website's cam shows.  He's seen it all and with his name notorious on the website, he can slack off and get actual work done.An empty Friday night brings something new to the table: a newbie streamer with a bright smile and an eagerness to please.





	1. Humbled

**Author's Note:**

> I've waited since February for someone to make a camshow/video chat fic but didn't find any so my goblin hands had to do the thing.
> 
> I should mention that this loosely is based on streaming, there's definitely some intentional and bad info such as Riku able to see donations and stuff. Obviously he wouldn't be able to but it has a reason for later.
> 
> I really got nothing to say for this. Camboy Sora is good.
> 
> @Vanplitwo on Twitter

Riku muted his headset and took a few swigs of his soda as the female on screen began her showboating, raising her hips and presumably moaning as loud as possible. For 'Rubbinlamp69' it was a common occurrence: men flocked to her stream (and some women too) for this exaggerated one-woman show. Seeing the chat begin their ritual explosion of slang, expletives, and eggplant emojis, Riku figured now was a good time to take a break, turning his attention to the nature documentary on his TV to the right of his computer screen.

He didn't want to be here. He never did, honestly, but a job was a job and he was  _ good  _ at his job. It was nothing he had gone looking for admittedly but they were the first job application to call him back, and within 24 hours of applying, he had been hired, trained, and started his adventures in being a moderator for streamers.

Porn streamers.

Amateur couples, camshow singles, sex toy demonstrators, and even bizarre things such as 'sexual health tarot readings—while topless' and strip poker where losers would remove clothing and write top donator's names across their breasts, ass, hips or the like. At first, he had considered just walking out of the job; he had been  _ extremely  _ out of his element and entirely uncomfortable. Riku was no stranger to porn by any means but having to moderate things that would have made him scroll by without a second thought or glance, something he had to sit through regardless of tastes, it wore on him at the beginning.

Until his first paycheck came.

For a college student needing a job after classes he could just melt into and ignore the rest of the world or even focus on his  _ own  _ hobbies  _ while  _ working? Well. He supposed the job wasn't all that bad. The more he watched and moderated, the more he grew a sort of fascination with it. Riku would log in to the website, be randomly assigned to a streamer, moderate the chat until they finished their show, and be assigned to the next.

He did this for about eight months. In a way, he sort of grew a bit popular; everyone recognized his username after a while and while he was a good mod, he was also fair. He memorized most of the streamer's rules and applied bans and timeouts as necessary, stopping hecklers and spammers alike. Fair, yet always consistently abiding by the rules.

That also meant he could be a bit more lenient. When his name popped up in chat, regulars knew to be on their best (yet raunchy) behavior, which meant Riku could take a snack break and get homework done, watch some TV, do a quick workout in his computer room or even nap (though this in itself was very rare and only for a few minutes or so). He'd go to school, come home, heat up dinner, throw open a stream and eat while the actor did their show.

When his friends asked how he made such big paychecks for a part-time job, Riku would just shrug it off and quickly tell them that he was 'working from his computer'. Not a lie, per se, but not a truth he was willing to quite admit yet. “Yeah, I watch camshows and mod the chat.” They'd never let him live it down. But considering Riku was pretty adept at computers, they never really pried too much outside of jokingly asking for a job application, to which Riku would just chuckle and hide his darkening face behind the rim of his Styrofoam coffee cup.

The documentary finished and a loud commercial blaring, Riku nudged down the volume and focused on his homework for the evening as 'Rubbinlamp69' did her cleanup and addressed the chat in a cool off session. Most streamers did this, cleaning themselves up and their beds or flat surface of choice, and then talking to the chat. Thanking them for their donations, views, comments and the like. Some ran surveys at the end asking what should be done next stream. Others asked what they could improve on.

By now, Riku needed only glance at the screen to see her doing her signature hair flip and twist, biting her lip and blinking upwards through mascara-caked eyelashes as she presumably thanked the chat. He rolled his eyes and began to say her ending stream slogan with a high lilt to his voice, twirling his pen as the stream shut off and a buffering circle rotated endlessly on the black screen.

He sighed and moved his mouse, double-clicking quickly to be re-assigned to the next stream. He wondered who he'd get tonight. It was a Friday, relatively late at about 11PM. Most of the good streamers had already gone or would go tomorrow night at an earlier time. He presumed some amateur couple or the middle of a solo show.

No stream found. Retry?

Odd. He blinked, clicked twice again and watched the circle buffer before returning his attention back to his homework and turning the volume back up on his headset. Another error code emerged moments later and he frowned, rapping his knuckles on the desk. Whatever. He should probably finish this homework anyways. Licking the edge of his thumb, he turned the pages of his textbook and started filling out the answers on the notebook under his right hand.

“A quiet Friday, huh?” he asked nobody but himself. That was fine too. Stifling a yawn with his left hand, he idly brushed it behind his scalp and tugged at the silver strands in a ponytail. Math wasn't his strong suit but he did every problem just fine and decided to call it a night. He didn't have classes until Monday so he could probably do the rest tomorrow. Instead, he brushed all that aside and reached for a different textbook and notebook and looked at his syllabus as he idly flipped through the TV channels. Another documentary about some sort of insect was fine, he just wanted the background noise.

No sooner had he started his assignment did the computer screen flicker. The black screen buffered cleanly, white screened, and buffered again. Cocking his head, Riku grabbed for his mouse to click to a different website but hesitated as a new stream popped up. He was the only one in chat, with the stream screen flickering the text ‘WaytoDawn is now modding'.

“Oh,” came a soft voice. “That was quick.”

Riku hesitated. From all he could see, the person—male--was leaning forward and adjusting the camera. Their mouth was parted a little to show relatively straight white teeth, unkempt brown hair sticking up in every which way, and collarbones on display, a shirt three sizes too large and pale blue hanging off one shoulder.

“Hang on, I—oops! That's not....wait, almost.....and there!”

Riku looked down at the stream title. 0 views. 1 viewer. 'First Time Here Hello!”

A newbie on a Friday was suicide. There'd be a straggler or two at the very least from other streams with more of an impact and they'd check this stream and probably leave, their fun, donations—and energy—spent elsewhere.

“”Poor kid,” Riku caught himself mumbling and turned his attention back to the homework. Easy paycheck. A new streamer with possibly an amount of viewers he could count on one hand meant Riku didn't have to work at all. Still....

Riku looked up with pale greens and saw the brunette leaning off over his bed. The boy was thin, sitting cross-legged in the gigantic shirt and what looked to be boxer briefs. There was the telltale rustling of a paper bag and the brunette started pulling boxes out and sliding them onto the white bedspread without looking. Riku unfortunately recognized a lot of those boxes being in this business. Lube, dildos, vibrators, baby wipes, and even some smaller boxes he could only assume to be cock rings and pocket vibes. Well well, color him impressed.

“Hello, welcome!' the boy said, leaning hard to face the other side of the bed and dragging something closer on the nightstand. A microphone. A good quality one at that. It didn't take his brain to connect those two dots: a mic close to the pillows for the streamer to talk to folks as they played, moan their names, or even make ASMR sounds. This was a newbie, sure, but they did their homework.

Riku's eyes glanced over the chat and sure enough, he recognized some names. There were a few anons, a few unregistered accounts who couldn't chat but could still donate, and some temporary accounts. He also recognized a mod's name but they quickly disappeared, swept away for a more popular stream.

“Hello, everyone!” the streamer—SleepingKeyhole--said as they sat back on the bed and placed their hands together between their legs. Sitting there, cross-legged in gigantic clothes that slipped right off that lithe frame and a bedhead of brunette hair, stared two beautiful, ocean eyes and a smile that he swore lit up the streamer's room a few notches. There was a loud click and Riku looked around the streamer's room before realizing it came from his. Riku looked around for the culprit and realized he dropped his pencil out of his hand. Resting his chin on his desk so as not to look away, he fumbled his hand around the floor until he hunted it down and pinched it with the tips of two fingers, quickly sitting upright.

“Yes, I'm new to streaming, thank you for having me!” the boy beamed, shirt sliding just a bit further off his shoulder to reveal a smattering of freckles along his skin. The streamer looked a little off to the center of the screen, reading the chat.

“Um, I'm going to give it a minute for people to join before we can begin. It'll be my first time doing a show, so I hope you all enjoy yourselves and let me know what I can do to get better.”

Riku huffed. The man was beautiful there was no doubt, but this website had tons of beautiful people. Looks didn't matter if folks weren't entertained. He'd be chewed up and spit out on his first day. Well, as much as he loved this job, he couldn't quite stomach being part of a firing squad and reached for his mouse to click away when those blue eyes locked to his.

“Thank you for modding this chat, WaytoDawn, I look forward to seeing you around and trust you to do a good job!” The streamer swiped a finger under his nose and grinned, all teeth and scrunched eyes and Riku hesitated with a finger on the mouse’s scroll wheel.

“Yeah,” he typed. “I'll do my best.”

“I have faith,” the streamer said, smile widening before he slapped his thighs once. “Okay! Let me unbox some of this stuff and we can get it started. Sound good? I'm a little nervous, but I'm excited, too.” he mumbled, mic picking it up clearly.

Spurtza:  _ Waytodawns in every stream u got its k _

“That so?” Sora said, attention turned to the screen and then back to the box he was currently fumbling with, gnawing at the tape with a pointy tooth.

Madfapper: _ yeah they mod almost every stream ur good _

“Good to know, thank you both!” Sora said, finally snapping the box open with too big of force and watching a brand new, flesh-colored dildo spring out and bounce on his thigh with a loud  **slap, ** landing on the blankets and making the brunette's head follow it in a delayed reaction.

“Oh! Hi there, little guy,” the streamer said and then laughed. Riku realized he wasn't breathing when his chest constricted and burned, hungering for air. The streamer was still laughing softly, brushing some fringe away from his face and looking at the dildo in his hands, currently bowing to the side a little. “Looks like someone else is eager to start!” SleepingKeyhole teased, giving the dildo a little wiggle for the camera. It looked absolutely massive in the man's hand, but Riku wasn't sure if the streamer had small hands or the toy was just that big. His throat failed to swallow saliva at the thought and he quickly shook it away as the streamer set the toy down.

The chat filled with a few lols, lmaos, and keysmashes and the streamer nodded a little, reaching for another box.

“I don't think I'll get to all these today, but I suppose I should show you what you can probably expect next week.”

Next week? Riku frowned and crossed his arms, leaning back in his chair. So he already had plans to come back? This newcomer certainly had gumption, he'd give him that. Still, it didn't really matter on his eagerness, it depended on the viewers themselves if he had a future. The brunette didn't seem to see the viewers as the sharks circling his boat and instead continued talking and unboxing the many things he had seemingly bought.

“--but this one is supposed to be a bestseller, so we'll see about that later.” he caught the brunette saying, placing down the last item on the bed. He neatly organized them in front of him side by side in a row, from the smallest vibrator to the largest dildo, a myriad of colors and patterns, some glinting light lamely from the ceiling light above the boy and the ring light illuminating the rest of the room.

“Okay, well...admittedly, I don't know how to start. I did prep myself before the stream so we should be clean but just in case, I brought these,” he said, pointing to a small box in front of him. A three-pack of condoms, neatly nestled next to he lube bottle. Half full, Riku noticed, the see-through container looking a little deflated and well-loved.

“Let's make this interesting!” the brunette said, leaning forward to smile into the camera, eyes looking directly into the screen. A blue so bright it almost looked fake, yet Riku couldn't point out the dull ring a contact lens would leave behind. And with eyelashes that thick and black caressing those soft cheeks, it only brought them out more, the glimmer in them almost blinding.  _ Definitely the prettiest boy on this site in a long time _ , Riku thought.

“I opened for private donations. First one to donate the highest amount gets to choose what toy I'll open the first stream with.” the streamer said, reaching their arms behind their head to stretch and groan before slumping back against the bed. From this angle, Riku watched the massive shirt lift up and reveal a smooth, flat stomach, the boxers a lot smaller than he expected and an obvious bulge of genitals resting right below the dip of the waistband.

The streamer was thin, there was no doubt about it, but he was also well-groomed, not a single telltale hair trail below his navel and nothing under his arms, either. He was either embracing the twink-like look or the by was incapable of growing hair anywhere. Riku didn't even see stubble, the streamer completely fresh and baby faced. That, in itself, was going to get him views if people stuck around. A part of Riku was curious if the boy shaved below the belt, but he'd find out soon enough: the donation notification sounded, but nothing showed up on screen.

Riku bit down on his tongue and clicked over to the donation panel, watching the numbers come in. Five munny, ten munny, the numbers kept climbing and mingling until one donation dinged. Fifty-five munny. The streamer announced time was up and clapped their hands together once.

“And we have a winner! If you could tell me what you want, Pumpking4, we can get started!'

At once, Riku felt his stomach drop in a cold dip. Why was he feeling like this over a streamer? It was nothing he hadn't unfortunately seen before, yet he was feeling a trembling, gnawing hunger scraping his insides and hollowing them out on display. He was grateful that he wasn't the one who had to show his face; he could feel the redness from it just by the sudden flush of heat in the room.

Still, he made sure to reach forward and close his blinds. College was a joke, anyways, and so was this job half the time. He supposed it had been a while since he'd taken care of himself, and admittedly, since most of the streamers were female, he never really found a  _ need  _ to take care of himself while he modded. It wasn't even for the fact that he was into men, it was just nothing he was interested in. Fake, orgasmic screaming, terribly bad acting as the women pretended to finish, or their cameras 'accidentally' shutting off when they were asked to do new things.

It wasn't that he disliked the female streamers but they had all found the same pattern that folks preferred and it just didn't feel unique. Fresh meat was hit or miss. But this...this was new. This streamer was eager to try and learn and get the chat involved. Color him impressed. He didn't see what the user had wrote, the message presumably whispered to the streamer, but the brunette simply hummed and ran fingers spider-like across all the toys before selecting the one that donator had chosen.

It wasn't anything special, a very pink flesh-toned dildo, average size and girth. But all the same, the streamer simply looked it up and down, ran a fist from his first hand up to the tip and twisted his wrist just so, enough for the camera to see it clearly and enough for Riku to practically feel it in his own hardness pressed tight in the confines of his jeans. Well. He supposed there'd be no harm in....indulging.

The streamer pushed the other toys back into the bag and then leaned back so he was pressed up against the headboard, grabbing some of the extra pillows and folding one into a tube, pressing it under the small of his back and raising his hips for the camera. From this angle, it was obvious to see the streamer was hard in their own underwear, cock twitching deliciously as the streamer adjusted the pillow and clenched their stomach muscles to hold themselves up.

Riku, as if guilty, looked around his apartment room before moving to unbutton his jeans slowly. God, he was fucking crazy doing this, but, at the very least he wasn't alone. How many people in the stream were already hard and in their hands or completely drenched through from fingers alone? The guilt still lingered, but the acrid taste left in his mouth from adrenalin and the complete relief from his pants loosening was too impossible to ignore. Fingers missing his zipper twice, he sighed in anger before yanking it down and feeling an appreciative twitch from his cock, now given more room despite the snug confines of the boxers still trapping it. He took a shuddering breath and slipped his boxers down a bit more, the hard jut of him slapping his stomach with a spring-loaded punch. He laughed through his nostrils but it wasn’t really funny. Was he this hard over some brunette boy giving the world a show?

It didn’t matter what he thought; the brunette was slowly undoing the buttons over that gigantic shirt (why bother, anyways, he could easily slip it off with no resistance) to the audience. Nimble fingers danced greedily over every button, and while it was clear to see the fingers shaking, the brunette just chuckled and worked to get them done.

“Technical difficulties.” he teased, but eventually he got it down to the last button and slipped it off. From the angle the boy was laying on his back from, it was difficult to see that body, but Riku did notice the boy was lithe as seen before. Small nipples, a delicate chest, and a silver crown necklace snugly resting in between his collarbones. Riku blinked. How did he miss something that shiny, anyways? His cock twitched against his stomach and he realized that, ah yes, it must have been everything  _ else  _ that was a distraction.

It didn’t stop Riku’s own dance along his body. He had only managed to free himself but he groaned, lifting his shirt carefully over pierced nipples and rolling it enough to tuck it beneath impressive arms and out of the way of anything else. He took another guilty glance around his apartment as if someone was suddenly going to be there and scold him before grabbing tenderly at his own twitching cock. His fingers worked slowly over the three rods embedded in the flesh, tantalizing over the Jacob’s Ladder before sinking a fist snugly around the base.

The streamer didn’t seem to notice and continued about their escapade, moving to raise their hips as high as they could go and sliding off those boxer briefs. Riku stared. How could he not? The boy was practically smooth, legs hairs nonexistent, only a tiny tuft right above the base of his cock, dark chestnut and trimmed enough that there were no curls. The streamer’s hand rested on the expanse of a hip bone and the other tossed the underwear somewhere to the floor where the bag was, forgotten in the showcase he was ready to demonstrate.

“Okay,” the streamer said quietly, breath shaking. “One minute.”

It took everything in Riku to not move, to not do more than squeeze himself once and feel the aggressive twist in his gut at the feeling. The brunette reached over for something on the nightstand with the light and then reached for the tiny lube bottle at the foot of the bed. There was the audible snap of the lube cap in the air and then silence, a small spurt of air escaping with the lube as the brunette slicked up the toy with a tight fist, even turning that into a show for those who were eager enough to watch.

“Are we ready?” the streamer asked. Riku saw words fill up the side of the chat but his eyes weren’t focusing on it, instead glancing over the streamer’s body, the slickness of his hand in that ring light. He wondered how that hand would feel, if it truly was as small and delicate as it looked? He didn’t have time to wonder as the boy leaned back and placed the hand--now supplied with the toy--in front of the camera. And those beautiful hips lifted once more.

Despite the angle, there wasn’t admittedly much to see, the streamer’s hand blocking it, but that didn’t stop Riku from catching himself leaning forward as if to get a closer look and upset when he saw nothing but shadow. Oh, but he didn’t need eyes when he had surround sound headphones, and the chill that ran down his back may as well have been a razor with how hard it sunk into his spine and dug divots through his flesh.

The streamer moaned. A soft, breathy little sound as the cold lube and tip of the toy touched the most sensitive area of his body. Riku swallowed hard and realized his hand had started moving, a slow, tender pace, enough to  _ feel  _ the bite of the pleasure currently engulfing every nerve. The streamer sucked in a breath with a shaking chest and began to swirl the toy lightly, ever so delicately around that twitching hole.

Another soft whimper and Riku groaned on his own, quickly reaching up with a free hand to mute his own mic, not that the streamer or anybody could hear it. He wasn’t going to take any chances. Riku took in his own breath and held it until it hurt, exhaling just as the streamer pressed the toy lightly against his entrance.

“A-Ahh…” the sound was so tender, so crisp Riku could practically hear it beside him, could pretend the air circulating above him from the fan was the streamer’s breath against his neck, tickling his hair across his shoulders. He was insane, he had to be. But his hand still stroked himself slowly as the streamer slowly worked the toy in. A little bit at a time, an agonizing pace. Pulling the toy out enough to the head and then sliding it back in enough for the camera to see it tugging at his hole, the pink stretch of skin slick and deliciously taut.

Riku shut his eyes briefly to try and get a hold of his thoughts, but all that went out the damn window when he heard the streamer start talking.

“Yes, I a-agree, it’s a very pretty color,” the streamer managed, shoulders growing a soft pink from the stares of people entering the stream, the brunette’s hand and hips moving, and the camera currently aiming at his asshole. Riku scoffed; there was no way any of the chatters were talking about the damn dildo. But, regardless, he took a quick glance at the chat to make sure people were behaving before diving back into his own ‘duties’.

The streamer cleared their throat and softly sunk their hips into the toy’s girth, the slicked silicone sliding in further and getting a stuttered moan from the brunette whose entire hand stopped moving for a brief second. The brunette’s chest was heaving but they peered down between their legs, a glint of a blue eye on display.

“Good, the camera’s in a good spot,” Riku heard him say and he could’ve choked then and there. Of course it was; everything was on display and almost perfectly. “That’s good, because I have a special setup I think you’ll all like to see.”

Riku’s hand stopped. Special setup? It wasn’t just the colorful array of toys and the hips currently grinding down on a too-fake-pink dildo? No, that’d be too  _ easy  _ after all. Instead, he let himself fall into the murky depths of those blue eyes before they slipped shut and the toy sunk back into that small frame to the hilt, getting a sharp hiss from the streamer and a groan from Riku in response.

“Sorry,” the streamer laughed, the sound hoarse and breathy. “That wasn’t supposed to happen just yet.” More viewers started typing, and Riku blinked hazily at the numbers. 19 viewers. Nothing too crazy but for a dead Friday night? Maybe he’d have to start counting on more than one hand. The streamer was nothing fantastical by any means, this sort of stuff was basic. Yet, there was something humbling about him, almost jovial. Addicting. Riku shook his head. No, it was nothing like that. It had just been a while since he last jerked off and this streamer was cute, nothing more, nothing less.

It didn’t help matters when he couldn’t pry his head away from the streamer, now currently lifting and raising their hips and pulling and pushing the toy in and out to the base with an erratic rhythm. It took only a split second to realize that Riku’s hand was following the rhythm of the streamer’s as if he were the one to bring the brunette to this breaking point. Riku swallowed hard at the thought. The streamer certainly tried their best to keep in touch with the chat, but at one point it became impossible and those hips started snapping at the camera in desperate little humps.

“S-Sorry,” the streamer whimpered, eyeing the camera quickly before squeezing their eyes shut. “It’s been a while, s-so--” Another snap of hips, the toy sinking a bit deep on the downswing, making the streamer gasp loudly and freeze. 

_ Pleasuredog111: streamer almost came lol _

_ _ _ KHuXmeDaddy: Whatever he’s cute tho _

_ Pleasuredog111: ya. How long will he go tbh? _

_ KHuXmeDaddy: Idk but I hope it’s a few rounds.  _

_ I’d donate for that blue toy. It matches his eyes. _

“Y-You think so?” Came the streamer’s voice, hips lowering down slowly and making a sticky glint of precum shine for the camera as he rose. “Thank you for saying s-so. It’s one of my f-f-favorites.” the streamer breathed, toy disappearing as he sunk down slowly, pressing the toy in deeper at the hilt and biting back a moan through thoroughly clamped shut lips, teeth pressing in hard enough to make the skin pale.

“I do,” Riku caught himself murmuring. The blue toy was in the bag but he had seen it prior and it was as bright and magnificent of a blue as the streamer’s eyes. What a show that would be, to see a toy as beautiful sliding into a body even more enticing. As if reading his mind, the streamer gave a soft, breathy laugh and brushed a handful of bangs out of his eyes with his free hand, trailing those fingers back down that smooth expanse of chest before idly rubbing a nipple in view for the camera and moaning in response.

“God,” Riku choked, squeezing his eyes shut and running a hand up his own chest. Much firmer than the streamer’s actual pecs in place where the streamer was flat. His thumb hooked around the green plastic ball of his piercing, tugging lightly at the pink nipple beneath with his forefinger. Again, he caught his rhythm matching the streamer’s. A hand stroking down as cock as the streamer sunk their hips down onto the toy, his fingers pinching and rolling that cool metal as the streamer worked their own nipple.

“‘S good,” the streamer whispered, the nightstand mic picking up that breathy little sound.

“I bet it is,” Riku replied, bangs tickling his cheek with every stroke, every tremble of his body. He felt like he was being hypnotized. Even when he tried to desperately break the rhythm and rush his orgasm out, he found he was unable to gather any freedom, stuck in the rhythm the puppetmaster on screen had for his strings pulled taut.  _ Dance for me. Step in line. Waltz the way I say. _

_ _ The streamer’s head tossed back and Riku could make out an open mouth heaving breaths through that chest, hips growing erratic once more. The moans sounded thoroughly broken now and everything in the room was echoing. Some of the pants Riku could make out but the rest were cut off by a pained-sound whimper, an aggressive moan that shook the streamer’s legs. Even without touching himself, the streamer was hard and angrily red, cock drooling out precum at a rate that may as well have been a left-on faucet.

“C’mon,” Riku whimpered under his own breath, fist tightening now with every stroke enough to  _ hurt  _ yet he wasn’t going to tip himself off that edge quite yet, not until this beautiful brunette in front of him was decimated under Riku’s ravenous eyes. His strokes had slowed enough to keep him in the game but he realized he was scratching at the armrest of his chair and that coil was tightening enough to snap in his belly. “C’mon, baby, you’re right there,” he groaned out.

The streamer’s feet ground out against the blankets on the bed and slipped, toes curling and trying to catch on anything but it was fruitless. Those hips became relentless, Riku wasn’t even sure the hand was moving now as he watched those hungry hips engulf the toy with a loud slap of skin to fist, the streamer’s cock bouncing obscenely on their belly. The brunette’s back arched and their head tossed to the side where the mic was.

“Cmon.”

“P-Please I’m--” the streamer whimpered, scrunching their eyes shut. Their fist had embedded tightly into the pillow as they cried out before reaching down to desperately tug at their own weeping dick, the cry raising a few octaves in response.

“Fuck, please, c’mon!” Riku hissed, fingers slick with his own precum. He didn’t realize he dropped his hand playing with his chest to instead grip tightly at the leather cushioning of the computer chair between his parted thighs, widening enough for him to fuck up into his hand with a deep groan. His palm pressed tight against the piercings and he hissed out a stuttered gasp, feeling the heat rising and pooling in his belly. He wasn’t gonna last.

“I-I’m...I c--a-ahnnnh!”

Riku gained clarity just in time to watch the streamer sink the toy in one last time with a hard fist and plummet of hips, spill across his belly in a thick wave, a heavy spurt and then a smaller one that raced the liquid down between his chest where it pooled.

“Fuck, I--fuck…!” Riku snarled and pumped one more time hard before spilling across his own chest. He was thankful for the shirt tucked beneath his arms; the white trail led upwards across his left pec and pooling in a sticky river between his abs and navel. He didn’t realize he was panting or his fist was covered with the remnants, his eyes aimed right back up to the streamer who was softly twitching and breathing heavily.

“Well,” he heard the voice, tired and breathy and forcing a soft laugh. “That was quick...I’m sorry.” The chat began to flood slowly with messages and Riku couldn’t be bothered to read them right now. He took one look down at the mess he had made and clicked his tongue, regretting not having anything to clean up with on hand and instead looking back at the screen when movement caught his eye.

The streamer was holding the toy and sliding it out slowly, slow enough that Riku could almost salivate at the sight. Warm lube slipped out of that tight hole and an audible pop was heard as the pink toy slid out, gaining a groan from the brunette and an equally soft hiss from Riku. The streamer sat up slowly and assessed the damage across their body before laughing again, a soft, tinkering little sound.

“This is flattering for some of you I hope?” he asked, looking at the slicked toy in his hand and then at his cum-streaked belly and chest. “Let me clean this up really fast.” he said. The brunette reached over into the bag and pulled out some baby wipes, cleaning their toy off first and then swiping down their chest, blue eyes roving over the expanse of their body as they cleaned.

“Well, unfortunately, this room is only er, rented for the evening so I can’t start another show I don’t think. However, I want to say thank you for giving me a chance and I can’t wait to see you all again next week!”

The brunette beamed again, cheeks still flushed and eyes glittering. He was back to sitting cross-legged and grinning at the camera, and if Riku could look beyond the streamer’s complete nakedness, he could practically imagine he had been friends with him forever. The streamer had something personable about their face, the way it lit the room and warmed his body to the core. A certain nagging thought scratched at Riku’s brain: what if the streamer doesn't come back?

Why would he care?

Why  _ did  _ he?

“I want to say thank you all for joining me for my first stream and I hope that I can come back next week. I had a lot of fun, and I hope you all did as well. Spreading the love is necessary these days, y’know? So, I hope I see you all again here next week.” The streamer gave a little smile and waved, white teeth in display and a warmth to his cheeks.

“Have a good night, folks, SleepingKeyhole out!”

The streamer leaned forward and with a final glance at his damp collarbones, the stream went to black. There were a few goodbyes in the chat, the usernames filtering out one by one until just Riku remained. He sat there for a long moment, staring at his dishevelled face in the black screen reflection and sighed. He brushed his bangs back with his clean hand and stood up to head to the bathroom.

\--------------------------

After a quick shower, Riku finished his homework with a clearer head and stuffed it into his backpack, cleaning up his soda and heading to bed. It didn’t take long for him to shimmy out of his clothes and slide into the blankets. He spent the next thirty minutes on his phone just scrolling through the websites and social media before his phone vibrated in his hand.

1 new email.

Riku blinked and tapped to his email application and waited for it to load before staring at the one email.  [ Noreply@Radiantgardens.com ](mailto:Noreply@Radiantgardens.com) . He blinked again and tapped it, expecting a complaint for someone that should’ve been banned in the stream while he was preoccupied but instead he swallowed hard against the sudden influx of adrenalin.

Message from SleepingKeyhole:

“Thank you for modding the stream, you did a good job and I hope you had fun! :D I hope you come back next week. Oh, and, if you could show me the ropes, I’d be grateful, I want to keep at this! Thank you again so much and good night. Or morning. Or afternoon!

Riku stared at the message for a long while before he laughed softly in disbelief and typed back: It would be my pleasure. Start an hour earlier, that’s when everybody is online.

No sooner had he hit send than a message came back two minutes later.

“Okay, will do! Thank you so much, WaytoDawn! I’ll see you an hour earlier same time, same place next week!”

Riku stared at the phone in disbelief before hitting the side button on his phone and stuffing it under his pillow which he promptly shoved his face into with a loud groan until his lungs fully deflated. He jerked off to a new streamer. The streamer was emailing him like it was an intern at a normal job.

“And yet,” he laughed softly, “I’ll be there. Same time, same place.” he rolled to his back and stared at the ceiling for a long moment before punching the empty side of his bed and bouncing from the force. “Today was a fluke. I’m not going to let it get to me. He’ll be chewed up and spit out and I can pretend this never happened.” he said, shutting his eyes with a sigh.

Same time, same place next week. His stomach warmed and clenched at the thought.


	2. Twitch Plays Sora

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I mean....Twitch really DOES play Sora.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "It's About Time' is given me so much irrational anger that I had to slap it in here. If you know what it's about, I'm so sorry. Also LOL.
> 
> Secondly, again, VERY grossly inaccurate depiction of streaming but hey, technology in a world with magic, let's go.
> 
> THIRDLY, "How did Sora tie his hands?" He has a roommate, but it's spoiler territory. 
> 
> (How did he start the stream with his hands tied? Some streams have timer settings but knowing Sora, he used his nose.)
> 
> ((Happy birthday Niku, I doubt you'll ever read this but I hope I can offer a meager crumb to appease you, wizard!))

School came and went in a blur and Riku slung his bag over his shoulder as the final class let out. Shaking the final droplets of his coffee in the Styrofoam cup he brought with him, he sighed and tossed it in the trash on the way out of the room, banking left and jogging down the steps before working his way through the crowds and out to the parking lot where he found his silver car and a mess of hair poking over the top.

Somehow, Roxas always managed to make it out before he did. He was convinced he had to jump out the third story window yet he never saw it and therefore had no proof.

Still, he walked over, grabbing the boy by the neck and yanking his head down in a playful greeting, immediately getting expletives tossed at him and watched as the younger male pouted and combed his nails through his hair to fix it.

“You always do that shit,” Roxas snapped, tussling his unruly blond hair back into messy little spikes and adjusting his gray hoodie's strings, one flung carelessly over his shoulder. Riku just answered with a grin.

“Don't touch my car, then,” he replied, getting his foot stepped on by Roxas who just rolled his eyes.

“Then _don't _offer a study party to me, lock me out, and then keep me waiting because _someone_ had to take the advanced classes. Which, by the way, won't matter when you decide to be an architect.”

“Uh huh. How's math class going?”

“Fuck you.”  
“Ooh, someone's feisty today.”

Roxas scoffed and made his way to the passenger seat, tugging on the car door handle repeatedly until it unlocked and shimmying inside, throwing his backpack between his legs on the floor. “Yeah, well, whatever. Pizza's on you.”

“It always is,” Riku said, shutting his door and working on his seatbelt before sticking the keys in the ignition. “Why don't you ever bring money, huh?”

“'Cause you're loaded,” Roxas replied with a shit-eating grin, reaching into the glove compartment for a pack of gum. Riku tried to snatch it out of his hands but Roxas had already slipped out the last piece and quickly stuffed it in his mouth, chewing noisily in victory.

“Prick,” Riku said, checking the rearview mirror and then leaning back over his seat to reverse, slowly ambling his way out of his spot and then waiting for a particularly slow pack of chatty students to cross the parking lot enough for him to slip through. Once on the main road, Roxas took the time to plug in his auxiliary cord and scroll through their music choices before picking something heavy with a lot of bass and drums.

“Ugh,” Riku rolled his eyes and turned left, making Roxas laugh and lean the seat back annoyingly—and presumably illegally-far, lying horizontal.

“What's the matter?” Roxas asked, cranking the volume enough to make the car start vibrating. “I thought this was your favorite song.”

“It _was, _back when it was about someone and before I was single again,” he said, reaching blindly to snatch at the phone, which Roxas kept away easily, chiding Riku for not paying attention to the road. “Why do you insist on playing our old music? You hated our band.”

“I still hate our band,” Roxas said with a nod. “But, it was freshman year and we had fun. I think you're just mad I still talk to Xion and you...are sad that _your_ song worked on her but got you dumped by--”

“Okay, okay, whatever. And look how far those ticket sales got us,” Riku said, finally relaxing into a soft laugh.

“Still enough to buy a pizza.”

“Gah, no, I think we need to make a new album for that. Say, how about _you _start writing music and _I _start eating pizza on your couch in my boxers after a night of getting drunk off my ass.”

“And yet, I still somehow am the life of the party and your living room once I wipe the puke off your floor.”

Riku snorted and pulled into the driveway slowly, giving Roxas a fresh tussle of his hair and slipping the car into park.

The pizza box lay open on the floor, two slices remaining and the cardboard positively soaked through with grease. Roxas sat in front of the couch with his head tipped back onto the cushion and his notebook flopped haphazardly onto the floor, pencil working in his mouth as he chewed, and Riku sat cross-legged, scrawling into a notebook with two other books open in front of him, one highlighted to all hell and the other one tacked up with purple and yellow sticky notes.

“I hate school,” Roxas murmured, pencil still in his mouth slurring his words.

“So drop out,” Riku replied, grabbing for his eraser and working his paper into a mess of shavings and stupid errors. Roxas just snorted and sighed.

“My dad would kill me. I couldn't. Besides, you need a degree to do what I wanna do and I already went two years in the hellhole.”

“Uh huh.” Riku turned a page. “So, why take anthropology if you're in it for game design?”

“I needed a stupid 'human and social study' class. If I have to look at one more skull and go 'hm' in class, I'm gonna lose it. They're all the same!”

Riku laughed and rubbed at an eye. “Yeah, well, it's better than calculus.”

“You like math.”  
“I _understand _math, doesn't mean I like it.”

“You seem eager to always do my homework for me.”

“Somehow, seeing your stupid face pass math class is a dose of serotonin. Besides, if you bunk out, I'm stuck in school alone, and I'd rather not be on that campus alone, you being a year behind me or not.”

Roxas' grin widened and he spun, placing his legs on the couch so his head was on the floor, looking upwards at Riku. “Just say you're afraid of girls.”

“I'm not--” A pause. Okay, Roxas _may _have had a point—to an extent. The school had more women than men so it was natural that eyes were on him, a plump wild hog with a pack of wolves closing in. By his car, by his locker, even a chair pushed too close for comfort in class. He assumed it was because of a 3.8 average but if that were the case, there were others that were around for tutelage. In the end, he chalked it up to him being single and hungry eyes on him at all times.

Roxas was lucky; he had Xion to fall back on, and when people realized he was taken, the vulture swarm disappeared and moved on to a fresher body.

That fresher body was unfortunately six-foot-two, muscular, and with long silver hair.

In short, he was doomed.

Roxas knew this, though, and would race to Riku's car every day so that the older male had an excuse to book it from the final classroom of the day, away from girls stopping him to ask questions or people 'just so happening' to linger by his locker. Their 'bro code' was strong and he was so thankful. He was more thankful for the cooler months enabling him to wear thicker, baggier clothes to hide with.

“Okay, fine,” he conceded. “I _may _have an irrational fear of being trampled to death in the stairwell.”

Roxas laughed hard and rolled himself off the couch to clamber back to a sitting position. “Careful, the cheerleaders might hear you.””

“Don't remind me.”

“Anyways,” Roxas closed the pizza box and nudged it away with a socked foot. “Where were you last weekend? You've never missed out on one of Ice's streams.”

Riku practically balked. Right. Ice normally streamed around 2am and he didn't show up, too enamored with his current stream before promptly going to bed. God, he really didn't want to have this talk with Roxas right now, not when he was knees deep in homework and probably as red as the pepperonis on the pizza they just ate.

“Work kept me late,” he supplemented instead, feeling the glare on him though Roxas didn't press.

“Work, huh.” Roxas replied, opting to just doodling on a free paper of his homework instead. “And what's his name?”

“What? What makes you think it's a guy?”

Roxas rolled his eyes and then his head, looking upwards at Riku and raising his eyebrows.

“....what?”

“Nothing.” Roxas said. Then, with a smirk: “You didn't see me in the chat, did you.”

At that, Riku had nothing. His nervousness manifested in the form of him scratching at the smaller hairs around the base of his neck, getting a gratified nod from Roxas.

“Baby's first show, huh?” Roxas said, and Riku felt the sudden dryness on his tongue. “And on a Friday too, that's basically suicide.”

“Yeah.” Riku sighed, closing his notebook. Like hell he'd be able to concentrate now. Another sigh, deeper. “I just—it wasn't anything planned. Cookie finished her show and I tried to go to the next but no new ones popped up, I thought it was a glitch. Was gonna knock out for the night but I gave it one last go and there he was.”

Roxas said nothing but just stared and it urged a third sigh from Riku, increasingly aware how crazy he sounded. Roxas wasn't stupid; he could pick up on a crush from his best friend of years, and Riku knew he'd keep bothering and pestering until Riku spoke.

“Look, he's just cute, okay? Nothing more than that. He had a handful of viewers and if he streams again, he'll probably crash and burn.”

“Most do,” Roxas admitted with a nod. Riku could never tell his friends what he did as a job; it had always been computer stuff and he didn't lie. Roxas was kind enough to butt in with 'my dad's company hired him' before using his 'dad's' company, DiZ, to basically make shit up about how Riku and him worked there together. Nobody usually pressed any further other than the usual 'wow, good luck!'. “That's the name of the game, though, a pretty face only gets you so far.”

Wasn't that the truth.

Riku opened his mouth to retort but the sudden 'vrrt vrrt' of his phone vibrating on the wooden floor got his attention and he grabbed it, tapping in his passcode before frowning.

“Uh.”

He must've said it aloud because Roxas just replied 'what?'

1 new email: Subject: WaytoDawn, I Got a Favor to Ask

“Uh,” he supplied again in a not-so-helpful answer before Roxas snatched the phone away in a movement so quick, Riku wasn't even sure he had time to protest. Roxas swiped and his eyes moved quickly in a reading motion before his eyebrows shot into his hairline. Without a word, he gave the phone back and rubbed at a pink cheek with his ringed hand.

“What?” Riku said, reading the email now opened in his hand.

“To Mod WaytoDawn:

Friday I am planning on something fun programmed just for the stream and would like you to assist me with my show. Friday, you will be asked to accept a program named 'Blue'. Please accept it. When you get to your mod page, you will find two columns of numbers from 0 to 9.

You'll get your other instructions during the stream. Thanks!

\---Sleepingkeyhole

“Uh.” Riku answered a third time though more out of confusion.

“The streamer wants you to _play _with him.” Roxas teased, reaching forward to poke Riku in a cheek, getting swat away with the phone in hand.

“That's—that's weird, I'm not gonna do it.”

“Yeah you are.”

“I'm not!”

_So, that was definitely a fucking lie, _Riku thinks, looking at his computer the upcoming Friday and staring at the mod console opened to the right of his screen where the chat usually was. Sure enough, after accepting the program, there were now two rows of columns with 0 to 9 in neat little squares. He just stared at them and gave one a little experimental click, watching the box turn blue and stay that way. He clicked it again and it went back to being white and unchecked. Weird.

His console chimed and he looked at the top of the chat to see a message.

_ SleepingKeyhole: Hey you made it!_

Riku paused and stared at the computer screen for a long while before going back to the chat menu.

_WaytoDawn: You asked me to. What's up?_

_SleepingKeyhole is typing . . ._

_ SleepingKeyhole: OK so here's the thing: I found this cool program and_

_ I tested it out. I want to know if you wouldn't mind uh...following some_

_ instructions for me tonight? It'll make the stream really fun~_

_ WaytoDawn: The boxes?_

_ SleepingKeyhole: You got it! I don't want to spoil the surprise but I_

_ think the stream will like it. I would do it myself but I won't have any_

_ free hands to click the boxes. So, I figured I'd ask a mod because they_

_ can--_

_ SleepingKeyhole: Chat limit, sorry. OK, so mods can use this program_

_ and so can the streamer so I'll need your help. I'll explain more in stream_

_ but I wanted to ask if it'd be okay first. If not, I could ask another mod._

Another mod? They were randomized, unless a mod directly clicked the stream once they knew about it. The only other person who knew was Roxas. Riku laughed and rubbed the side of his face; like hell he'd let him do whatever this streamer was asking.

_WaytoDawn: No, I got it. Midnight stream, right?_

_ SleepingKeyhole: You got it! I'm gonna clear the chat and get ready but before I go, I feel like I should tell you something. I know as mod you_

_ didn't really need to do anything last stream, but everyone seems to_

_ know you and like you. So...would it be possible to mod the next few_

_ streams? I'm not sure how the site works but..._

_ SleepingKeyhole: I feel like you put people at ease and I'm glad you're_

_ well-liked and trusted. I'd really like to see you around the stream more_

_ if you got time away from your schedule. I know it's all randomized but_

_ that confidence people have in you rubbed off on me._

_ SleepingKeyhole: Ok, well _I _rubbed off on me, but, that's sorta my job?_

_ But, anyways, yeah, didn't mean to get all sappy. I like familiarity I guess_

_ and having familiar faces/names would do me some good._

Riku brushed his hair with his free hand nervously. This streamer barely knew him, why was he just asking this? Was he trying to get points? If Riku stayed in a new streamer's chat enough that it no longer seemed like coincidence, people would stay in the chat also. It would keep viewers, and consequently donators. On top of that, it would give the stream a juicy boost for the days when things were slow when the bigger names dropped off for the night.

On the other hand, this streamer didn't seem all that evil. He doubted the streamer was thinking that far ahead, enough to use him for his own personal gain. He scratched at his chin and saw the ellipses of the streamer typing and disappearing repeatedly before stopping altogether.

_ WaytoDawn: I don't mind in the slightest. If I get pulled away, though,_

_ that's nothing I can help. It's just part of the job._

_ SleepingKeyhole: Of course! So that's a yes?_

_ WaytoDawn: Yeah, that's a yes._

_ SleepingKeyhole: :DDDD Thank you so much!!! Oh, before I forget._

_SleepingKeyhole has left the chat._

Bad connection? Riku stared at the chat window for a long time on the right side of the screen for about a minute before he realized the streamer probably wasn't coming back. He did say he had to get ready after all. Leaning back a little in his rickety computer chair, Riku looked at the lazy blades of the fan spinning for a long moment before the vibration of the phone rattled him to his senses.

Grabbing it, he saw he had a new email from a familiar username. He opened it.

1 new email: Subject: No Subject

I hit random on the stream name generator thingy and I feel like calling me Sleepy or Keyhole or something would be weird, so, between you and me, my name is Sora. Our little secret, ok? Let's have some fun tonight!

Sora.

The name rolled off his tongue. Probably another alias, he assumed, yet the name was as radiant as the streamer it belonged to, with eyes as blue as a summer sky. _Sora._ He chanced a glance at the clock on his taskbar and heaved a sigh, getting up to go reheat some dinner before the stream.

True to his word, Riku was there and waited for the stream to show it was live before clicking in. This time, rather than a brunette bumbling and stumbling to fix a mic, the screen now showed a 'STARTING SOON' drawing of some weird dog—or was it a cat?--moving slightly down and then up. He raised an eyebrow but said nothing, crossing his arms and squinting at the screen through salt-and-pepper eyelashes. This kid was really serious about this, wasn't he?

Needless to say, it didn't take too long for viewers to filter in slowly, Riku greeting the regulars he recognized and sitting back to wait like the rest of them. The chat began its usual ritual of talking, being lewd and crude, and spamming emotes but nothing Riku had to particularly deal with.

It wasn't until the screen flickered to black and then back to the splash image did he start to get antsy. His eyes kept roving over to the columns of numbers on the right, above the chat, and he realized his leg was bouncing when his calf started to get achy. It wasn't so much that he wanted to see the streamer—Sora—again, but it was more that he was curious what 'game' he was meant to play as a perverted ringmaster. Sora put a lot of faith in him despite not knowing anything about him and something about that stirred a feeling of pride and devotion in him. He wasn't one to fail when tasked with something important if he could help it.

His finger hovered over a square with a 'five' on the top row and he clicked it and unclicked it once out of boredom before resting his head on his chin. What was he doing with his life? Waiting for a streamer to start so he could watch the show and press buttons like the world's most horny game of whack-a-mole? He glanced at the small glass of red wine on his desk and took a few sips with a wince. At the very least, getting tipsy would make things interesting. He stifled a yawn with his palm just in time to watch the screen flicker to black again and then flick on into view.

His heart skipped a beat and then thumped rabbit-quick.

“Good morning, everyone!”

Riku's mouth went bone-dry. He wasn't sure what was spiking his heart rate more: the small, egg-shaped vibrator tied to the streamer's—no, his name was Sora, he had that information now—cock with a fucking _ribbon_, red and shiny and tightened into a _bow, _or the numbers on Riku's screen right by the chat, climbing from 1 to 9 in two horizontal rows. Sora sat on his knees, legs spread wide for the camera, and arms held behind his back. It was difficult to see from this angle but he could make out the same red color behind Sora's back—ribbon tying his arms snug to his spine. He was the equivalent of an unopened present wrapped especially for him and without a note, as if Santa himself figured the universe had already sent a sign in the form of this beautiful man on display and no postage would be necessary: the gift was for Riku alone.

Well, that and the whopping two hundred and seventy four people watching.

“Okay, everyone,” Sora beamed despite his quivering lips and blushing cheeks, “We're gonna play a game this stream. I want to get to know all of you and I hope you want to know me, too. Outside of just my body.” A few comments in the chat, mostly curious people, question mark spam, or a few people expressing laughter at the joke. Sora puffed some bangs out of his eyes and sat back comfortably on his knees.

“We're going to play twenty one—er, twenty—questions. Well, more like assumptions. Twenty assumptions! If you guys guess right, the vibrator will get stronger by one level. If you guess wrong, nothing will happen. If you guess so incredibly wrong that it's laughable, the vibration will go down a level. And, if someone gets banned or a timeout....the vibrator turns off for a minute.”

The chat instantly exploded into people asking questions to get the party started. Sora just laughed that tender giggle that shot warmth straight into Riku's lap and shook his head.

“Wait, I didn't finish explaining!' he laughed, as if it were the funniest joke in the world. “C'mon, guys, you gotta play the game right!”  
“With you already looking like this and you haven't even started yet? Unlikely,” Riku said, finger itching right above the mouse, pointing at the number 1. He was the only one who saw this; the email said he would be. How he longed to abuse his mod powers to click that 1, to see Sora instantly shut up mid sentence and huff, eyes wide and pupils engorged on the sudden onslaught of lust? Riku could do it, could click these buttons in a frenzied dance and watch Sora helplessly sway to the beat of his own making. His fingertip pressed down a little harder.

“Furthermore,” Sora continued, back to smiling at the screen directly, “Every time someone donates fifty munny or higher, they can whisper my lovely assistant, WaytoDawn,” Sora winked at the screen and shimmied a bit in place to get comfortable again. Riku swallowed hard twice before his brain decided now would be a good time to make some saliva to help with that. “And can choose what level to set the toy to, no matter how high or low it's currently set to. Since it's a whisper, it'll be a surprise to everybody. Sound good?”

He watched the chat slowly fill with people commenting their variations of yes and once he deemed it good enough, Sora nodded, sitting up higher on his knees and watching his own cock bob with excitement. He let out a soft breath and smiled back at the screen. “Okay, everyone, let's play!”

_LandofDParture: Assumption? You have a sis or bro._

Sora read the message out loud and slumped his shoulders, lifting his head in a pout. If he was able to get any more beautiful, Riku didn't know until now. Sora's pout turned into a groan and then a loud sigh, his pout turning into a crooked grin.

“You're right. I have a brother.” he said, nodding at the screen. “So, you know what that means.” Riku swallowed hard and looked at the 1, currently highlighted by his mouse's cursor. He clicked it.

“Nnh!” At once, Sora's hips bucked once and a low hum was heard through the stream.

“God,” Riku breathed. The vibration was so low and yet he could make out the ribbon quivering along Sora's stomach, now twitching with its increasing breaths. _God..._

The obvious game set, the chat started slow before turning into a metric clusterfuck of comments, emojis, howling, and expletives. Riku took everything he had to snap out of it and focus on the chat, on his instructions, halfway concerned he'd get a text from Roxas throughout the 'game' with encouragement, teasing, and full-on degradation.

Still, it didn't stop him from feeling hot below the collar and glancing along the expanse of lightly tanned skin growing slick under the eyes of hundreds and the tremors currently sieging a gentle war on Sora's dick.

It took Riku a moment to snap back to reality when he saw the chat moving quickly. Sora's eyes were lidded over with lust but they could be seen moving as he read the chat from whatever he was using in front of him. A large screen, maybe? A projector? He wasn't sure. Regardless, he seemingly picked at random and read the assumption out loud.

“You have pets.” A soft, shaky laugh. “Right again. They're n-not here with me, though. I have a pet dog and a stray duck that stays in my mom's yard.” Riku watched Sora's chest puff a little as he inhaled and he laughed again, smiling at the camera. “Round two.” Sora breathed. Riku gnawed on his bottom lip and slowly moved his mouse over over the two, hovering. He must've sat there a bit too long because he heard a third, soft laugh ending in a tender groan. “Looks like someone's playing at home, huh?”

Called out, Riku clicked harder than he intended—in surprise or anger he wasn't sure which--, his index finger unreasonably injured in the process, and watched Sora buck upwards with enough of a jolt that his spine went ramrod straight.

“Da-damn it...” he heard through his headset, Sora's cheeks fully flushed pink and scooting down his neck and shoulders, tiny freckles fully on display. Riku's heart thudded and his chest and he felt the dryness in his throat returning full swing, reaching for his wine glass and downing a large sip with a grimace. Sora shimmied a bit in place and started talking to the chat but his brain wasn't processing the words, his brain being rubbed softly with cotton and a soft buzz. His remaining brain cells on patrol decided to do him a small mercy and think, connecting the dots of what was unfolding in front of his very eyes.

Sora was using bluetooth.

Riku was controlling the 'dial'.

He was losing it.

“If the vibrator only goes up to nnh...only goes up to nine, why is there twenty questions?” Sora laughed and the result made him tremble a bit. “That's a secret. I guess, you'll just have to--”

_Ding!_

Riku looked around at his phone and then at the computer screen. Sora also seemed alert. Oh. A donation. Right, he had to check. Sure enough, hidden under the mod panel was a recent donation and a message attached, hidden from the stream: 50 Munny from xRapidthrusterx: 5!!!

“What's it gonna be?” Sora mused, eyes glossy as the hum of the vibrator laced his words. From the filler light somewhere in front of him, it only made the slick of sweat on his skin visible, Riku's eyes trailing lower and focusing on the bright white sheen of something on that red cock's tip.

_Oh, fuck this._

Riku quickly unzipped his pants enough to get some freedom from the tight confines and placed his left hand over the hardness curved against his thigh. His mouse hovered over the five, and right as he clicked, he _squeezed. _The chain of events that followed were almost enough to tip him over.

Sora muffled a scream from the sudden jump in vibration strength, the little egg-shape tied to his slick dick now growling in its ministrations. Sora's head bowed as he bucked a little into the air for any sort of friction, rolling his hips as if grinding against something. Riku could see his chest heaving, the ribbons tied around his arms stretching and flexing as Sora tried to clench his fists—or more presumably to try and stroke himself but wasn't allowed. Poor thing.

“F-faa—tha'ss jus—fuck.” Sora whimpered in a drunken slur, trying to collect himself and work back to a kneeling position but he looked boneless and weak, even his spiky hair seemingly _drooping. _His dick was putting the red ribbon to utter _shame_, a scarlet so red it was obvious he wasn't going to last long. Riku eyed the columns warily, watched the chat go wild. It became a guessing game to assume what level the donator had selected and though none could agree, they all guess it was higher than 6.

“You wish,” Riku heard himself speaking out loud, palm still squeezing the length of himself as he watched Sora speaking. After seven wrong assumptions in a row, Riku realized they'd be here a while and decided that there'd be no shame in having his own fun, slipping himself out of his briefs and quickly downing the rest of his wine. It didn't take long for the warm buzz to hit, an idle palm stroking lightly as he watched the streamer go about their game. His thumb idly worked at the head of his cock, and did nothing to calm the heat pooling in his belly or down his legs.

“Let's have some fun, indeed,” Riku echoed Sora's words from earlier and he laughed softly. Sora may be a newbie to streaming but he wasn't no average run-of-the-mill camboy. Two weeks in a row Riku found himself at the helm of the controls and in a horny daze, and despite all his attempts to blame it on college stressing him out, he had to admit to himself that maybe, just _maybe, _this brunette he could lift with one arm was affecting him.

Another ding, and Riku glanced over, stroking a little faster.

50 munny from PowerofWanking: 0

Turn it off? With a grin, Riku did as told, watching Sora practically slump again in relief. Sora was breathing heavily, leaning over to rest his head on the pillow he was kneeling on for a minute to catch his breath before adjusting to a kneeling position again, and with the motion, a thick strand of sticky precum followed him, leaving a beautiful ribbon of opalescent shimmer.

“There _is_ some mercy in here,” Sora said with a ragged laugh, licking a slight stripe of drool from the edge of his mouth. He looked thoroughly wrecked and yet his sense of humor remained, not quite meeting his blissed-out eyes, the bright blue dark with how wide his pupils were beneath thick eyelashes. He was positively trembling now and everything in Riku tried to keep his thoughts as pure as he could. If Sora looked this absolutely fucked out with just a _vibrator_ imagine how he'd look stuffed full by an actual body pumping into him from behind?

The thought alone made his dick ache and he gave it a forceful squeeze as he worked his fist up, snagging on his piercings just enough to get a _hiss _from the pleasure-pain lacing up his spine as a result. A donation came in quickly and the vibrator bounced up to a 4, making Sora yelp and start grinding against the air once more in a rhythmic, erotic dance. Riku may as well be watching a snake charmer, the way Sora's helps rolled and undulated against a song only he could hear, hips once reserved and unmoving now free to move among the eyes of dozens.

He couldn't help but run his hand quicker over himself to match the pace, watching the glistening drool trickling down Sora''s chin again, a thin rush of precum slicking up the ribbon and the toy.

“C-Close,” Sora whimpered, squeezing his eyes shut briefly and opening them to read a message. Sora hummed and gave a weak nod. Riku hadn't even heard the question, but he knew that someone assumed right. He clicked the five. Sora bit his lip and barked jerkily against the air before moaning high enough to crack his voice. Riku was panting, his own computer chair creaking as he thrust into his own hand at an increasing pace. He wasn't even sure if he was sweating or growing slick but it didn't matter, not when he couldn't look away.

His breaths were ragged and he had to keep tossing his bangs from his vision. He wasn't even sure when he started panting from an open mouth. A thin layer of sweat made his shirt stick uncomfortably to his chest but he didn't have time to take it off and lose this rhythm, this connection. He didn't realize how long he was stroking himself for but the burn was growing, the coil in his chest steadily unwinding and gnawing into his chest, into his very lungs. The desperation, the eager anticipation making him crumble.

“Nngh...how long are you gonna last?” Riku murmured, watching Sora practically squirming now, lowering himself down and squirming back up, his own private little ghost fuck happening under the eyes of many. Adrenaline was coursing through his veins enough to make his legs quiver, the room was hot as hell and his shirt situation wasn't getting any easier, and to top it off he was on the edge himself and getting antsy. He could easily let go, himself, but it was more fun for some 'audience participation'--more than he already was.

He let go of the entire pressure on cock, enough to keep the strokes gradual but not as appealing. Sora was speaking again but Riku, in his haze, only heard one thing right as his eyes looked towards the chat.

_The CumGuardian14: Youre a virgin_

Sora's head lolled a little on his shoulder, and through the wet spikes of his bangs, he gave a weak little smile.

“I am.”

“_Fuck_, I--”

It happened in an instant. His hand reached for the mouse about to bump that 4 to a 5, but in his trembling need, he misclicked, his hand dropping the cursor to the second column. He went to click and his arm jerked, the five suddenly becoming a nine.

_Fuck._

Sora honest-to-god _screamed._

His head tipped back until it was skyward and his mouth hung wide open after the scream ripped from his lungs. He could only jerk his hips once in a magnificent stutter before moaning weakly in the back of his throat, coating the pillow in a thick surge of cum.

“Sss--”

“God,” Riku breathed, hand a frantic pace, watching Sora squirm against the loud snarl of the vibrator until his knees gave out. Riku hadn't been told he could turn it off on a whim so he watched, transfixed, as Sora leaned back against the mattress and _writhed_, a desperate dance of feet digging into the sticky mattress and arms folded behind his back entangled in a scarlet ribbon. Sora was whining, whimpering, crying out keenly and babbling but the mic couldn't pick up his words clearly until he heard the broken cry.

“Sss-nnh! S-stop..! Stop!” Sora's back arched hard and he gripped the mattress with his toes but all it did was make Riku cross that edge.

Visible only from this angle was a vibrator, wedged snugly into Sora's pert ass.

And Riku had turned it on to its highest setting by mistake.

“God, fuck, I—_Sora!”_

If Riku was still alive, he wasn't sure. The world was still coming into view around him in a slow daze. He blinked at the computer screen and was pleased to see he had managed to hit the 0 on the bottom setting. The other vibrator was set to 0 though he was positive he hadn't done that. Sora was currently still lying on his back and breathing heavily up at his ceiling. His bangs were clinging to his face and Riku couldn't see his eyes, but Sora's mouth was still hanging open and a small divot of cum was resting in his navel, his cock thick and lazy against his belly.

“Well,” Sora breathed, his voice thoroughly hoarse and dry. “It's about time.” He worked his way to a sitting position with his legs crossed and smiled up at the stream in a sleepy sort of dopey grin. “That could've gone better.” he said, reading the chat and then surveying his bed for the mess he made. Most of it seemed to have landed on his white pillow, though Riku couldn't see it and had to base it off of Sora's reaction as he nudged it away with a foot.

“I'd been meaning to do laundry today,” he joked before working his arms and eventually squirming his way from his bonds and he disentangled his flaccid cock from the confines, slipping off the vibrator. “Man, I was doing so good at keeping a secret, too.”

Sora pouted and Riku groaned in response. Was that directed at him? Shit.

Still. He glanced down at the mess he had made himself, thankfully only caught on his pajama bottoms, fist, and a bit of his shirt. Unfortunately, now he had to do laundry too. He knew he should've taken his shirt off, the sudden chill of the room kissing along his overheated skin. He exhaled heavily and turned his attention back to the stream to see Sora had more or less calmed down and was going from red to pink on his face, brushing his damp bangs from his cheeks.

“Well. I'll try my best next time! I'm sorry for the quick stream, guys, but I gotta get going soon. I'll see you guys next week, same time and place. Have a good night!”

He leaned forward and with a free hand extended the stream cut off.

Riku stared for a long while and watched as the chat slowly filtered out before sighing and getting up to clean himself off, returning after a quick shower and in a new pair of pajama bottoms, listening to the washing machine rattle. Twice, now. Twice he'd gotten off to the sound of Sora, to the view of him lying on a bed and writhing with such a clear picture Riku may as well have been there.

He grabbed a cup of water and started drinking it. He doubted a glass of wine would do anything to him but the cold gave him something to focus on that wasn't sapphire eyes darkened with lust, the way Sora had screamed as he came, the blush that trickled down his shoulders as the vibrator kicked on.

He should apologize for nudging the wrong button. He'd been given explicit instructions and fucked them up easily. He had the email, he could. Instead, he decided to get something quick to eat in the form of instant noodles and finished up his homework while he ate and calmed down from today's adventure.

It wasn't until he was lying in bed at 3 in the morning unable to sleep did he remember to email Sora, and reaching over for his phone, he opened his email app and paused.

Sora had sent him one. Probably to ask him to not do that next time.

He opened the email and his heart dipped.

1 new email: Subject: No Subject

You know, I didn't expect you to be the eager type. Starting up the stream, you clicked a number, didn't you? I had to delay the stream a little bit and get my bearings together.

But that's not why I emailed you. Did me being a virgin turn you on that much? I could understand a little jump from 4 to 5 as a misclick but it seemed a little too....intentional. I'm flattered tbh! In fact, I got you a little something as thanks. I hope it's ok!

Riku glanced at the email until he saw 'attachment'. There were two of them. One was an image of Sora from the collarbones down with a worm's eye view, beautifully tied cock on display without the vibrator. Riku's heart skipped a beat and he jolted upright in bed to stare at the phone in his hands.

“No way.” he breathed, rubbing his tired eyes and checking the other attachment. A video. He squeezed his eyes shut. He shouldn't open it. He should just delete the damn thing, roll over, and get to bed like he originally planned. His finger lingered over the attachment.

Licking his dry lips, he opened it. There was a black screen at first until a hand moved away from the camera. Sora sat on his knees and blushed, brushing some bangs from his face.

“I really want to thank you for today, WaytoDawn, I had a lotta fun on the stream! You kept things interesting and that's all I wanted. I um, left a little something for you in an email as thanks, I—I hope it's not weird or anything, I just....I mean, I guess if you mod streams for a living this probably seems really vanilla, huh?”

Sora scratched his head and returned his smile to the screen with a little more confidence.

“I guess what I'm trying to say is thank you.”

The camera cut out and the video ended. Riku stared at the black screen for a long time before moving back to his email and typing.

“No need to thank me, Sora, I'm glad I could help and I'm sorry for the earlier accident. It won't happen again. I think we can skip the formalities. My name is Riku. Have a good night.”

He turned off his phone screen and curled up on his side. He didn't realize how tired he felt until the lead in his limbs worked roughly into his muscles and his eyes itched. His comfort didn't last long, however, as his phone vibrated. He squinted against the bright light with his night vision and frowned, looking at the push notification on screen. 1 new email.

Riku opened it and almost dropped the phone.

“Riku. I like it! I'd like to see you, sometime...if that’s ok! Pic for pic? Do people still do that?”

God, Sora wanted a picture of..._him?_

Unfortunately—or maybe _fortunately—_the thought shot a surge straight to his dick and he groaned, rubbing his tired eyes. He guessed it was fair. He hadn't taken a nude since he was still a teenager and even then, that was years ago. Still, he licked his lips and felt the nervous quiver in his belly, turning on his ceiling light and glancing at the mirror on his vanity off to the side. He'd have to zoom in but from here it was doable.

Feeling a little embarrassed, Riku sighed, lifted his shirt to his mouth and held it with his teeth, using his free hand to yank down the waistband of his pants. His pale skin was on display, the large scar marring his side garish in comparison. Riku frowned and twisted his body a little, hoping the shadow of the room and his body would cover it mostly from view. Every crevice of his abs were soft in the light, his nipple rings glinting from the overhead shine. Riku's eyes worked down the mirror and he followed the trail of dark grey hairs that ended in the base of his cock, now erect and on display, and eagerly reddened.

_Just for Sora, _his brain supplied, and he frowned, snapping the picture and zooming in to edit out the majority of his room. He sent the attachment into the email and froze above the send button. What was he doing? He didn't know Sora and yet he was taking nudes for him? Well, he supposed...one couldn't hurt.

He took a breath and hit send.


	3. In the Flesh

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes, things are too good to be true. A chance meeting of fate or something else entirely? (Sora POV/Riku POV swap)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all, sorry for the delays! Holidays are right around the corner and my motivation and free time has tanked. Thankfully, I managed to get this out on time for American Thanksgiving. Eat up!
> 
> Secondly, just a quick warning, this chapter does deal with some domestic issues such as alcoholism, physical abuse, and the like. Tags have been added.
> 
> Thirdly, thank you to my friend for Beta-ing, you make my awful, typo-riddled writing worthwhile!

Sora didn't stream the next Friday. It wasn't as if he didn't want to, but some real life things came up, and he found himself distracted. A family dinner was the last thing he wanted to do, especially knowing how his stepfather could and would be. His mother was fine; she was a sweetheart, truly. But the issue always lied with his stepfather, either too drunk to make things pleasant or spewing hate like it was going out of style. At the very least, Sora had the solace of his brother who he hadn't seen in a few months but although they didn't get along very well, it was better than the smell of whiskey in his face as his stepfather laughed and snarled commentary across the table, saliva streaking into the remnants of his mashed potatoes. He didn't really have an appetite, so this being an excuse to not finish his food was perfect, especially seeing his mother's crestfallen face as she sat quietly and listened to the arguments occurring. It wasn't as if he wanted to let this happen, but she knew better than to speak up.

It was halfway through dessert and his brother was about to throw hands when the older twin would sigh, shove away from the table with an aggressive huff, and go outside to smoke. Sora hesitated but followed and slid the balcony door shut behind him as quietly as he could manage. One less sound to poke the bear in the living room, currently arguing something to their mother, an expletive the last thing he heard as the door snapped shut.

“”You smoke, Vani?” he asked, watching his brother fumble into his coat pocket.

“Yup,” the brother replied, unwrapping a lollipop and jamming it into his mouth, the white stick enough of an illusion to fool their stepfather. “Just needed some space.” Vanitas sat down on the bench swing and pat the free spot next to him. Sora, in his messy glory, fumbled over and sat down, falling a bit harder than he intended as the swing moved forward to catch him.

“Ow.”

“Typical,” Vanitas said, pocketing his hands and glancing over the railing at the sandy beach below, currently dyed in purples and pinks from the setting sun. “Why did you come?”

“Why did  _ you _ ?”

A loud pop as Vanitas took out the lollipop, “Asked you first, asshole.”

Sora snorted through his nose and hiked his legs up to curl underneath him, leaning on his side of the armrest for balance. “I...I dunno. It's been a while, wanted to see mom. Missed having real mashed potatoes and not instant ones.”

Vanitas' turn to laugh, reaching into his pocket again and this time for eye drops, parking his foot and the swing and dropping one in each eye carefully. “How did that go? Was it worth seeing pop too?”

“Hell no,” Sora scoffed, curling into himself a little deeper. “I wish she'd leave him but...”

“She can't afford the bills without him,” Vanitas finished, blinking a few times and pocketing the eye drops. The salty beach air had to be drying out his contacts.

“Yeah. New color?” Sora asked. They were twins, yet his brother had dyed his hair black and wore colored contacts, cycling through the colors often. He hated the blue of them, but loved the compliments he got for the other choices. Then again, being 'normal' was never Vanitas' choice. He loved being the oddball, the 'black sheep', figuratively and literally, shaggy black hair ruffling in the breeze to prove a point.

“Gold, yeah.” Vanitas replaced his lollipop and ran his fingers through his choppy hair in an attempt to brush his bangs back. A futile effort, especially on a swing, but one Sora applauded nonetheless. “Should've went with red, it probably would've pissed the old man off more than these. Honestly, anything to get him going is fine in my book.”

Sora snorts again and just sits in silence on the swing. The air's grown cold but the beach still smells nice, tangy and salty but home. He truly does loving coming back home to visit and see his mother but the visits have become too far and few and she's unable to visit because his stepfather would never allow her to leave the house, accusations of cheating or sneaking out snarled in her face that she'd deny. They've both tried it, even paying for her ticket, but she would politely decline, muffled yelling on the other end.

“So,” Vanitas took out his lollipop and fished around in his pocket for another one to toss to Sora. “All I got his grape left, sorry.”

“That's fine, thanks.” Sora hurriedly rushed to unwrap it, enjoying the sweetness on his tongue, better than the bile rising in his throat. Vani shrugged and replaced his own lollipop, adjusting his coat a little closer to his body, the screech of leather underneath his fingertips almost drowned out by a seagull overhead.

“So,” Vani started again, “You gonna tell me how you got here?”

“The train.” Sora replies like it was the simplest question to answer in the world. Vani side eyed him and scoffed.

“You know what I mean. Last I checked, I had to buy groceries for you on more than one occasion, not to mention pay for your heating bills  _ and  _ your rent. And you can suddenly afford a 200 munny ticket?”

“I--”

“You still deliver pizzas, right?”

“Well, not exactly...um, I do some package deliveries around town, too. Elderly people need their medicines and can't really walk that far, so I go drop them off.”

“Hm.” Vani switched his lollipop to the other side of his mouth with his tongue and gave a halfhearted shrug. “You're a bad liar. Always have been.”

Sora spun quickly, almost toppling off the swing. “That's not true! I didn't lie!”

“So then what?” Vanitas asked, narrowing his eyes against the sun. “Sugar daddy? Donations? Ooh, wait, don't tell me....” Vani scoured him up and down before the redness in Sora's face gave him away. The playful smugness slipped off of Vani's face as soon as Sora's turned away guiltily.

“Don't tell anybody, okay?”

“....okay?”

Sora inhaled and held it. Maybe he could just get away with the bare minimum. Knowing his brother, that wasn't going to happen, but it beat the alternative. Sora glanced backwards at the house, at his mother sadly cleaning off the table while their stepfather sat in a reclining chair and held a glass of some amber liquid tightly, skin flashing different colors. Watching TV as always. Sora exhaled.

“I...I may have tried something new.”

Vanitas blinked catlike and slow but an answer didn't come. He opted to raise an eyebrow and it just made Sora jittery. OK, so the bare minimum wasn't going to cut it. Picking lightly at his jeans, Sora frowned and exhaled.

“I, um....do shows. O-Online.”

“Okay?”

“N....naked?”

Vanitas just stared for a long while, enough for Sora to wonder if he had turned to stone or perhaps died in the chair. There was a slow—painfully slow--glint of realization moving like a slow-mo car crash across his face and Vanitas exhaled, dropping his head and rubbing his forehead with an irritated palm, enough to leave the offending skin red when Vanitas perked back up.

“You're a  _ camboy?” _

“It's...it wasn't something I wanted to do, I got bored and someone said you could make good money, s-so I thought...if I could try it out and pay my bills, I wouldn't have to rely on you and your shows. You work enough as it is and I hated asking you every month for help. I just—I was desperate, Vani! I didn't want to move back home to this, I didn't want to admit that I was a failure.”

“Sora--”

“I just...I want to be independent, okay? You kept getting upset at me for asking and you're always on the road and I know it's a bother to you. I don't want to make anybody feel like I'm a burden to them, especially not you! And I just....I just...”

“Hey, hey, no, none of that shit.” Vanitas said, reaching over to yank Sora's head down in a half-attempt of a headlock. Or a hug. Sora couldn't tell. What he  _ could  _ tell was that he was crying. For once, visiting his mother and he was crying from reasons other than his stepfather. Here he was, trying not to be a burden and yet was crying into his brother's chest, head hidden from view in case of prying eyes. “Listen. You're not a burden, alright? I didn't mind helping you out and...I can't say that what you're doing is  _ good  _ but, you do what you gotta. Delivering packages or...showing your own.”

Sora snorted, wiping his nose on his sleeve. “Shut up.”

“Seriously, Sora, it's okay. I promise. Shit wasn't so good for a while for me, either, that's all. I had my band mates to bounce off of, you haven't had anybody. I snapped at you a lot but it wasn't on you, okay? Shit was scary for a while. I even went homeless for a good month.”

“You what?!”

Vanitas raised his hand and shook his head. “Just because you make music and sell CDs and T-shirts doesn't mean you'll always make it big. You gotta pay for everything. A van, places to play, bouncers, producers, people who work on the lighting and sounds, parking, fucking permits—all out of pocket. Fights happen among the band, people get hurt, shit gets stolen, you end up in the middle of Arendelle in a blizzard with your van's tires stolen and have to cancel a show that was paid for and no refunds. Shit sucks.”

Vanitas flicked his lollipop stick off the balcony and fished around for another one, a grape. He wrinkled his nose but still undid the wrapper and popped it in his mouth. “You got out of here and stayed out. And one day, mom'll come with us. I could buy a lawyer, some thugs, a restraining order just—fuckin' something.”

“Yeah,” Sora said, stunned into silence from his brother's brutal honesty. It wasn't like him. But, at the very least, maybe it just meant that they weren't as distant as he thought. Vanitas was rude, mouthy, a 'bad seed', but his heart was always in the right place when it needed to be. In a sense, Sora supposed he should be lucky that his brother only  _ looked  _ like a punk until you got to know him.

They sat in silence for a long while, the ocean waves and muffled sound of the TV inside the only noises they had time to focus on. Sora became increasingly aware that the silence was growing awkward but only because he realized that him and his brother had nothing to talk about. Outside of a broken home or Vanitas' job playing in a band, they didn't really know much about the other after all these years. Sora wasn't even sure he had anything in common to bring up. Couldn't recall even one of Vanitas' friends names.

Maybe Sora had forgotten them. Or maybe Vanitas stopped talking about them because he stopped talking TO them. His face must've been contorted into something sad because he felt a hand on his shoulder shaking him back to awareness.

“It's getting pretty late. I'll drive you home.”

“Vani, that's almost a two hour drive!”

“Yeah, I got some things I gotta take care of around your town anyways. It's no trouble. Don't want you taking the train when it's pitch black out after last time.”

“But--” Sora frowned. Vani wouldn't take no for an answer, he knew that. Instead, he opted for a little nod that Vanitas copied and he watched his brother point his head towards the door.

“Meet me by the car, I'll say bye to mom for you.”

It was almost a half hour later when Vanitas bounced down the steps of the house, hair frazzled more than usual and blood pooling from his nose and down one eye. Sora quickly fumbled for the door on the passenger side but Vanitas was sliding into the driver's seat and locking the door as something hit what sounded like the roof of it, their stepfather shouting as Vanitas started the car.

“What the fuck happened?!”

“Nothing. He got pissy so I got pissy and he swung, fucking coward. I got half a mind to call the cops but then mom would--”

Sora searched the car for napkins but found nothing, instead opting to give Vani his hoodie.

“It's already red,” Sora said, letting his brother snort and dab lightly at the wound above his eye. It didn't look too bad, a particularly nasty bruise that would probably leave a bump, but at least the blood was stopping.

“I'm fine,” Vanitas said, looking at it in the rear view mirror and dabbing at his nose. “I'll buy you a new sweater.”

“It's just a hand-me-down,” Sora urged with a shrug. “ _ Are _ you okay?”

“Pissed.”

“Obviously,” Sora pouted, reaching for a sun-warmed bottle of water by his feet and unscrewing the cap to dab onto the unbloodied end of his hoodie. Vanitas took that end and immediately blotted away the worst of the blood, giving himself another inspection in the rear view mirror before deeming himself clean enough to drive.

“Just worried the cops will pull me over if they see but it should be dark before we hit the highway.”

“Vani...”

“We're stopping at a gas station, so get a drink or snack on me.”

Sora frowned, focusing his eyes on the sweater now caked with blood, but he gave a little nod as the car yanked away from the curb.

The drive was uneventful, Vanitas' music blaring through the speakers for most of it, both brothers lost in thought. Sora was thankful for the silence; he focused better in car rides just looking out the window and picturing a little dog running along side them, jumping off the roof of cars or grinding along the guard rails along the sides of the road.

On the other hand, Sora felt guilty. The silence probably felt awkward to Vanitas but what could he say? Vanitas had presumably gotten into a fight with their stepdad, probably had nothing to say otherwise. Thankfully, he had a break in his thoughts when Vanitas' phone rang and Sora handed it to him, the brother swiping and tucking the phone into his ear for the mouthpiece despite the voice coming through the speaker.

“V?”

“Yep.”

“Hey,” a male voice spoke, something staticky in the background. After a few seconds it stopped. “Sorry, was finishing dishes, saw I missed your call. What's up?”

“Gonna be in town in about a half hour, you free tonight?”

“Seriously?” A pause, some crinkling from the phone, some papers being flipped. “Uh...yeah, I'll probably be up until 2. What're you doing here?”

“Uhm.” Vani cast a side glance at Sora and then laughed. “Dinner with the family.”

“Yikes, is everything alright?”

“I'm fine.”

“You're a liar.”

Another laugh. “Yeah, I'm alright. I'll see you in a bit.”

“Alright. Don't bother with the doorbell, it's broken, just knock on the front right window.”

Vani hung up without saying goodbye and pocketed his phone, reaching for his soda and tucking it in his thighs so he could uncap it with one hand, taking a few sips. He looked at Sora and smiled against the cap. “What're you fuckin' smiling at?”

“You. It's been a long time but you're still a people pleaser, huh?”

“The fuck?” Vanitas capped his drink and fumbled to find the cupholder hole. “Where did that come from?”

“Your friend seems worried about you.”

“He's worried about every ant he finds in his house, don't think too much into it.” Vanitas sneered, flipping his blinker. “I'm not a people pleaser if they all piss me off, you know.”

Sora laughed this time, adjusting some of his bangs, “No, I guess not. But still, it's nice people care about you.”

Vanitas just gave a little nod before nudging Sora with his elbow. “Tell me how you really feel.”

“W-Well, I mean...I dunno, I'm feeling a little nostalgic, I guess. That's all.”

“Hm,” Vanitas looked both ways and then turned left down a long road, eyes roving the street names. “I know what you mean. I'm still an asshole, if that's what you're alluding to.”

“No!” Sora snapped quickly but Vanitas just snorted.

“I did punch our stepfather.”

“You said he started it!”

“Yeah, well,” Vanitas lightly touched a bruise starting to form above his eye and rolled a free shoulder. “He did. He made a comment I wasn't gonna fuckin' sit there and take, that's all.” Vanitas slowed the car and lined it up to the curb before getting out and following Sora to the door of his apartment. It wasn't an amazing place: the walls were chipped, the gutter was completely rusted and hanging on an angle, and the shingles on the roof were missing in a lot of places, but Sora didn't mind it.

Independent. That's what he said he wanted to be, and he was, and that was all that mattered. A few mice or a paper-thin wall wasn't going to stop him.

Sora stepped inside and nudged the light on, giving Vanitas a full view. He recalled the first night he moved in, carrying only a few boxes inside. The space seemed so large then for a studio but now here it was, covered wall to wall with furniture that was barely hanging together, wilted plants, a vacuum cleaner that looked like it belonged in the 70s, and a small kitchen sink full of dirty dishes.

Sora nudged off his shoes by the door and moved to the couch to sit down, tapping it in invitation, which Vanitas refused, eyes still looking around. Maybe it was the awful paint job that covered the windows, or the fact that the kitchen light was missing three bulbs, two of the slots filled with dangling wires. Or maybe it was the fact that the carpet was duct taped down on one side so it wouldn't lift off the floor.

Or maybe it was because Sora didn't have a bed anymore, just a sleeping bag tossed to the floor and a brand-new looking pillow, mottled with some dried drool, it looked like.

“Sora...”

“I know,” he said, curling in on himself just a little bit. “But it's not so bad! I can afford the rent, and I spend a lot of time at work so it's not like I'm stuck here all the time. Besides, it's easy to keep clean this way.” he teased, but Vanitas didn't return the grin, instead looking like he was personally insulted.

“We're finding you a new place. Or some fucking furniture at—”

“Vanitas, please. I promise. It's fine.”

“Sora, what about this is fine? You live in a shithole.”

“I don't—” He was cut off by a neighbor coughing, turning their television on next door, somewhere beyond the stove and kitchen sink. They may as well be in a room next to the kitchen. If this apartment  _ had  _ rooms. Sora shuffled uncomfortably on the couch and curled up tighter, clenching his toes together and then running a hand through his hair and keeping it there in a firm fist.

“I don't think it's that bad. It's better than home,” Sora spoke in a small voice, keeping his gaze averted. Vanitas sighed loudly, hearing another cough next to the wall. At least when Vanitas traveled, the hotel walls were a little bit more private than this. He stuffed his hands in his pocket and kicked at the floor a little.

“This is how you want to live?”

“No.” And it was right, Sora didn't want to live here specifically. Dreamed that he'd have a tiny apartment, sure, but bigger of a place for him to stretch out in. He wasn't even sure he could fit in the shower on day one. But at least when he heard yelling and screaming  _ now,  _ it didn't send him into a fight or flight panic response. The yelling wasn't at  _ him,  _ he was just unfortunately privy to it. Which meant that he still had to deal with it. Which meant he never truly got a good night's sleep. “No, it isn't.”

“Then come with me.” Vanitas offered.

“What?”

“Come with me. Just....travel. Be a roadie. You'd have to stay in hotels a lot, sleep on a tour bus, but at least you'd have fucking  _ room.  _ That's all I want for you is to be happy and this? This is pissing me off,” Vanitas said, gesturing to the entire apartment—not that there was much to gesture  _ to.  _ He was right of course, but Sora's pride wouldn't let him cave.

“Can I think about it? I just want to make sure that it's what I want.”

Vani shuffled a little and stuffed his hands in his jacket. “Yeah, you can. Mind if I wash up before I leave? I don't want to show up looking like this.”

“Yeah, that door.” Sora said and pointed, letting Vani walk to the bathroom. He left the door open so Sora just listened to the water run for a bit before shouting, “You know you're starting to bruise, they'll ask questions.”

“Yeah, they always do,” Vanitas shouted back, “But a bruise is better than blood at least. I already told them I was at mom's place so they could probably figure it out.”

Sora rubbed at his arms a bit before tipping his head towards the floor. Vanitas got into a fight because their stepfather said something. He had a feeling it was towards him. Why Sora didn't have a good job, why he wasn't doing well in life, coming there without a girlfriend, not that if Sora even liked women like that would he bring one over regardless. Still, he frowned, chewed on his thumb nail nervously as the water ran in the other room.

Vanitas stepped out a few minutes later with a pink face from presumably rubbing it raw but looked a little better. Face bruising a bit on one side and he had a split lip Sora didn't notice until now, but at least he didn't look like he tried to fight a truck and lost.

“Well, think on it, okay? I'll probably be back in the next month or so, we got a show coming up a few cities away.”

“Tickets?” Sora asked hopefully and Vanitas laughed. “Yeah, fine. I can get you in.” Vanitas ruffled Sora's hair and stared at him with an unreadable expression for a long while before sighing.

“Seriously. Please take care of yourself. I mean it. I'll kick our stepdad's ass but I'll kick yours more, and that's a promise  _ and  _ a threat.”

Sora laughed and nudged Vanitas' hand away but gave him a nod. “I promise.”

“Good.” Vanitas shuffled for a second and took another room around the apartment. “If you, uh, do shows...where's your computer?”

“I don't have one.”

“What?”

Sora tipped his head back on the couch and picked at his fingertips nervously. “I, uh, I use my friend's bedroom. And computer and....stuff. They used to do photography as a side job and when I jokingly brought up selling nudes, well...I guess, at least, their stuff is getting use again. And anyways, they're really nice and they're never home when I do my shows so it works out. I just do their laundry as payment and keep their bedroom clean.”

Satisfied, Vanitas shrugged and reached forward his fist, Sora knocking his against it gently. “Alright, alright, gross. You better not come asking me for money when you catch something.”

“Can't catch something if I'm single, idiot.” Sora snipped back, making Vanitas roll his currently-gold eyes.

“You never know. You might just catch these hands.”

“As if!”

Vanitas grinned and then made for the door. He hesitated, hand on the doorknob and giving Sora one last glance. He said nothing for a long while before seemingly deciding against it, shutting the door and leaving quietly. Sora sat on the couch and stared at the wall for a long while until he heard the car pull away. He didn't realize he was crying until his hands were soaked on his lap.

Sora didn't stream the next week, either.

_ _ It wasn't that he didn't want to but he had woken up on Thursday morning with a sore throat and swollen eyelids. He almost  _ sounded  _ like his brother with how gravelly his voice had become, but at the very least his fever wasn't all that high. Still, he slept like the dead and walked around the apartment looking positively terrible, pale-faced and blanket burrito wrapped around his shoulders tightly. He was shuffling about miserably when his door was knocked on and he opened it to see Ven's smile immediately fall off.

"Sora, are you okay?” he asked. Ven was wearing a thick hoodie and simple blue jeans with black-and-white sneakers, holding a bag in his hand. Sora said nothing but snatched the bag and ripped it open, revealing leftover homemade chicken noodle soup.

“You're the  _ best _ ,” Sora squeaked, sliding to the kitchen and popping the soup in the microwave.

“And you look like a train wreck,” Ven said, frowning at the doorway. “I thought you said you had a cold.”

“I do, I'm freezing,” Sora replied, watching the soup spin with impatient foot taps.

Ventus rolled his eyes and sat on the edge of the couch, “You know that's not what I meant.”

“Just a fever. And a sore throat. And I might have gotten sick a few times last night but I'm okay now.” Sora said. Ven just stared at him until Sora relented. “Really, I'm okay.”

“I don't just  _ ask  _ Aqua to make this soup for colds, Sora, I'm not stupid. Really, do we need to see a doctor? Do you have enough medicine? I can run to the store for--”

“Ven,” Sora gave him a weak smile, “I'll live. I promise. I got enough toilet paper to last me a week, five days if I blow my nose more than I should. I got enough water from the sink  _ and  _ I got a chunk of cash in the bank for a nice hot drink that I will definitely be redeeming later today at the cafe.”

“You're not leaving the house when you look like death, Sora.”

“I don't leave the house when I look healthy, Ven, so who's the real fool here? You trying to stop a man from getting a hot coffee?”

Ven laughed but crossed his arms, leaning back on the couch. “No, but I can stop a child from throwing a tantrum when I tell him it's for the best if he stays home and sleeps it off, before he gets the nice baristas sick as well.”

“Spoil sport,” Sora said, shuffling back to the microwave for his soup as the alarm dinged, fumbling in a drawer for a fork. “Don't judge me. You know I hate dishes.”

Ven got up with a sigh and moved towards the sink, starting the water and reaching for the sponge, shushing Sora's every attempt to shut him down. Sora eventually gave in and sat on the couch, sipping at his soup and wiping his chin. For a long while, there was silence, and that was nice. Having Ven here made it feel like he had a friend, that the walls weren't paper thin and agonizingly white. Empty. Devoid of life and charm and everything  _ else  _ a home should be. Sora just watched Ven without realizing, too adrift in his own thoughts to even realize Ven was talking about his day until a waving spoon caught him from his stupor.

“Hm?”

“I asked if you want this,” Ven said, currently watching Sora slurp from the edge of the container and narrowly shoveling noodles into his mouth. “I think you got it, though.”

“I'm nothing if not efficient.”

Ven snorted. “Efficient at being hopeless.”

“That's me!” Sora said, missing a carrot and watching it land on his jeans. Ven laughed softly and shook his head, putting the spoon in the strainer.

“I'm telling Aqua you're slandering her soup. She's going to be so mad.”

Sora's eyes went wide and he moaned out a soft 'no' before scooting up onto his knees. “Don't tell her!”

“She spent hours cutting those carrots.”

“Nooooo!”

“And you let it fall onto your pants. She's going to be so sad.”

“Nooooo!” Sora wailed, going back to stabbing his  _ soup  _ with a  _ fork.  _ “If she stops making me soup when I'm sick, I'll fucking die!”

“Well, who's fault is that?” Ven teased, finishing up the last few plates. There was a small silence before Ven glanced over his shoulder, frowning. “Are you feeling okay though?”

“Yeah.” Sora said, shuffling a little in place and swirling the remnants of his soup around with the butt end of his fork. “Vani and I had dinner at mom's last week and...he wants me to travel with him.”

“That's great!” Ven said, “That's really great! When? Do you need help packing? Terra still has his truck and--”

“I don't know if I want to go.”

A pause. “Why not? Anything's better than this little town and little apartment, Sora. You got the opportunity of a lifetime, here. I mean, traveling all the time might get old, but, think of the places you can see? You can hang out with your brother again. I thought that that was what you wanted?”

“I do,” Sora said, scratching at the back of his head and reaching for a tissue, blowing his nose for a little while before deeming it safe enough to continue talking. “I do, I just—what if I'm not happy there? Or, what if something happens and he gets mad and I have to get booted to the curb? I can't—I don't want to be left behind, again, Ven. I don't.”

“Hey, hey.”

Ven was at his side in an instant, crouched down and worry in his green eyes. He placed a hand to Sora's shoulder and frowned, looking at ho watery Sora's eyes had gotten. “Nobody is going to leave you behind ever again, alright? You know this. I know this.”

Sora sniffled, reaching for the tissue. At the very least, being on the verge of tears helped drain his nostrils a little bit, making the next blow a lot easier of an ordeal. Ven just reached for the roll of toilet paper on the table and handed it to Soa, who thanked him, reaching for a trash bag next to him to toss in the used tissue, unraveling the roll for the next one.

“Well...” Ven frowned, “I have to head downtown anyways. I could drop you off at the cafe if you want. I could pick you up but you'd have to stay there for about three hours. The bus there runs every thirty-five minutes, so you could catch one there as well.”

“...you're going to let me get a hot drink?” Sora said, eyes narrowed. “Why?”

“Nothing malicious, calm down.” Ven placated with a soft hand sweep, “Maybe...a hot drink will help you feel better.”

“Yeah,” Sora mulled it over for a minute, still tasting soup. He still had that old medical mask, he supposed if he took it off to order, it would be ok, he could drink far away, bring hand sanitizer, or sit outside. He was feverish so the cold wouldn't have bothered him too much. “Yeah, let me get dressed real fast.”

Sora shuffled to his dresser against the wall and started fumbling for clothes, Ven taking the tupperware bowl to the sink to wash that out as he waited. Sora was ready in a pinch and looked positively massive in his marshmallow jacket and beanie, medical mask across his face and skinny jeans. At least he was comfortable and that was all that mattered to him. Besides, it was the middle of winter, who would judge him?

“Alright,” Ven said, drying off the bowl and holding it, “Let's get you a drink.”

Sora stepped into the coffee shop and inhaled deeply. Nothing quite beat the scent of freshly roasted coffee, especially when it was warm and cozy in here. To each side of the small shop, books lined the walls for sale and he looked at them, deciding on touching them if he was sick, though he really wanted to check what they had.

He stopped at a small notebook and grabbed it, bringing it to the front counter.

He looked around at all the coffee makers, blenders, and toppings behind a glass cabinet behind the barista's head. Sliding the notebook on the counter, he smiled behind his face mask and caught eyes with the red-headed barista who was bent over, standing up straight and wiping flour off of her apron.

“Sorry about that!' she chirped, wiping her cheek with the back of her hand, “We ran out of donut sticks. What can I get you?” she asked.

“Uh, hi!” Sora said, looking at the menu quickly. “Can I get a salted caramel hot chocolate with some mint, raspberry, white chocolate and matcha?”

The barista paused, blinking violet eyes. “I'm sorry?”

“Yeah, it's weird,” Sora laughed, “I ordered it as a joke once and it kinda grew on me.” The barista just laughed, flicking a switch to start some hot chocolate.

“I don't judge,” she said, “I order my chai tea with raspberry and lemon.” She reached for a styrofoam cup and then punched in the order while Sora fumbled for his debit card, sliding it across the counter. Taking it, she swiped it and then frowned.

“Hold on, it got declined. One second.”

Sora perked up, looking confused. “I...that's weird, I just put some money in the bank last week.” he said, fumbling in his wallet for his bank slip. There was ample money in there. The barista shrugged and swiped the card again, shaking her head.

“I'm sorry, it's still declined. I can put your order on hold if you want to call your bank, maybe the system is down right now or something?” she asked. Sora wilted, shuffling sheepishly. He excused himself and walked to the front door, fumbling for his cellphone with shaky hands. Part of him wished to call Ven, to ask to pick him up, the other half knew he had to call the bank so he did. Eventually, they answered, and holding his hand to the mouthpiece, Sora spoke to them. After quickly explaining the situation, he paused, blinking twice.

“I....I'm sorry?”

“Yes, your bank recently had several large deposits and the bank froze your account because they considered it fraudulent.” Sora laughed bitterly. What?

“I'm sorry, I recently got a job and now I can't access my account?”

“Yes, sir, you'll have to come in in person so we can revert the changes.”

“Because I have money, they won't let me use it?” Sora asked, rubbing at his forehead. This was ridiculous. The bank teller continued to speak but he had zoned out. Part of him didn't blame the bank teller as they were just doing their job, and Sora's bank account had been in the red for a while. Suddenly having a decent chunk of cash shouldn't have rung any bells but....it did. He chewed on his bottom lip as the teller spoke. He could call Ven, probably get a ride to the bank, but he hadn't brought his ID with him and didn't want Ven to have to drive him all the way back to his apartment and then the bank. It was a waste of time and gas and he always felt bad asking Ven for favors. Bringing him here to get a drink was already asking too much, at least to Sora.

He saw someone moving to enter the shop and stepped aside, discussing his options and apologizing to the man who stepped inside.

“No worries,” the man said, watching as Sora pun his back to the door, tucking away in the corner to speak on the phone quietly.

The man stepped up to the counter and rung the bell once, twice, then three times, getting a laugh from the barista.

“You always do this,” she said with a laugh, working to presumably get his order. “Just for you today?”

“Yeah. I got an exam in two hours.” The sound of fingers drumming on the counter before stopping, a zipper being undone and a pocket being fumbled into for a card. “You able to get me the 'Kairi Special'?”

Another laugh. “If you're asking if I can toss in some of the good espresso, then yeah. If you get anything less than an A, I will personally come to your campus and kick your shins.”

“That's a pretty steep asking price.” She took the card and swiped it with a shrug.

“You know how it is,” she said, flipping a switch to start the milk foam, “I only expect the highest of quality, Riku.”

“Oof,” He turned to look at the man by the door and pointed with his chin. “What's his problem?”

Kairi looked over and then gave a small shrug, writing his order on a plastic cup. “His card got denied so he's on call the bank. He sounds awful, poor thing. Came in here looking sick as all hell.”

Riku looked for a few seconds and then slid back his card. “Put it on mine.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah, it's fine. You always sneak me some stuff anyways, it's the least I could do.”

Kairi laughed and then showed Riku the cup where the man's order was listed. Riku squinted at the ingredients and then frowned, fumbling in his pocket and opening a glasses case, slipping on his eyeglasses and then puffing out his cheeks in a gust of air. “Oh,” he said, “Maybe I made a mistake.”

“Shush!' Kairi teased, working on Riku's drink and then turning to focus on the newcomer's drink. “Anyways, are you coming to Olette's birthday party next week? She told me she was hoping to see you there, it's been a really long time.”

“Yeah, what time was it again, four?”

“Yup.” Kairi shook a can of whipped cream and scrunched her nose when it sprayed air, reaching into the fridge for a new one. “They rented out the old mansion so we're going to be heading that way for the party instead of her place. She figured it'd be for the best since her apartment can't hold us all.”

“That works for me. The one by the woods, right?”

“Mhm,” she slid over the other drink and jabbed her thumb towards the door. “Mind giving it to him? I didn't have time to ask for his name.”

Riku took the drink and nodded, leaning forward to kiss her hair. “You're the best. Oh, you left your pajamas at my house, you can come pick them up tonight if I'm not home. Top drawer.”

“The green ones?” She placed a hand to her heart and exhaled in relief. “Oh thank god! Olette asked me for them and I could NOT find them for the life of me.” He just smiled, heading to the door. The man was sitting and looking out the window, hand stuffed up under their hood.

“Uh, excuse me?” The man turned and looked up. All Riku saw was blue eyes, the rest of the face covered in a mask, bundled up deep. He was sick. Riku handed him the cup and gave him a small smile.

“On the house.”

The man took the cup and blinked down at it, up at Riku. “Um...thank you but I don't...I didn't have the munny, so--” He handed it back, dropping his head. Riku placed his hand palm forward and pushed it back.

“I paid for it. So take it.” he said, sitting on the opposite chair facing the man. “You're sick anyways, right? Flu or a cold?”

The man looked at him and then shuffled, curling into themselves and putting the cup on the table. “Cold. I think.”

Riku hummed, crossing his arms. “Yeah, everybody is getting sick these days. I think--”

“Ritsu?!” he heard shouted and he scowled. Kairi was leaning over the counter, waving the cup and giving him the biggest shit-eating grin she could manage.

“Nope, not me!” he shouted back, flashing back a smug smirk. Two could play at this game. Kairi rolled her eyes.

“Come get your damn drink before I dump it.”

“You wouldn't.”

“I would. Skuld said I could if you keep being a dick.”

“Me?!” Riku laughed, shaking his head and getting up. “Then I want to talk to your manager. Seems they didn't train you right and I got two hours to kill.”

“Nope, she doesn't want to see you, she said you're banned from the store.” Riku laughed again, taking the cup and flicking a munny to the counter.

“You wound me,” he said, heading back to his seat and sitting in front of the man again. “She's joking. We grew up together, she likes to bust my ass.” He set down his drink and then his backpack, fumbling for his textbooks and pens before looking up at the man, staring at his cup.

“Riku?”

“Yeah?” he asked, and then paused. Wait.

“...Sora?”

The man hesitated and then turned red, covering his masked mouth and staring wide-eyed at Riku. “Oh my God.”

Riku looked at the man, seeing nothing but blue eyes and a few strands of brown hair poking through the hood and slowly, Sora dropped it, slipped down the mask and beanie, revealing unruly brown spikes and a wet nose, which he quickly wiped at. Sora...was here. In his town. In his favorite coffee shop. At his table.

“I...”

“Wow,” Sora breathed. “Wow.” Riku didn't know what to say. Blatantly aware of how he must look. A beige cable knit sweater, whitewashed torn jeans and sneakers, and eyeglasses slipping down the bridge of his nose. He briefly recalled the fact that he had sent Sora a nude, so maybe Sora wasn't expecting what Riku  _ might  _ look like. Sora was probably still expecting a chubbier male, an older guy, even a cat-fishing woman. Instead, what Sora was forced to look at was a college student with bags under his eyes, a cup of coffee strong enough to kill a God, and unbrushed hair tossed up into a sloppy braid with fallen strands cascading down his shoulders, bangs obscuring his poor vision.

“Um...” Riku paused. Much like before, Sora was only inches in front of him, being even sick as a dog, the man was  _ beautiful.  _ Sora's skin was clean, his hair unreasonably soft looking. His lips were a little chapped, but they looked supple, and those eyes. Bluer than blue, a bright, gorgeous cerulean, unblinking as it drank in Riku's appearance. At least he hoped.

Sora looked an inch from bolting out the door.

“This is....awkward.” Riku said, a rough, quiet laugh.

“No, no it's not it's just...”

“Unexpected?”

“Yeah.” Sora scratched at the back of his head. “Well. At least you probably know why I haven't, uh....gone to work.”

“That makes two of us,” Riku said, poking at some textbooks. “Been up to my eyeball in exam prep.”

Sora looked at the spines of the books and frowned. “Bastion University?”

“No, Destiny.”

“Oh,” Sora sniffled and took a sip of his drink with a grimace. “You must be really smart, then.”

Riku hesitated, his turn to itch at the back of his neck, feeling those eyes burning a hole into his throat. “Not really...I got in on sponsorship at first. I just, uh...I just understand things. My first job on campus was actually doing other people's homework for them when I had spare time.”

“Isn't that illegal?” Sora asked, eyeing him. Riku hesitated and shrugged.

“Not if you don't get caught.” Riku winked and then hesitated over the rim of his cup. Did he just...? “Anyways, I-I don't do it anymore because I--”

“Got a new job.”

“Yeah.”

Sora laughed and the sound was even more precious with a strain on his voice from his cold. “Seems we have that in common. Pizza delivery boy, here.” he said. Riku snorted and shook his head.

“No fucking way were you a  _ delivery boy _ .”

“Well,” Sora ran a finger around the rim of his cup, biting a smile off his lips, “Could be worse, could be a camboy.”

Riku choked on his drink and looked around wide-eyed. Someone might've heard that and he wasn't about to explain to Kairi that he knew who Sora was, knew he did online videos. Thankfully, Sora seemed to have spoken quietly enough for nobody to catch on. Riku must have made a face because Sora laughed again and started coughing, covering his mouth quickly with his face mask. Riku handed him a tissue from the table and Sora took it, blowing his nose and pocketing the tissues.

Sniffling, Sora's bright face looked crestfallen, “Sorry, I know I shouldn't be out if I'm sick but I needed a pick-me-up.”

“No worries, I'm not here to judge.” Riku looked down at his own cup and rapping his fingers along the sides, the heat funneling down his hand and disappearing with every tap. Sora was staring at him with a fist propping his head up, looking absolutely like he would keel over at any moment.

“What are you even doing here, you look awful.” Riku blurted it out before he realizes, quickly waving his hands placatingly in front of himself. “I-I mean, you don't look  _ awful  _ but--!”

“I get it,” Sora said, a lazy smile on his face. “Just needed something hot to drink. Just waiting for the bus and I'll be heading home.”

Riku gave Sora a sort of look of disbelief. “If you're sick, you shouldn't take the bus. I can drop you off if you want, I was just going to study here until my exam.”

“Oh, no, it's okay, you don't have to do that.” Sora started but Riku was already stuffing his things back into his backpack.

“I insist, it's no trouble at all. My car's parked in the back and--” He got up from the table quickly and pointed, an indication of 'one minute', so Sora sat there. Not like he was going to get up anyways. Riku went back up to the counter and spoke to the girl—Kairi--who chanced a less-than-subtle glance at Sora and then nodded, reaching for something under the counter and sliding it across the wood, turning around to make what looked like another drink. Riku slid something over the counter and Kairi punched in a few buttons, handing it back as Riku came over with a container and a drink.

“Here, for the road. All they had left was broccoli and cheddar soup, but I hope that's alright. I got a hot chocolate for you, too, I couldn't remember the other order.” He slid them across the table and Sora paused, looking up at him.

“Why?”

Riku cocked his head. Looked at the drinks and food, at Sora's confused, pink face, his running nose, wilted strands of unruly chestnut hair. “Why...what? You're sick, and it's on the house. Consider it, uh...t-thanks.” This time, Riku turned away, focusing on his belongings, but Sora didn't miss the way Riku had darkened, was biting his lower lip as if he had said something offensive.

“Well, if you don't mind...thank you. Riku.” Sora scooped up his belongings and then followed Riku outside.

The car ride should have been awkward but it honestly didn't feel as awkward as their original meeting was moments ago. Riku seemed more sure of himself and less shy as he drove. Sora wondered if perhaps it was because Riku could focus on the road and it helped him concentrate or maybe the initial shock of meeting the  _ camboy  _ he had to watch pleasure himself—had to  _ control  _ pleasuring himself—wore off. Sora had given him his address and was currently sipping on his bitter drink, watching the roads go by as the lady on the GPS told Riku where to go.

“So,” Sora said, looking out the window and focusing on a particularly pretty house's gardening, “I, um...want to....thank you, too.”

“For a ride? It's no trouble,” Riku said, turning down a road and—oh--he raises his  _ pinkies  _ on the steering wheel when he does. Sora hid a smile, ignoring the reflection and instead focusing his view on the power lines strung up like hammocks outside.

“No. For modding. And, uhm. The picture. It was really nice even if it wasn't you.”

Riku blinked, chancing a glance over and then stepping harder than he intended on the brakes as the car in front jerked quickly to a stop. They both lurched forward but Riku didn't have the time to apologize. “Should I try and convince you it IS me? I wouldn't just send you a picture of some random guy, Sora.”

“You could've. I wouldn't have known.”

“Until today,” Riku said with a laugh, slowly easing his foot back to the gas, the car gliding smoothly down the bumpy road. “I get what you mean, in this day and age you shouldn't be....honest, with strangers. I'll admit, it wasn't like I  _ knew  _ you lived around here. People I mod for work all around the world. Didn't know I had someone half an hour away from me, especially a hot-and-upcoming star.”

“Me?” Sora laughed incredulously but had to stop as he coughed hard beneath his face mask. “Nah, I don't think so. Last week's show was just a fluke with viewers to be honest. I'll probably go back down to a handful, come Friday. I already missed two weeks, people already moved on to the hot new thing, I'm sure.”

“I'm not.” Riku said, fumbling in his pocket for his phone and waiting for a red light to start flipping through the contents. He pressed a few buttons and handed it over to Sora, who took it and stared at the screen. On it, was an email, and the contents were from the company they both worked for. There were some general complaints—nothing directed towards Riku directly but about the site and users as a whole—some contractual lingo, and then finally, Sora's username.

His eyes roved the content and he paused.

“What?!”

Riku's lips upturned into a smile. “Well, every few weeks, we basically hold a conference through email and can talk about the site, users, things we wished were changed, features we think would be nice added, the whole shebang. But, outside of that, this is how we handle things like sponsorships and recommendations. The front page, making sure sponsored camshows users are talking and showing products or whatever, making sure problematic users are permanently banned.” Riku turned down another street. “And, well, the long-time mods get to basically recommend people for the front page and sponsorships as well.”

“I don't understand,” Sora said, rereading the email. “Why would...?”

“Well, after working there for a long time, fresh meat is generally torn to pieces and they leave after one show. You came out the gates swinging. You grabbed a lot of people's interests. So, my boss wants to have you sponsored by a toy company. You should have gotten the email a few days ago.”

“Oh,” Sora looked down at his own phone and frowned. “I don't have internet at home so...”

Riku scrunched his nose in confusion, peeking over quickly. “Then, how--?”

“I use my friend's house. They aren't home on the weekends and they let me use their stuff so...” Sora chewed nervously on his bottom lip. That explained it. Riku looked over and then nodded.

“Well, I guess if it works that's alright. Would explain why you didn't answer my emails. I think that--”

The GPS woman spoke, saying they had arrived. Riku pressed the brakes and looked at the house next to Sora through the passenger side and his heart sunk. His face must have betrayed his heart because Sora was quickly fumbling for his belongings before Riku reached a hand out.

“Hey, wait!”

“What?”

“Uhm...here, hold on.” Riku fumbled for a piece of paper, but grabbed the closest thing he could, a piece of gum wrapper. He frowned but scrawled his number quickly. And slid it to Sora.

“If you ever need a ride or something, I'm around. Just call me, alright?”

Sora looked down at the paper, at the cups and container in his hand, back up at Riku. At those brilliant eyes, that silver hair tossed in a sloppy braid, that thick sweater. Eyeglasses. A worried expression and a dusting of pink across his cheeks. Sora swallowed hard and nodded even faster.

“Okay, I will. Thank you, Riku.”

“No problem. It was nice to meet you, Sora, in the flesh.” A pause, Riku looking like a deer in the headlights. Sora just laughed and then gave him a lopsided smile behind his face mask.

“I'm glad you like my flesh. I hope my personality didn't disappoint.” Riku's face just darkened further and Sora gave a nod, turning his back. “Good luck on your exams!”

Friday rolled by and Sora felt much better. His throat was still a little scratchy but he figured it wouldn't be that bad if he didn't do anything like last time. He glanced down at the box taped up with an inconspicuous address but he knew what he was. He had been  _ sponsored,  _ would get a 'bonus check' in the mail within the next two weeks after his show. He had gotten a rundown of what was in it through a text by Riku, and checking his friend's computer, he had been given the same idea. There was a new blanket from the company as thanks resting atop the box. Sora ran his fingers over it and smiled. It was silky soft and warm, a decent-sized fleece. He was glad he recorded at his friend's house or he'd be using it right now. Thankfully, it would keep him warm at his own drafty place.

He stuck his hands in the box and fumbled around. He found a bottle of lube—typical—and a hand-written card from the boss.

_ Dear SleepingKeyhole: _

_ _ _ _ _ We hope this package finds you well. As a sponsored user, we wish you the best of luck in your endeavors and want to thank you personally for streaming on our platform. Inside the box, you will find a myriad of items for your personal pleasure. As sponsor, you will notice that some of these items are labeled by the company that is offering them for your use. We simply require you to try out the item and speak about it positively on your stream. Once done and confirmed by our mods, you will receive financial compensation. You may keep the items as a personal token of appreciation. _

_ _

_ _ Sora sat on the edge of the bed and swung his legs as he stripped down to nothing but the blanket, proper over his lap and warm as can be. He sighed pleasantly at the touch, soft as silk against his bare thighs; he was definitely going to sleep naked with this quilt. Eventually, the clock struck down, and reaching forward to hit 'stream', he waited for the connection to turn green and he smiled at the screen.

A familiar username popped in immediately and his grin got wider.  _ Hey, cutie. _

“Hello, everybody!” Sora said, watching as two more people filtered in, “We're going to wait a few minutes for people to come in and then we'll start. I have a good stream tonight.” People filtered in slowly in a trickle, and when Sora was done making small talk, he smiled again, slapping his thighs.

“So, today, we're going to do a small unboxing. I have a lot of toys that I'd love to try and we'll talk about them, maybe we’ll have the stream pick what I use?” He lifted the box with a grunt on display of the camera, holding a pair of scissors on top of it. “Now, I'm recovering from a cold, so I apologize if I keep coughing, it's difficult to stop. I hope that you all forgive me for that.”

A wave of typing, of 'it's fines' and 'don't worry' and 'I'm sick too' erupting in the chat box. Sora nodded, poking at the box until it opened again having resealed it shut for the surprise. He had to sell this. Rent was due. Rent was  _ late. _

_ _ “Okay! Let's see!' Sora shoved his hand inside and reached, grabbing the lube bottle. It was white with a black label, the website plastered on the front. “They're selling a new lube and it smells incredible.” Sora popped the top and inhaled, giving a small 'mm'. “Vanilla! I think they sent a strawberry one, too?” He put it aside and fished out the second bottle, repeating his motion. “Yep, strawberry. This one is really strong.” He squirted out a little bit on his finger and brought it close to the camera, rubbing it between his fingers and letting it glisten in the bright light before opening his fingers and watching it stretch.

“It's sticky, water soluble but very slick. For those size queens out there, I definitely recommend it, it'll get that toy in you quicker than you can ask 'is that it?'” The chat erupted into emotes, one person being timed out. Sora tried not to smile. Riku was certainly paying attention  _ this  _ time. Still had two hands empty, he presumed? Sora would have to change that.

“What next?” he asked, fumbling for a second package. He started tearing out pieces of brown packaging paper and glanced over at the chat. “Bend over while you look? Only if you donate.” Sora teased, but wiggled a little regardless. He had half a second before he heard the telltale ding of a donation and laughed.

“Ooh, eager are we...? Well, I suppose I have no choice.” Sora quickly folded the blanket and put it on the bed behind him, taking the box and sliding it off to the side. When he reached down to grab something within, he hunkered over the edge of the bed, ass on display, balls swinging softly as he gave a playful little wiggle. “Mm, we got some goodies for sure...” Sora cooed, voice picked up quieter on the mic but still crystal clear.

“It's a  _ big  _ package, this one.” Sora said, leaning over further and sliding his thighs wider, chest barely visible between his legs. More donations. His scrunched up his feet and wiggled them teasingly at the camera as he fumbled for the larger box and hoisted it onto the bed. The box was long and rectangular, a plain white thing. Sora picked at the tape with his nail and eventually pried it open. Inside was another rectangular package, this one a soft, pastel pink. Sora undid that box too and inside was a bumpy dildo, soft and jelly-like in its texture.

“Oh, now  _ this  _ is fun,” Sora said, pulling on the tip and watching it spring back into his hand with a soft slap. “I used to use these a few months back when I was practicing some things. It's how I found out I don't have a gag reflex.” The chat burst into action at the words and Sora laughed. “It's a shame I'm sick, but let's see if I still got it.”

He put the tip to his lips and hesitated, giving the chat a little smile. “Oh, this is from the Sleeping Beauty company, be sure to check them out! Now, let's see what their product is like,” Sora said.

He adjusted his spot on the bed so he was sitting with his side to the camera, and tipping his head back, he opened his mouth. His tongue poked out and then flattened, and with a sharp inhale, Sora grabbed it firmly by the base and sunk it in and  _ in,  _ the bulbous spheres pressing down deep into his throat. The stretch was obscene enough to make his throat extend, every bump perfectly on display for the hungry crowd watching at home. Sora made a small noise, closed his eyes tight and tipped his head back further, the toy firmly seating at the base where his fist was. Sora let the camera see it for a long few seconds before he pulled it out of his mouth slowly.

Every bulb rubbed against his raw throat and he fought back not to gag. It wasn't that the toy was too big but perhaps doing this when still sick wasn't the smartest decision he made. Still, he pulled the toy out as agonizingly slow for the camera as he could, felt the bulbs slip out of his throat and the muscle relax. He pulled the tip out with an obscene pop and watched a thick ribbon of drool follow the toy out as he moaned.

“Perfect,” Sora said, hearing the ding of donations, the text a constant curtain on the side of his head. There hadn't been a time out in a while or a deleted comment at least in the glances Sora had chanced. He bit back a smile.  _ I hope you're enjoying the show, Riku. _

_ _ “Okay, what else?” Sora said, rubbing his hands. He leaned back over the bed and made sure to 'accidentally' rub an ass cheek, giving a delightful little spread to the camera. Nothing that hadn't been seen before, but it had been two weeks since the last show; he could spoil them a little bit as apology. He shuffled around in the box and tossed handfuls of tissue paper to the floor before finally emerging from the box with a smaller one in his hands.

He sat back on his knees and peered at the box from all angles. “Uhm, not sure what this is, there wasn't a label. So, let's open it and see.” He started picking at the tape and then pried it out, sliding out a plastic package and then looking at the contents. Oh. “Oh, wow.”

He slipped it from the package and then showed the camera. It was a cylindrical tube, a soft fleshy peach color with a darker purple border, small notches on the 'cover' where his fingers would grip. Sora looked at the pocket pussy and then aimed it towards the screen so the viewers could see.

“Now, this is from the Agrabah Association, they market both male and female toys like these. I think they only sent a female version but that's alright.” Sora said. Peering into the opening, he slipped his finger inside with a soft squelch, feeling around inside. “It's really silky, very smooth. A lot of resistance but that's perfect for its use.”

Sora put it on the bed and reached for one of the bottles of lube, squeezing out a small amount on his finger and then reinserting it into the toy. The give was much easier and his finger glided along the sating innards. “Well, well,” Sora gave a soft, breathy laugh and then looked over at the camera. “I'm still under the weather but I don't want to leave you guys with nothing. So let's try this puppy out.”

He took more lube and squirted it inside the toy. He would normally spend time prepping himself, but somehow, his heart wasn't in it this time. In fact, he almost felt nervous, and he knew it wasn't from the influx of viewers or the constant wave of texts and emoticons on the chat box off to the side on the computer.

No, it was because of--

Sora stroked himself to full hardness and then looked down at the toy, back up at the camera, and then angling himself better on his legs so he sat back. His side was again to the camera, his dick hard and on display right above his thighs. He took a shuddering breath and pressed the tip of the toy against himself, feeling the opening give way enough for his rosy tip to sink in. He gave a low moan, gripping the toy firmly with both hands and sinking it down inch by glorious inch, the resistance too much for his body to catch up to.

“It's nice...” he breathed, pulling the toy all the way up until it popped off with a wet squelch, a ribbon of lubricant slipping out and plopping down onto his dick like honey, glistening and crawling down his hips. He huffed out a breath and sunk the toy back down, much easier this time, grinding his hips up to meet it the final inch and pressing it down hard against his stomach, groaning.

For a while, he forgot about the stream, about the little green light in the corner, the filler lights cooking his skin and overheating his already feverish body, the marquee of text in the corner of his eye. He just thrust into the toy slowly, let his thoughts wander. For a moment, they flickered to his brother who offered him a place to stay. Would he still be able to do this on the side when he his brother did shows, left alone in the tour bus? His hips stuttered almost to a halt. No, now wasn't the time to think about that.

His mind instead wandered to teal eyes smiling over a coffee cup. The universe had smiled down on him that day. He had actually met the person in his dreams, the one who haunted them like a pale ghost ever since that one nude was sent. He didn't  _ see  _ any muscles that day, but an oversize sweater would do that. Sora glanced over at the computer screen and saw Riku's username at the top under mods, imposing as ever. His eyes trailed down to the green recording light—green like those piercings on the biggest cock he'd ever seen—and Sora's hips gave a languid roll. What would those piercings feel like, he wondered? Would they feel as good as the bulbs on that dildo the company had sent? Would they feel fantastic dragging inside Sora's innards, stuffing him impossibly full?

Sora groaned, moving to all fours and holding to the toy to the bed, fucking into it with snapping hips. The hair that wasn't damp with sweat on the back of his neck tickled his shoulders and he wondered how silky Riku's hair was outside of that sloppy braid. How it would feel curling onto his spine as Riku hovered above him, kissing down his neck and nibbling along his ear. A bead of sweat rolled down his spine and he wondered how the tip of Riku's tongue felt grazing down his flesh. Was that pierced too? He hadn't even checked.

“Hah...” He was getting close, the toy was squeezing hard, the slick of the lube and his own precum making the glide impossibly silky, caressing his skin like satin but clamping down like a vice. Was this how he would feel, speared on Riku's cock in some wonderful hotel room's bed, face down and ass up just for him? Speech was difficult for him now, he was sure he was trying to talk to the stream but all he heard in his ears was incoherent babbling. The toy muffled most of it, the wet spurt of it may as well be echoing with its volume. “A-Ahh...”

Sora clenched and it made his cock jolt in the toy, squeezed down and sending a delicious wave through his body. He was so close, he was burning, his cock was aching in the toy and he felt the knot of pleasure unraveling, whipping about his belly like a hurricane. Just a few more thrusts and--

“It was nice to meet you, Sora, in the flesh.”

He clenched his eyes shut. He was no longer face down being fucked by behind by Riku.

Now he was on top, fucking into that taller man's ass, feeling the squeeze gripping him, milking him, greedily sucking and tugging and grinding into him, goading him to finish. Teal eyes clouded over in pleasure, silver hair splayed around Riku's head like a halo as Sora pounded into him. What would it feel like to bring a man like that to the absolute edge of heaven and break him?

Sora rubbed his face deeper into the pillow, thrusting as hard as he could into the toy and constantly adjusting his slipping feet on the sheets. He was moaning so loudly with his already sick throat, he sounded  _ pained  _ but it didn't stop—he couldn't stop—feeling the knot finally fray and snap within him as he buried himself to the very hilt of the toy.

“F-Fuck, I— _ fuck, Riku _ \--!”

Wait.

_ Wait. _

_ _ _ Did he just--?! _

_ _ “A-ahh!”

He didn't have time to think about what he may or may not have just said, feeling himself throb inside the toy and making it impossibly slicker. He was twitching and writhing on the sheets, rubbing his cheek to the pillow like a cat in heat. The toy was dripping lube onto the sheets and Sora briefly realized this in his fuzzy head space. He was heaving breaths and coughing hard, woken early from his stupor by his sore throat seeking vengeance for all the moaning. He dragged himself to the edge of the bed and fumbled for his water bottle, suckling it down quickly and coughing when he finished.

He couldn't catch his breath fast enough. When he was able to calm down enough and move to a sitting position, he apologized to the stream for his coughing. He had said he was sick but this was unprofessional, and glancing at the chat, his heart sank. Riku's name was gone.

Heart hammering, Sora sheepishly scratched at the back of his head. “U-Uhm...well, I think I'll call the stream early tonight, I'm still feeling under the weather. But I'll be back again on Friday, same time, same place. I'll post the links in the description for all the toys I got today, so I encourage you all to check them out, you won't be sorry!”

Sora gave a small peace sign and a wide grin, crinkling the corners of his eyes as he closed them. “You all have a wonderful holiday season! Sleepingkeyhole signing out!”

Sora stepped from the shower and checked the stream website but Riku's name was still offline. He glanced at his phone and frowned. He had his number, he could text him. Apologize. He hadn't meant to....he didn't mean to say his name, let alone as he was  _ jerking off for an audience.  _ Still, the guilt consumed him. He met him only a few days ago and already scared him away. Biting his fingernail, he reached for his phone and started typing a message.

_ Hey, it's me. I'm really sorry about what happened on stream. Idk what came over me. Please don't be mad. _

_ _ Riku didn't answer. Sighing, Sora microwaved his leftovers and ate them slowly, watching an old movie on his tiny TV and then heading to bed after brushing his teeth. He looked over at the box of toys—the pocket pussy thoroughly cleaned as if it would rid the guilt away—and frowned. He grabbed the fleece blanket and curled himself up tightly on his makeshift bed. He checked his phone again. Nothing. He felt tears prickling the corners of his eyes and rubbed at them before typing another message.

_ I could get another mod if you want. I didn't mean to-- _ _ _

_ _ He stopped his message, seeing that he got an attachment. Pausing, Sora quickly hooked up to the neighbor's internet and downloaded it. It took forever, only having one bar, but Sora frowned as he watched the numbers tick down. What was it? An angry message written by hand saying to leave him alone? Maybe it was a resignation letter to the website company saying Sora didn't deserve the sponsorship. Or maybe it was--

_ DOWNLOAD COMPLETE. 2.1MGS/2.1MGS _

_ _ Sora closed his eyes and took in a breath. His finger tapped the picture and then he felt a blast of pain. He dropped his phone on his face, rubbing the red spot as he fumbled for his phone. Had he seen wrong? Squinting an eye open, both of them flew open wide.

Riku had sent another picture. Of himself. Naked.

Except this time, there was something...new about it. For one, Sora could see his lips, still angled enough to hide his face. For another, he could see that silver hair, still in a braid but a much tighter one.

And for a third, there was pearly white sheen across his belly.

Down his cock.

Down his fingers  _ holding  _ said cock.

Down every single beautiful divot of abs in the dim light of wherever Riku was.

Sora swallowed hard. “Okay, that's not....what I expected,” he whispered.

_ Um. Wow. _

_ _ He hit send, feeling like a fucking idiot. What else could he say? There was an ellipses and then a new message.

_ I'm flattered you thought about me. The toy was really that good, huh? _

_ _ _ Yeah,  _ Sora texted,  _ Not as good as the real thing. Probably. _

_ _ _ Well. You'll have it one day. It's surprising you haven't. You're adorable. _

_ _ Sora laughed softly. Where was  _ this  _ Riku when he met him? Then again, Sora wasn't one to talk. He was the absolute worst looking and feeling he could have been that day. Still, he texted back.

_ No way, I'm going without until I'm 30. I heard you get superpowers. _

_ _ Sora snorted. Honestly, he was typing out of his ass. He was embarrassed. He, the one who jerked off for viewers around the world for donations, was embarrassed. Every time he saw the ellipses, he felt his stomach drop.

_ Well. Maybe I can change your mind. _

_What?_ Sora's stomach plummeted to his ass. Another attachment. Sora hesitated and opened the internet again, downloading it. Every second was agony but he couldn't feel anything else but his heart racing. The little bar filled up slowly and eventually, it finished. Sora opened it and paused.

The picture was what looked like a restaurant menu of a Bistro. Sora hesitated, staring at it.

_ My date canceled on me. How about I take you out to dinner? _

_ _ Sora's jaw dropped. Was he....asking Sora out? He started fumbling for his text message, fingers shaking, trying to form the words.

_ Htat snouds great eyah _

_ _ A pause. Sora was a fucking idiot.

_ Good. Thursday, 7PM. I'll come pick you up. Sleep well. Try not to think of me too hard, they didn't send you  _ that  _ many toys. _

_ _ Sora laughed and sat up in bed for a brief moment. He typed out way better this time, focusing hard.

_ It's a date. _


	4. Heartache

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Riku and Sora have their dinner date to discuss what happened last stream but it gets cut short when Sora gets a call...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was supposed to be posted on Valentine's Day but it's been a few months since the last update as it is. I haven't had the time to write and then when I DID, I was so writer's block-y that I couldn't manage much, I apologize. This chapter's writing admittedly feels funky since I've been writing it for months but it feels stale in some parts and I'm very sorry for that--I'll do better next chapter.
> 
> You may notice some familiar usernames this chapter. Please note that while there are a lot of scummy KH fans, me making a parody of their likeness is just for fun; I am not here to start a war or attack them personally, it's just meant to be silly. 
> 
> Also, apologies for another not-so-streamy chapter, I know it's Camboy AU but I promise next chapter will be an absolute doozy. Three more to go! Thank you to everyone leaving kind comments and kudos, I really appreciate it! While I made this account to post NSFW fics, this is by far my most popular KH fic ever and I cannot thank you guys enough. 
> 
> @Vanplitwo on Twitter

“Are you out of your  _ fucking mind?! _ ”

He heard the hiss a little too late, turning just in time for his hoodie's collar to be yanked and jerked downwards, staring into very angry blue eyes and a pink face, presumably from racing down the corridors of the college.

“Hello to you too, Roxas.”

“Don't be fucking cute with me, you know exactly what you did!”

“I didn't—” Riku looked left and right before deeming the coast clear, nodding his head towards the library just a few doors down. Inside, he peeked around and considered it safe before exhaling, swinging an ankle around the other and sighing. “What are you mad about?”

“What am I--?!” An angry huff escaped the smaller blond and arms crossed. Roxas was mulling over exactly what to say long enough for Riku to bring in the musty scent of books and warm printer ink, the gentle hum of the copy machines off to the side and the faint fans of the computers. Another sigh and he caught sight of black painted nails pinching the bridge of Roxas' nose before he ruffled his hair and glared.

“Did you not think that  _ any other mod  _ would be watching in? Look, I don't know what fucking game you think you're playing but not only was that a sponsored stream cut  _ short,  _ but he  _ very clearly _ said your name.”

“That could be--”

“Don't you even say 'it could be anybody's' name because I'm not that stupid. And neither are you. Look.” Roxas perched himself on top of a table and slipped his bag off. “I don't care if you have a crush on him or whatever but you know what the rules are for this job. Streamers and viewers have to have a level of anonymity--”

“--and confidentiality. I know. I know  _ you  _ know _ I _ know.” Riku said, leaning against the edge of a bookcase so as to leave the old books alone. “I know.”

A pause. A disappointed sigh. “So why does he know your name?”

Riku chewed on his cheek. He couldn't very well tell Roxas everything, but even if he told him  _ enough,  _ it would be deemed suspicious he thought. At the very least, he could tell him just what he wanted to hear to placate him and nothing else, be silent and done with it. His shoulders slumped and he caught sight of blue eyes very expectantly glaring at him.

“You won't believe me but we accidentally bumped into each other in person.”

“And you, what, went up and said hello?!”

“It wasn't like that. Not...I mean not exactly.” Riku scratched at the back of his neck and watched Roxas stuff his hands into his hoodie pocket, scowling. Waiting. Cat-like in the very motion and waiting for this overgrown mouse to fuck up so he could pounce. “I went to Skuld's coffee shop, went to study for a bit. There was a really sick man there having some bank issues and I paid for his drink, went to give it to him and....it happened to be the streamer.”

“You're not fucking serious.”

“I mean, you could ask Kairi, she was there, but then you'd have to tell her who exactly that brunette was and I'm  _ sure  _ you don't want to mention that.”

Roxas' eyes narrowed but he said nothing. He couldn't get a leg up on Riku if they had the same exact occupation. Two could play at this game and he knew it; he wasn't in it to win, just enough to stand his ground. Roxas opened his mouth but quickly shut it, instead making a motion in his hoodie pocket that Riku knew as him spinning a ring around his finger in contemplation.

“Do you like him?” came the question and it was Riku's turn to stand there and think.

Did he like Sora? He thought he was cute, had a nice laugh. The definition of energetic wasn't strong enough to describe the whirlwind of energy that Sora was. Bubbly and warm, he enraptured the hearts and attention of everyone in the stream and Riku didn't need to pay full attention to see that. Sora was a happy-go-lucky sort of fellow, with bright eyes, a bright smile, and a bright personality, so bright he was practically the sun itself in his radiance, the way he warmed and drew people in like a personal comfort.

In Riku's time as a mod, there had been weird characters, nice people, all sorts of personalities and likes and dislikes but nobody came close to what Sora could provide. Did he like him? Of course he did. He was sure everybody who saw Sora liked him. Liked the tiny smattering of freckles along his back. Liked the way that unruly hair bounced and quivered with every motion. Liked the way his laugh was melodic like a wind chime, tinkering and tender, loud enough to be heard but not enough to overpower everybody else.

Even when Sora wasn't doing anything on stream, he was sweet. Shy, admittedly, in person but Riku supposed that that made two of them. Riku wasn't much one to talk to people or be the spotlight in a crowd but as far as other streamers and viewers knew, he was this really 'cool guy' and everyone respected him. Didn't know he often burned coffee at home, had poor vision, and couldn't talk to strangers to save his life. Didn't know he sometimes took pills to sleep when the pain from old wounds got too much, didn't know he drank wine just to feel anything—something--other than depression, other than the constant weight of the world on his shoulders from overbearing parents and the need to stay in the top percentage so he could have a good job.

So he wouldn't be a failure like most of his peers thought he was. Expected him to be.

“That's a loaded question,” he elected to respond with, getting a roll of eyes.

“I meant 'like like'. What are you, fucking twelve? You know what I meant.”

“I mean...” Did he? He certainly liked Sora enough to send not just one but two pictures. Bundled up all of his confidence in the flash of a smartphone camera, sent the pictures, and tossed his phone to the other end of the bed as if the very vibration of a reply was a bomb. Had confidence enough to ask him out to dinner. It wasn't as if he was planning on making it a romantic date; it wasn't even that the person who canceled was pursued in terms of a relationship. Just two friends who hadn't seen each other in years going out for drinks and a bite, catch up.

But it really begged the question: what was he even doing? Now that Sora was known to live close by it wasn't like he was long distance. Wasn't even like Riku knew if he were single or not. A lot of the streamers were dating or in a marriage and still did shows, solo or together. People needed money, he wasn't there to judge, having to moderate over said activities with a smile and professional attitude.

But the more he thought about it, the more he came to realize that, though he didn't know  _ now, _ he would probably know eventually.

“I...might have a crush.” he admitted meekly.

“Another one?” Roxas sighed, clapped Riku's shoulder. “C'mon. Let's go to your place. Pizza's on me this week.”

Riku snorted, scratching at the back of his head. “I really am in trouble aren't I?”

“Yup. We're getting anchovies.”

“No!”

Roxas thumped him hard on the back and reached for his bag. “Yes. Now shut up and give me the keys, I'm driving Timber.”

Riku snorted. “Why do you always call my car that?”

“Fine. Miniku-per. Now shut up and let's go, I'm hungry.”

The next streaming day came and went. Rather than Sora's usual Friday slot, he squeezed into a Wednesday spot so he could finish up his cut-short sponsor stream. Propped up behind Sora's head was now a small whiteboard, a little gray from what looked like the whiteboard being constantly written on and erased, well-loved and used. In somewhat erratic but readable writing were the words 'Top Donators'. Sora had had to finish his sponsorship stream and even started back from scratch, apologizing for cutting it earlier last week due to being sick. It had only been ten minutes that the stream had gone on for, give or take, when the chat started becoming somewhat erratic. Sora was still showing off all the toys, the benefits of certain lubes on certain materials, the proper use of using condoms on your toys even if they're well-washed and other tidbits when something caught Riku's eye. He had just lifted his glass of wine to his lips, looking over a new assignment curriculum when he noticed something familiar.

_ PeachGobbler: Where's Riku? _

He inhaled—so he thought. Sora was in the middle of describing an egg-shaped vibrator like the one he used streams prior when his eyes glanced over what was the presumable chat. Sora's smile slid briefly before crooking back up as best as he could manage. Sora was ignoring it. Riku was looking at the message. Peach was a regular viewer since the second stream, had always been polite and courteous, yet Riku's panic instinctively made his mouse cursor hover over 'time out'. He sighed, ground his teeth and let it go. They hadn't done anything wrong but he couldn't help but feel a cold drop of fear.

Brushing his fingers through his hair, he turned his attention back to his homework and tried to focus despite his ears tuning in to every word Sora said. He was tapping his pen across the lined college-rule and reading the words but nothing was coming to his brain. There were  _ words _ but nothing he said was registering.

“--it's always very important to make sure to take this toy slow. Even though it doesn't look very large or intimidating, these large bulbs right here can cause some soreness if you take it too quickly or go too rough with it.”

Riku turned his head to see the toy he was talking about and it looked like anal beads glued together to make a dildo. It started narrowly, growing thicker as it went to the base which was flat. Sora was currently discussing said flat base and why it was very important for anal play when Riku's eyes glanced back to the chat.

SealofApproval: Maybe he sent the toys

PeachGobbler: Ooh maybe!

SealofApproval: Wait isn't Riku a girl's name?

PeachGobbler: lol

PleasureDog: ya but a girl can buy a guy toys too

SealofApproval: Riku sounds pretty special!

Sora cleared his throat and shimmied, his skin flushing pink as he focused his attention back to this toy. “S-So this one--”

Riku flinched. Most of the chat was discussing the toys, talking about places to buy them, the usual donation pings and messages being posted with a green block of text in the chat were enough to draw Riku's eye away but only for a little bit. Hard to focus on  _ that  _ when people were basically talking about him out of earshot. He had half a mind to time them out, to get the conversation back on topic, but if he timed them out, people would get suspicious.

He sent a whisper to Sora saying 'I'm sorry'. It took a few seconds but he knew the male had seen the block of text when his smile slid into something more thin-lined and guilty. “It's okay,” Sora said—to Riku-- “We're here to learn and not make  _ mistakes _ , because we're all human, and sometimes we say things in the heat of the moment like 'oh my god'...which is what you'll probably be saying when you buy  _ this _ toy, now, this is called the Kingdom and it--”

Riku slumped back in his seat. Less than subtle, but he hoped it would work. The chat was now starting to filter but every now and then he caught messages of the viewers discussing the mysterious 'Riku' and how it was a shame 'SleepingKeyhole' was probably taken. 'Maybe he's bi', said Peach. 'Maybe he's got it bad for Riku', Seal replied. On it went for the most agonizing hour of his life. Riku couldn't even really enjoy Sora using one of the toys, what looked like a dark blue foam baseball bat with a hook at the base. Eventually, the stream would drop it he was sure. People said shit all the time on stream and it's not like anybody would clip a random streamer saying a name. Most of them were married or cucking or moaned a viewer's name as a form of a donation perk. It shouldn't be any different, he thought.

Or, he did...

Of course, peace was never an option for his life. He had been halfway through writing a sentence when he heard absolute silence and looked up to see scrunched eyebrows from Sora. He was reading something but what was he--?

_ Notyourdudebro: when r u going to fuck sum1 lol _

Riku rolled his eyes but Sora took it in stride. “Well, you're welcome to watch another stream. I don't think I'm ready for that yet.” Sora gestured at the bed with the blue baseball bat toy and shrugged. “But, I think when I  _ am _ ready for that, it would be in private. Not sure if it'd be smart to have a first time on stream.” He laughed softly--nervously-- giving the stream a closed eyed grin and keeping his jovial nature to the forefront. He turned his attention back to whatever object he was holding when another message came in closely tailing the one before it.

_ Twilightp0rn: Came here to watch a camwhore, not see a toy store, chop chop _

Before Riku had a chance to time them out, Sora had seen it and hesitated. He looked a little rattled but simply shrugged. “Again, you're welcome to watch another stream. A company generously gave these things to me so I plan on returning their generosity with some of my own and discussing them. Nobody is forcing you to watch this stream. If you want to see some people having sex, then I can't recommend the sidebar enough; there should be recommendations based on your interests.”

_ Twilightp0rn has been issued a warning. _

Sora hadn't seen the warning but it was clear he wasn't used to targeted harassment. His fingers fumbled with the packaging on the next toy and if Riku looked closely, he was sure he could see those fingers twitching in fear. Rattled. Riku's mouse hovered over the chat for a moment before another message popped up, another string of harassment.

_ Yourfaveisalesbian: Boys shouldn't use toys past 25, it's disgusting. Get a new hobby. _

_ Lesbianfave has been issued a warning. _

_ FN_light: Dancingwater's stream is much better, he knows how to make things interesting. _

_ FN_Light has been issued a warning. _

Sora inhaled and exhaled visibly on stream. It was rough watching him try to compose himself but the anger was building. He had done nothing wrong and yet people were hopping in and slandering him. There were his regulars, of course, telling off the trolls and encouraging Sora as they had but that praise didn't penetrate deep enough. Sora's jaw worked as he mulled over every word he could say. 

“I am trying to have a nice stream. I've done nothing to you people and still, you come in here and harass and for what? Am I not allowed to have a sponsorship? Am I not allowed to be a virgin on a porn site? It wasn't an issue any of my  _ other  _ streams, so why start now?” he lamented. The blue baseball bat was dropped into his lap and rolled off of his legs as he seated to fully face the camera. “This stream is a safe place and a wind down for  _ many  _ people, myself included. I had a bad day and this isn't helping  _ anybody _ , so you know what? I'm nipping this problem in the bud. I'm sorry, but this is inexcusable and I hope Ri--my mod's door doesn't hit you on the way out.”

The words came out as vomit. Sora had tried to be tough but instantly realized what he said, regretted it. Sora had requested them be banned but how could Riku do that without it being obvious...?

_ Notyourdudebro has been timed out. _

_ Twilightp0rn has been timed out. _

_ Lesbianfave has been timed out. _

_ FN_light has been timed out. _

Riku hesitated and then clicked over to the viewers section of the chat and felt his blood run cold. At the top of the chat, above Riku's own moderation section, was a silver name with a four-pointed golden star beside it, font in a pale silver-ish blue the starkly contrasted against his dark mode's black.

_ Administrators: _

_ NumberThirteen _

Fuck. Riku dropped his face into his hands and ran them down his eyes, glancing upwards at the screen and enjoying the sting of the screen's light while he could still feel something.  _ Roxas was here and he'd been listening.  _ Riku swallowed hard and waited for the inevitable. Admins didn't generally hop into a small fry's stream so instantly, people knew he was here for crowd control. A lot of the chat erupted into an excited chaos. Immediately, Roxas had gotten pings, whispers, bombarded with emojis and questions but he didn't respond.

“He's being an aegis,” Riku mumbled to himself. Roxas was doing crowd control but why? He didn't often come into streams where Riku was moderating but there had to be a reason. Riku couldn't stop the trembling in his legs. He didn't even understand why he was feeling this way, why  _ fear _ was striking him like lightning, shocking him still and making his fingertips twitch. If Roxas had joined in, chances are he had been lurking up until that moment. And Riku knew exactly why he showed his face.

Sora had almost said his name again.

The wait for Roxas to react had been unbearable. He didn't even focus on the stream (though it seemed Sora had bucked up enough to start demonstrating a new toy, almost done with the package), knowing full well a bomb was about to drop on his head at any moment. And when the bomb  _ did _ drop, it didn't even detonate. It just sat on screen, low and cold in his belly. There had been a message in the chat bar for Riku to see specifically, a tiny little pink square in the form of a private whisper.

_ Number Thirteen: Check the forum. _

Riku frowned and glanced at the message for a long while as if he suddenly couldn't understand what he was seeing. The forum? Which one? He clicked another tab and sectioned it off to split screen across his monitor, typing out an address and logging in. He looked around, wondering what Roxas wanted him to see. There was the usual: questions and comment sections, people discussing their favorite streamers, giveaways, places for people to post their kinks and find streamers that filled the niche, and so on and so forth. Riku squinted and scrolled, eyes searching, but he found nothing.

He tabbed back to the stream and saw another whisper. 'Search him up'. So Riku tabbed to the forum and typed in SleepingKeyhole. The page loaded and he found what he was looking for. This time, his heart sunk again.

** _SleepingKeyhole Discussions_ ** _ : _

And right beneath it, under the sections where people could discuss Sora, was the topmost topic, a small fire emoji next to it. A hot topic. Touched only minutes ago by a commenter. Riku swallowed rapidly and then hovered his mouse over the topic and clicked.

** _Topic_ ** _ : Who is Riku? _

The top comment was posted days ago, by a familiar username. It showed the timestamp, their avatar, and how many forum replies they ever made. Beneath the writing section was the website's logo, like a tiny banner, and above it, Riku's eyes magnetized to the comment.

_ PeachGobbler: So...who is Riku? There's been a lot of speculation but we all got our theories, so let's hear 'em! Some of us think it could be an off-screen lover but others think it could be a person in the chat. Keyhole seemed to give a special someone a show last week and cut the stream early. He claimed he was sick, but I think we all know it was for some other reason. Drop your theories! _

People...were seriously caring about Sora just moaning his name once? People were  _ seriously _ wondering just who he was, because Sora accidentally slipped it? He chewed on his lip, reached for his wine and took a too-large gulp and beat at his chest until the liquid went to its destination. Roxas wanted him to see this because he knew it could get Sora in trouble if they found out that Riku—a mod—knew about and had friendship with a streamer. A streamer, who very  _ very _ clearly thought about him in sexual ways. Riku could've blamed it on the selfie; he was a healthy male with an attractive body, he knew that. And fair's fair since he saw—and continued to see—Sora naked.

But it was a snowball slowly rolling down the hill, ready to expand and get heavy with the weight of a simple few mistakes. What were the odds that Sora would bump into him again? Riku left home to go to school, grocery shop, carpool Roxas home, or hit the coffee shop. At the very least, Sora and he wouldn't bother with eacho--

Riku placed his forehead to the desk. He had invited Sora out to dinner and soon. He looked back at the stream and it looked like Sora was in the middle of wrapping up, his signature smile brighter in the ring light. He watched the male wiping down a toy with a cleaning wipe, explaining it's important to give your toys a cursory wipedown before washing them with hot water and proper soaps. Riku quickly whispered a message to Sora, and if the male saw it, he pretended he didn't until he was ready to sign off.

“I won't be streaming Friday since I streamed today, but I will return next Friday at the same time and place. Please take it easy, folks, and enjoy your evenings! SleepingKeyhole, signing off!”

Riku got up and went to rinse out his wine glass. He couldn't fathom drinking wine with his stomach being turned like this. He soaped up a sponge and washed it, hanging it up on a small glass rack upside down to dry. For good measure, he sunk his face into the sink and washed with cold water until he felt his nerves get dampened. He returned to his desk to see a new stream had cycled him in, some female currently trying on lingerie, his name propped to the top of the viewer list as a mod, but he wasn't watching. Instead, he glanced at his phone and saw a little inbox notification.

Swiping his phone and tapping his password, he checked the message.

_ Sora _

_ 12:36AM: What happened? _

_ Me: _

_ 12:37AM: Something not good. I'll talk to you tomorrow when I pick you up. It's important. _

There was a pause long enough for Riku to become concerned, but he decided to stow away his homework and clean up his desk before he went to bed. It wasn't until he was in the middle of brushing his teeth did his phone vibrate with a message.

_ Sora _

_ 12:58AM: Okay. I'll be ready. Sleep well if you can, Riku. _

Riku stared at the phone until the screen went black and sighed. Yeah. If he could sleep. Roxas hadn't called him to bitch him out about it so he could only assume the reasoning behind that was the fact Roxas was either out with friends and simply peeped on the stream, or he was too busy with other streams to give him the time of day. Regardless of the reason, the eruption would be soon; Riku had half a mind to skip school today but that would be too suspicious. Riku sighed and rolled to his back to watch the ceiling fan blades spinning, feeling the faint tickle of loose strands of hair against his neck.

It wasn't really  _ his  _ fault it happened like this. It wasn't like he was stalking Sora or trying to steal his identity or murder him or some shit. He just happened to find the boy cute and how was he supposed to know Sora lived in this town somewhere? The streamers, as was the reason Riku was in trouble, had anonymity and confidentiality. The only way he'd have known where Sora lived otherwise was if Sora had told him specifically, which he didn't. The phone number should have been obvious, but he didn't get that UNTIL they were in person.

Still, it wasn't as if Sora was purposely trying to sabotage Riku. Sora had read the contract, same as anybody else had when they joined. It was simply an accident that got way out of hand. Often times, viewers speculated a lot of things, like if they heard a streamer shoo away a pet or mention a special guest, the forums tended to get a little wild. People like to make a game of things. “What breed of cat do you think they have?' or 'Is the special guess Person X because they said they were traveling this week' and so on and so forth.

Riku didn't think he'd ever been the center of attention for this game.

There were only two options that ever happened. The viewers never found out and became ravenous for answers, getting a sense of familiarity and breaking through social comfort barriers without realizing in their quest to discover more about their favorite streamer, or the streamer telling them and people either dropping it with their curiosity sated, or turning that anthill into a mountain.

He didn't know which he'd be and he was afraid to find out.

Still, he rolled to his side and pulled the blankets up past his nose, the scent of his detergent in the blankets and the warmth of his breath the only thing he could grip onto tangibly. He had to try and sleep though he know it'd be fitful. Tomorrow was going to be difficult. He closed his eyes and exhaled, rubbed his cheek against his pillow until it was comfortable, and slipped slowly into a slumber.

School came and went and surprisingly, Roxas was cool. Then again, it could be because of the fact he had his girlfriend with him and asked if they could be dropped off at her house, which wasn't much farther than Roxas'. Riku obliged, Xion sitting upfront and lightly drumming on her knees, asking Riku questions about classes and making small talk which he answered to. She was always a sweetheart to him, a bubbly yet quiet girl, always the type to bring extras of anything she had so others could have it, too.

Riku had planned on staying quiet unless Roxas spoke to him but Xion had broken that rule first, saying she spent the night at Roxas' place. Xion was notorious for getting comfortable and falling asleep immediately so if Roxas hadn't called him to chew him out, then it was because she was there. He silently thanked her and hoped she had a good night.

“We finally beat that one boss, but the RNG was  _ such  _ bullshit, there's no way they had QA testers on it. The boss has bigger I-frames than we had, how is that fair?”

“It's not.” came Roxas' answer from the backseat. Riku chanced a glance in the rear view and saw Roxas with his head down, one earbud in and tapping away on his phone.

“Right? We went with the Wild Armor set but even though the internet said it was the best one to use, he kept chunking through our defenses so we had to play really risky. We just made this really gross amalgamation of a set and kept playing with it until we got him down, and get this: we didn't even get the GOOD ending, so now we have to go back and find the last collectibles and try it again.”

“Did you get the one in the Emerald Caves?” Riku asked.

“On the rocks?”

“No no, the one further back, the one by the ladder.” He felt Xion squint at him as she tried to think before her face slowly relaxed and she looked stunned.

“No!? Ugh, I  _ knew  _ something was off about that ladder! Who puts a ladder in a cave with no ways up, anyways? Man...” she slumped back in the seat and pouted, reaching for a stick of gum in the center console and replacing it with one of her own, a cinnamon for a spearmint. “Thanks, Riku!”

“Not a problem,” he said. “Don't forget the one under your bed after you beat the game.”

“Already got it!”

“There you go.” he told her, getting closer to their road. He had been too distracted by the soft music coming through the car stereo to even realize that he was being watched until he glanced up in the rear view and caught blue eyes glaring. He checked the road and jumped his eyes back, raising an eyebrow. Roxas shrugged and then tapped his phone twice, resuming his texting. Got it. They went in relative silence for the last three minutes of the car ride until he pulled up to Roxas' house, getting a one-armed hug from Xion and a finger waggle wave from Roxas with the hand holding his phone.

“Call me if you need anything,” Riku called to them.

“We will!' came Xion, “Shut up, mom,” came Roxas, their usual responses bringing a grin to Riku's face. He waited until he was one block away before he parked in front of a random vacant house and checked his phone. 1 message from Roxas. Riku felt his heart lurch and looked around nervously, as if anybody was peeping into his car, before opening it.

_ Bitch _

_ 3:44PM: He told me to tell you hi _

Riku cocked an eyebrow. Who? Sora? He typed back his question and waited but there was no instant response. He was getting the silent treatment. He'd have to try and wean his way back into Roxas' good side but that could wait until later; for now, he had to get home and get ready to pick Sora up and try and discuss how things were going to move forward from then on. He knew Sora would understand, it wasn't as if he was going to ask the impossible of him, but if Sora wanted to keep doing cam show stuff, this was detrimental for the two of them to assert some sort of barrier. He slipped his car into drive, mulling over how he'd even tell Sora about the forum.

It had only taken him a bit to get ready and he lounged around his apartment for a while trying to find something to do to whittle over the time. Roxas still hadn't sent him a text and he figured he wouldn't get one tonight, anyways, so instead, he took to texting Sora. He got a mess of jumbled sentences and constant texts explaining his nervousness, and Riku did what he could to placate the poor brunette. Truthfully, he was nervous as well. The date wasn't anything  _ romantic  _ but it still had his stomach in knots. What if Sora was completely different in person? What if he hated Riku now that Riku looked like an acceptable member of society, not three cups of java and a four hour nap the only thing sustaining him?

Still, Sora had looked terribly sick then so maybe that shyness was due to having no energy. Tonight would be solemn and awkward no matter  _ what  _ the outcome was. Riku sighed and got up for the third time to step to the full-length mirror in his bedroom and look himself over. He wore a simple yellow button up shirt with a pocket over each chest. Dark grey jeans with faded knees and black boots laced up, a belt clipped over the fronts, another hidden behind his cuffed pants. He had fought with his hair for too long and decided to give up fussing with it, instead just leaving it down and hoping it wasn't an issue. He'd bring a scrunchy regardless, but it still annoyed him.

His main issue was his glasses. He didn't really need them since he wouldn't be reading much, but he opted for contacts, the thin lenses making his eyes more green than blue. He scratched his head and shrugged, heading back to his living room to toss on a documentary while he waited. He dropped heavily to his couch with a loud creak, tossing one leg over the armrest while the other hung off the side, head propped on the other armrest while he fumbled with his phone. Answered a few texts here, caught up with emails, and then sat there watching dragonflies molting from their underwater cocoons before his phone vibrated, stunning him from his stupor.

_ Sora _

_ 5:19PM: Do you like breadsticks? _

_ Me: _

_ 5:20PM: Yeah. Are you already asking for appetizer options? _

_ Sora: _

_ 5:20PM: Blooming onions? _

_ Me: _

_ 5:22PM: You can order whatever you want you know lol _

_ Sora: _

_ 5:23PM: STUFFED. MUSH. ROOMS. _

_ Me: _

_ 5:24PM: Are we just saying appetizers? _

_ Sora: _

_ 5:25PM: I'm nervous! I'm looking over the menu. Why are breadsticks 7 munny??? _

Riku laughed at his phone. It was a high-quality restaurant after all, though now it raised the answer of why Sora was asking about appetizers. It'd be cheaper to share one so he was probably probing for interest before he ordered. Riku knew the restaurant by heart; Roxas worked there once as a dishwasher so Riku would come visit him on his breaks for dinner, buying food for them both and splitting it. He smiled down at his phone and tapped away.

_ Me: _

_ 5:27PM: If you're looking for something good, I can't recommend the cheese toast and lobster bisque enough, but if you want something more hearty, their homemade manicotti is great.  _

_Sora__  
_ _5:31PM: Oh man there’s so many options…_

Riku chuckled down at his phone and sent a message back telling him not to sweat it but it did little to assuage the brunette’s fears, and rolling his eyes, he sent back a text, saying he was coming to pick him up  _ now  _ so that Sora could look at the pictures on the menu and decide from there. He got back a mess of a sentence but there had been something that read ‘OK, almost ready’ somewhere in there.

Riku took another once-over in the mirror to brush his hair again, another quick swig of mouthwash, and he was out the door, jacket over his arm. The drive to Sora’s house wasn’t impossibly long but it was just long enough for Riku to start dreading what he’d say again... Sora was a great person, he hadn’t done anything maliciously, and it was Riku’s fault for being lenient with his personal information. Then again, if he had to refer to Sora as ‘Keyhole’, he realized he wasn’t quite sure how serious he could ever take the male. 

Still, this whole situation was pretty fucked. If Riku didn’t lose his job, Sora could lose his, or worse; face a court hearing or jail time for disobeying a contract. Riku didn’t think it’d get that far but he also didn’t have any reference material for it NOT happening. On top of that, he was inviting a cam show male to fucking  _ dinner,  _ he didn’t have any reason to really worry about anything else. He was getting closer to the house when he started getting texts, none of which he could check while he was driving. 

He managed to check over once while he was looking over during a red light and it was basically nervous babbling from Sora. He laughed softly, typed in a quick ‘calm down’ and sent it back over. It was just dinner and the poor guy was freaking out. Did he not go out to eat often? Was it because he was going out to eat with a stranger? It was just a friendly meal and a slight apology for the happenstances. Besides, Riku had already gotten the tickets, they would go to waste if they weren’t used.

He started pulling up to Sora’s house but the male was already outside and nervously picking at his pants. They were red and black plaid joggers, black and red high-top sneakers with gold laces and trimming, and his shirt was a simple black V-neck with a white collar rim. Sora was sitting on the steps of his apartment and fidgeting even before Riku pulled up beside it, and when he had, those blue eyes looked up, big as dinner plates, before that grin overtook his face.

“Hey!” Sora shouted, waving a hand and hopping up to his feet. He bounced over to the car and helped himself inside, buckling up and flashing a nervous smile over to Riku. “Wow, um…” Sora’s eyes pried up from Riku’s shirt towards his face, scratching at his cheek with a finger. “You look great. I mean, you did before...n-not the pictures, I meant at the coffee shop!” Sora’s face was turning pink and only deepened when he practically shouted, “And the pictures too, I mean, of course you looked good in them I just--”

“Sora.”  
“Yeah?”

“It’s okay. Calm down.” Riku said with a soft laugh and smile, pointing at the center console. “Have a piece of gum and relax, okay? It’s just dinner. You’re going to make  _ me  _ nervous.”

Sora’s face fell as his mouth did and he clamped a hand over it. “I didn’t mean to make you nervous!”

Another laugh, Riku shook his head. “I’m joking, you’re alright!” Sora looked over and then fumbled for a piece of gum, grabbing the cinnamon one Xion left behind, unwrapping it, stuffing the paper in his pants pocket, and chewing on it quickly. Sora was fidgeting enough for Riku to see it in his peripheral but all it did was settle his own nerves, as guilty as it made him feel. It wasn’t like he enjoyed watching the poor guy twitch and tap his feet nervously but it made Riku’s own worries seem so small in comparison.

“So…” Riku said, catching the way that head snapped up. “We’ll get a booth in the back. I don’t expect people to eavesdrop but I know you’d probably appreciate the privacy.”

“What do you mean?”

“You’ve shown your face, you’re getting popular. I don’t think anybody would recognize you since it’s a pretty small place but, if someone  _ did  _ notice you…”

Sora stared at him and then the notion clicked in his head. “I’m...I’m  _ not  _ famous, Riku,” he said, brushing a hand through his wild hair, “I just…. _ do things  _ on camera, that doesn’t really mean anything to people. Does it?”

Riku paused, flicking a glance over. “You really don’t know?” He chewed at the inside of his cheek and shrugged, tapping a hand on the steering wheel. “You might think it’s just ‘doing stuff’ on camera, but you got a following. In fact, that’s what I wanted to talk to you about while we’re here.”

“Alright,” Sora said, fumbling with his fingers in his lap. “Is it...because of what I said, on stream? B-Because it was an accident, and I owe you and apology so--”

“Hey, it’s okay. Let’s wait until we get some food in us and then we can talk stuff over, alright? Besides, there’s something you need to see.”

Sora nodded and faced forward, remaining quiet for the rest of the trip outside of nervous hums and the occasional worded answer. Riku tried not to frown; Sora was dreading whatever was coming despite it probably not being serious if they caught it quickly enough. Still, by the time they made it to the bistro, Sora seemed a bit more chipper, glancing over the front with wide eyes.

“Wow!” he giggled, looking up at the restaurant. It had black glass windows and a rustic design, the sign neon and glowing dimly in the twilight sky. There were tables outside where people were already eating and sipping wines. Sora took his phone out and snapped a quick picture of the front before Riku ushered him inside, holding the door. Sora looked up at him and laughed softly, thanking him and stepping inside.

The inside was just as charming. Dark red wallpapers with shiny gold trimming, circular tables lined one side of the restaurant and were covered in a faded grey cloth. Candles sat in the center of each table, wine glasses surrounding every chair’s dining space. Beside each glass were wrapped silk napkins in various shapes, ranging from swans, roses, little boats, and even bats. Sora’s head looked around in wonder and Riku tried to bite back a smile.

“Two, please,” Riku said to a waiter Sora hadn’t even seen, too distracted by the fairy lights strung up around the ceiling. The waiter led them to a booth as per Riku’s request and they both sat down across from each other. Sora reached for a menu and the waiter asked for drinks.

“Just a lemon water, please,” Sora requested.

“Red wine for me, please,” Riku said, reaching for his own menu as the waiter stepped away. Sora opened the menu but he was already distracted, looking around at the restaurant with such awe. It was dim in the bistro, a comfortable sort of darkness. There was just enough lighting from every table with a small chandelier over each and fairy lights of gold across the ceiling and trailing down the walls. 

“So…?” Sora asked, finger trailing down the menu but not really seeing it. “If I can ask. What did your date ditch you?”

“My what?” Riku looked up and blinked and then parted his lips in an ‘oh’. “It wasn’t  _ that  _ kind of date, was an old friend coming through town, but something came up so they had to reschedule. Nothing personal, really. I normally wouldn’t care but you need to get a reservation for this place and you can’t refund your tickets. I was just going to go myself otherwise as a little reward for my exams.”

“Oh yeah, how did that go?”

“Not sure, hopefully good,” he said, watching the waiter return with their drinks. They both thanked the man and placed their orders. One order of stuffed mushrooms to share, and two orders of manicotti. Once the waiter was out of earshot, Riku sighed and shifted his position.

“Look, I’m not...I’m not here to treat you like a child and scold you but there was a ‘breach of privacy’ in us exchanging names and numbers. Pictures. Um.” Riku reached a hand to hold his hair back and grip it nervously. “That was on me, not you. I sent you my name, my pictures, exchanged numbers just as you did. So, it’s on  _ me _ , but…” 

“Am I in trouble?” Sora asked quietly, looking at the lemon in his drink. Riku shook his head.

“No, you’re not. If anything, I am. I…” He shimmied a little in his seat and sighed. “I...enjoy watching you stream and it’s not just because it’s sexual. You got this great personality, you light up the room. I’ve never really pursued a friendship with a streamer, it was always strictly business. I join, I mod, they finish, I go to the next stream. No more no less.” He gripped his wine glass delicately but couldn’t find the will to sip it. “I don’t admittedly know why I started getting friendly with you. If I’m being honest, I was waiting for the inevitable crash and burn.”

“Wow,  _ real nice,  _ Riku,” Sora pouted, able to drink his own beverage. But he was smiling over the dripping glass, watching the ice float back to the top when he set it down. “Honestly? I was, too. Streaming was a last ditch effort for me to make ends meet. I was stupid to start up on a Friday but like I said, I use my friend’s place to do so. They’re only not home on the weekends because they go out with friends.”

Sora shrugged, reaching for a napkin to spit out his gum and tucking it out of sight on the table. “I’d done some research beforehand on the streams so I know the big names stream on weekends. I thought I’d be a one and done, you know? But...I’m glad I wasn’t. Every donation has been a lifesaver and every time I stream I actually feel  _ useful,  _ I feel  _ happy.  _ It’s like...I don’t know.” Sora glanced down at the table and frowned, shaking his bangs from his eyes though it didn’t last more than a few seconds. “I don’t feel popular or famous or anything, I just feel like I’m playing a game. There’s adrenaline and excitement, I like interacting with the viewers and letting loose. I’ve never really been like that.”

He crossed his arms and leaned forward a little, though his expression looked dejected. “I feel like a fraud, if I’m being honest. Like, once I turned on the lights and get the stream up and running, another person takes over. People like that person and that’s fine. I’d rather they like him than the real me.”

“You’re not a fraud,” Riku said, “There’s something called a ‘stream persona’. A lot of streamers completely change when they’re live because that’s what gets viewers. Besides,” he said, finally bringing his glass to hips lips, “I like the real you. Haven’t known him long but he’s never done me wrong.”

Sora simply gawked at him for a long minute. Those stunned blue eyes only broke their concentration when the waiter returned with two plates and two delicate, detailed forks. They thanked the waited again and started on their meals. They ate a few bites before resuming their conversation.

“Here,” Riku said, taking his phone out and tapping away for a bit before sending it over to Sora. The forum. Sora looked at it, then looked up and pointed at himself. A forum for...him?  _ About  _ him? He frowned, and then caught sight of what Riku had mostly likely wanted him to see. There was a hyperlink a completely different colored with a border around it: it had been clicked, the only thread.

_ Who is Riku? _

Sora blinked at it, opened it, scrolled and read just enough. The further he read, the more his eyebrows scrunched and the more pained he looked. Before Sora could even say anything, Riku tapped his glass with a fingernail to make the male raise his head.

“I’m not upset by it. I’m just as shocked by it as you are. But when you make a name for yourself online, people get so interested in breaking you. They might not realize it, but it happens, time and time again. Privacy gets shattered, personal space gets invaded, people get greedy and try and learn everything they can about you. You…” Riku looked around, saw nobody in earshot. “You moaned my name,” he said quietly, “So people obviously know this isn’t a pet or anything like that, they know it’s a person. Their imagination is controlling the helm, now.”

Sora looked up and then back down. “But...why would they care? I’ve seen other streamers moan names and stuff for donations so…?”

Riku shrugged. “Makes no sense, right? But that’s not really the issue. The issue is...this.” He took his phone and tapped away once more, turning it back and giving it to Sora once again. Sora looked at it and raised an eyebrow. “Yeah, they’re an admin. They show up in almost all of my streams.”

“What?”

Sora blinked. “You didn’t know? Usually for a second but once they log out, another viewer joins their place.”

“What?” Riku repeated. Was Roxas fucking  _ frosting  _ the stream? It’d make sense; Roxas was an admin--any time that symbol was shown, most viewers acted like precious angels. If he was under an incognito name...that would explain how Roxas knew about the whole Riku’s name thing. “Do you remember the username?”

“Mmm. No. I’m sure if I saw it again I’d know what it was. Sorry.” Sora poked at his food and took another bite, carefully tucking it into his cheek before continuing. “Why, what’s wrong?”

Riku hummed, “He’s...basically my boss. I know him personally. Issue is, he heard you say my name and I’m probably in a lot of hot water. He hoped it’d be swept under the rug but with the forum exploding into a mystery they feel the need to solve, it just brought it back into the spotlight.” Riku took a bite of his own food and wiped his mouth with a napkin before continuing. “The issue is that when you and I both got the job, we signed a contractual agreement and on it, there was a promise of privacy. You knowing my name and I, yours, meant that we both went against the contract.”

Sora’s face fell and he shirked into himself a little, sinking down into his arms. “Riku...it was an accident, I didn’t mean--”

Riku raised a hand. “We’re both at fault. I should have said no and stopped it but I didn’t. Like I said, I  _ wanted  _ to befriend you. I still do, that’s why I’m here. I want you to keep your job and I want me to keep mine. We can still text, talk, email and see each other, we just have to keep it a secret.” Riku frowned. “It’s not ideal, I know, we’re both adults but…”

Sora shook his head, took another drink. Looked around for the perfect mushroom on the platter before speaking. “I know. I’m not upset, Riku, honest. I’m actually really glad you still want to be my friend.”

“Why wouldn’t I? It was an accident, no harm done.”

Nodding, Sora relaxed a little bit, looking up at Riku. “So...what do we do now? People aren’t going to let it go and I can’t just say you’re a friend or a former lover.” Riku shrugged at that, took another long swig of wine with a sigh.

“I’d say just ignore it. People will hopefully get bored eventually, and if they don’t? Well, that’s on them. You got a show to run.They came to see you, not me.”

“Maybe.” Sora poked at his food, appetite clearly dashed though he had a good half of it left. His cheeks tinged pink. “I think...people would love to see you, though.”

A silver eyebrow raised. “Wait, wait, wait...are you suggesting I do cam shows?”

“No!” Sora squeaked, “I-I mean, like, if YOU want to, then…” He put his fork down onto the table and then propped his head on his chin. “I just think ...y'know, you got a good body and you got piercings and they’re popular...and--if you wanted, y’know, maybe one day we could ...collaborate. Or something. If...you wanted.”

Riku blinked. “...Are you insinuating I become a camboy so we could screw?”

Sora’s mouth opened and shut and he turned his head away. “I mean...no, not like that, I just--I mean, since you already know me in person, if we cammed together, then you wouldn’t get in trouble as a mod, right?” Sora’s face fell. “I don’t think I’ll keep my numbers long, anyways, people were really upset last stream but... they’re right. Just using toys every stream is bound to get stale.” Sora chewed on his bottom lip and focused hard on the table. “I wasn’t...implying that you had to sleep with me or anything but I do need to start finding something else to do.”

He stretched his hands out a little and then reached for his fork again, using it as a distraction to poke at the wrinkled mushrooms. “I was considering a collaboration, or finding a new game to play, something to keep the chat engaged. Often times, the streamers don’t even talk to their viewers, they just do what they want to do to get off, collect the money, and run. That’s not me. I want people to have fun! I want people to enjoy watching as much as I enjoy playing.” He smiled down at the fork and it was as genuine as every smile Riku had ever seen on stream. Confident, literal sunshine, plastered across a freckled nose and engulfing the blue eyes in a wave of sparkles, glittering like sunlight across an ocean wave. 

“I think the one thing I want to be is a streamer that makes it fun for everybody. Not just them, y’know, taking care of themselves, but  _ wanting  _ to come back. I’m not here to become popular or famous or whatever else, I just want people to go to sleep with a smile on their face. I want people to look forward to the next week’s stream, to look forward to the days that lead up to it.”

Riku placed his forearms on the table and rested his hands at the elbows. “That’s admirable of you. Most people  _ do  _ just stream for the money or to get off. Wanting to get a devoted fanbase it a difficult task but I think you could do it.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, I do. So many people flocked to your stream despite you being new, and it’s because of your personality. You’re warm and bubbly, and I honestly think that if you could--”

Sora jolted when his phone on the table started ringing. He looked up at Riku who nodded, taking a sip of his wine. Sora reached for the phone and frowned down at the name. Ven? He never called him unless he hadn’t answered texts, but Sora hadn’t gotten any from him in days. “Hello?”

Sora looked at Riku and then down at the table with wide eyes, face paling. “No...I’m not home, I’m out...okay? Did you go inside?”

Riku mouthed ‘what’s wrong?’ and Sora shook his head, raising a finger to indicate he needed a minute. His breath came quickly and he started trembling, eyes unfocused. “Mhm. Did you call the cops? No, I-I left a little over an hour ago and it was--okay. Y-Yeah, uhm, I’ll be right there as soon as I can, I’m--yeah. Yeah. Okay. Thanks Ven, I’m--” Sora exhaled, wiped at an eye that started to overflow. Riku was already slipping his coat on as Sora nodded. “Okay. Be right there.”

Sora hung up the phone and then exhaled a shaking breath. “My front door is wide open...Ven says it looked like someone kicked it off its hinges. He thinks my apartment got robbed.”

Riku’s mouth dropped at the news but he nodded quickly, looked around for a waiter and flagged one down with a hand movement. The waiter came and Riku slipped him a credit card, explaining they had to leave and boxes wouldn’t be necessary. In that time, Riku handed Sora his glass of wine and told him to take a sip but Sora declined, instead opting to down his own lemon water.

“I’m okay, I’m...I’m just rattled. Ven said he called the cops and he’s waiting at my place, they’re going to want me there as soon as possible.” he said. Riku nodded again, watched Sora tremble.

“Did you have anybody else in the house with you?”

“No, I didn’t,” Sora said, taking his phone out to text. “I locked the door when I left, I made sure of it, I just--”

“Hey, look at me.” Riku put his hands on Sora’s shoulders and gave a gentle shake. “We’re going to head to your house and make sure everything’s alright. Okay? We’ll take care of everything. Ven’s smart by not going into your house in case the robber is still there, provided they  _ are,  _ but even so, it’s a crime scene right now.” Sora looked up with watering eyes and Riku frowned. This was supposed to be a nice evening and it was one bombshell on top of the next. “I’ll take the back roads and speed a little, alright? Not the safest of options but I’ll get you home quickly, we can assess your house.”

Sora’s eyes widened. Riku couldn’t see that! He shook his head quickly, hoped the dilapidated outside of his house didn’t give Riku too big an impression of its horrendous condition. “You don’t need to do that, I just--!”

The waiter came by and provided Riku’s card and a pen, which he took and signed across the receipt, handing it back. “Come on, let’s go.”

Sora frowned but followed suit, gripping at his own arms as they headed to the parking lot. Even as they drove, Riku was silent, Sora reaching for a piece of gum but deciding against it. He was trembling and picking at his pants, constantly checking his phone. Ven hadn’t said anything and though he texted Vanitas, unsurprisingly, there wasn’t a reply. He didn’t have many belongings, and those he had he could part with at least.

The drive, as Riku said, was down back roads and he  _ had  _ sped, though Sora wasn’t the least bit concerned about that. Every road that was familiar was making Sora’s stomach twist into knots, and the moment he saw his street sign, he felt sick. He hoped the manicotti was just as good coming up because he felt it was about to make a reappearance. Riku had barely pulled up against the curb before Sora tore out of the still-moving car, rushing up to the house.

Ven was there and reached for his sleeve but Sora had already bolted inside, looking at his house. The usual mess was there, his futon, his couch, his wilted plants. Sora started shuffling through the mess of books on the floor, on his trash can that had been tipped over, his fridge door cracked but shut. Someone had definitely ransacked the place.

Sora was sifting through some trash on the floor when he heard footsteps beside him and turned to see Riku, Ven right behind him. 

“Sora!” They said in unison.

“You’re not supposed to be in here!” Ven urged. 

“What do you need to find?” Riku suggested. Ven turned to look at him with a curious eyebrow. 

“Who’re you?” Ven asked, but Riku ignored him, sifting through the trash on the floor. He wasn’t sure what he was looking for, but Sora flashed him a thankful grin. “Look for a blue box with a heart on it,” he said, “Nothing else really matters.”

“Okay,” Riku said, looking through the trash as Sora got up and peered through the books on the floor. Ven looked around the apartment and then walked to the bathroom to search. For a while there was only the sound of trash being shuffled (which Riku was putting back into the trash can) and Ven searching cupboards in the bathroom, now moving to the kitchen. Sora was tossing books around, searching under the couch and between the cushions.

Riku had moved to the plant and paused, seeing dirt on the floor. He started shoveling his hand into the dirt of the pot and shoved it to the side. Ven came over to see what he was doing when his face fell.

“Sora?”

“What?”

“He found it…”

Sora dashed over and slipped on the wooden floor before looking into Riku’s dirty hands. Inside was a small wooden box, a blue-painted box with a yellow heart ending in curls. Sora snatched the box quickly and cracked it open, hands shaking and heart hammering. “Please--” he said, fumbling with the latch before it sprang open. The lid came off and clattered to the ground and inside--

Was nothing.

He sunk to his knees on the floor and curled into a ball, clutching at the box against his stomach and sobbing brokenly. Ven and Riku exchanged a worried glance and they were both at his side, asking what was wrong. Sora couldn’t manage the words. He was sobbing loudly, head bowed to the wet wood, tears staining his cheeks and the old hardwood. Ven looked back at the door and moved towards the police car that had just pulled up while Riku stayed by Sora’s side.

“Sora, what’s wrong, what’s missing?” he asked. Sora was inhaling so hard he was simply coughing, unable to see anything through his tears.

“The donations,” he managed quietly, the words broken and destroyed in his wrecked throat. “It’s all gone…!”

Riku frowned, looked at the little wooden box. He kept his money in that but not at the bank? How did anybody know where the money was kept? “C’mon,” he said quietly. “Let’s talk to the police and then we can keep searching. Maybe they didn’t take all of it?”

Sora remained on the floor for a long while. Looking back at the door, Ven was talking to the police and gesturing towards the house. Frowning, Riku glanced down at Sora and then leaned forward to hold him in a tight hug. “It’s okay,” he said quietly, “It’s okay. We’ll get this figured out.”

“No, w-we won’t! I need--I needed that money for m-my mom!”

“Sora, listen, you’re hysterical. You’re valid for feeling that way but you need to take a few deep breaths and try and calm down, alright? The cops are here to help you and so are me and your friend, okay? You’re not alone, we’re going to help you.”

“No, you c-can’t! I had tried to s-save it all so she could move out, and now it’s all g-gone...it’s gone, Riku!” Sora’s eyes scrunched and squeezed shut, a fresh wave of tears. “I lost everything…!”

Riku glanced around at the apartment. It was decimated by garbage, items tossed around. Someone knew Sora hid his money in a box, had searched for it. Sora didn’t quite have many belongings so the search was limited to where it could be. Still, that begged the question: who stole the money? Sora didn’t have internet at home so it’s not like he could be doxxed, that would be his friend’s place more often than not.

It was only when a police officer stood inside did Riku stand up to greet him and explain the situation. Sora took a while to relinquish the box but after being told they’d check it for fingerprints, Sora gave it up. While the officers checked the apartment for damage, Riku sat on the couch with Sora, an arm around his shoulder, letting the poor man cry. There was nothing he could say; the damage had been done. All he could do was let Sora cry. Giving Sora his jacket and slipping it over Sora’s shoulders, he got up and went to talk to Ven for a few minutes as the cops swept the apartment.

“How’s he holding up?” Ven asked outside, having still been questioned by a police officer who was scrawling into a notepad.

“He said there was money in that box and it’s gone. Said he’d been saving for a while.” He didn’t know if Sora’s friend, Ven, knew, wasn’t about to tell him the truth. But Ven’s face sunk regardless.

“I had a feeling. He’s always had all of his money squirreled away, only kept a little cash on hand even when we were kids. His stepdad used to take it from him, so if he pretended it was all he had--if he kept the main amount hidden--then his stepdad would still get money and Sora wouldn’t be broke. It’s how he got this place, admittedly.”

Riku scuffed at his shoe a little. Sora’s bank had declined his card prior, was that what Sora had for ‘cash on hand’? He must’ve made a face because Ven cleared his throat.

“So, who are you?”

“Oh, sorry. I’m Riku.”

“Riku.” Ven looked at him for a minute. “Sora’s never told me about you.”

“I’m a...new friend. We have a friend in common.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah, I-I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to not tell you, it just--”

Ven laughed and ran fingers through blond spikes, “No, it’s fine, I get it. It’s...it’s rough right now. Sora’s a good kid but man, he only ever gets bad luck. Sweetest guy in the world and the world just spits back at him.”

Riku nodded. “Yeah.”

Ven nodded back, drifting off in thought. “I’ll be right back, I gotta call my housemate, do you mind staying with Sora?”

“Not at all.”

“Thanks. Be right back.” Ven reached into his pocket and started typing a number. Riku turned back to the house. Sora was still on the couch and huddled into a ball, holding Riku’s jacket tight to his shoulders. He didn’t even react when Riku sat back down right next to him and looked over.

“Hey,” he said quietly. “Um. I know it’s a little forward, but, grab some clothes. I’d like you to stay at my place tonight.”

Sora looked up slowly. He blinked back some tears until his vision came back to him and swallowed a few times before he could answer. “What?”

“Well, your door is kicked down, for one. And two, they could come back. I’d rather you not have to sleep with that fear in mind. So come stay at my place for the night. I don’t have a guest room or anything but I have a pull-out couch, or the couch itself. Not the best place to sleep but it’s…”

“Better than this shithole?” Sora said dejectedly, looking down at the floor. “I know. Anything is better than some blankets on the floor.” Sora looked around at the mess on the floor and sighed, scrubbing at the tears clinging to his lashes. He got up without a word and went to grab a plastic trash bag, tucking in some clothes quickly before tying the little bag shut with an aggressive tug.

The police didn’t stay much longer, and after getting testimonies and sweeping for anything dangerous left behind, they assured Sora they’d ‘call him’, helping at least to put the door back on its hinges. Sora looked around the apartment one last time, heaved a sigh, and stepped outside without a word. Riku let him go, turning to look at the mess left behind. Sora really didn’t deserve this.

He headed to the car after shutting and locking the home door. Sora lived in a shithole, that was true, but it wasn’t his fault. He imagined the apartment was kept as clean as possible, homely, though seeing it in ruins had hurt Riku. Books thrown around, dirt shoveled from the plant, trash to the floor. Disrespected.

Sora headed into the car when it was unlocked, but within seconds of turning the car on, Sora broke down again. The brunette probably didn’t even realize he was dabbing his eyes with Riku’s coat but he didn’t mind. Riku turned the music on low, pulled back from the curb, and started the drive home in silence, the only noise was the soft guitar from the stereo and Sora’s stuttered breaths.

Riku pulled into the driveway with a red-eyed Sora, sniffling and an absolute mess. Riku helped him out of the car door and led him up the front steps, holding the bag of clothes. He unlocked the door and helped Sora inside, flicking on the light. Riku’s living room was clean. His computer tucked to the corner on a desk, his TV and entertainment center, his couch, spacious room. Sora stepped inside and just loitered in the center of the room and looked around.

“Do you want to freshen up in the bathroom?” Riku asked. Sora nodded. “Okay, this way.” He led Sora through a door on the back side of the living room, leading him into the door on the right rather than the left. His bedroom and bathroom. The bathroom wasn’t anything too extravagant. A white sink with a marble-like texture, a split mirror that doubled as a medicine cabinet. The toilet was covered with a maroon fuzzy covering, a floor mat and bath mat matching it. The wallpaper as well was a simple maroon with tiny gold-accented swirls and patterns, and though Sora couldn't see the shower behind the brown curtain covering it, it looked to be average-sized. The bathroom had a faint apple scent and he wondered if it was residual shampoo or maybe a candle. He reached for a tissue.

“Um..do you mind if I shower?” Sora asked.

“No, not at all! I need to pick up more shampoo but you should have enough. Uh...lemme go grab you a towel, hold on.” Riku headed to the kitchen and went to the drier, grabbing out a fresh towel after some fishing around for one. He went to give it to Sora who awkwardly handed him back his jacket.

“Um...sorry, I didn’t...I got snot on it.” Sora said sheepishly. Riku laughed.

“It’s alright. I had to clean it anyways.” he said, exchanging it for a green towel. “You take a shower, I’ll be in the living room. If you need anything, just holler, okay?”

“Yeah,” Sora said, nodding and still shaky when he breathed. “Yeah. Thanks, Riku. For everything.”

“Don’t thank me. You’d do the same, I’m sure,” he said, shutting the door behind him and hearing the water turn on seconds later. He forgot to tell Sora how to use the shower but he was sure he could figure it out. Riku tossed the jacket in the wash and made for the kitchen counter, reaching for a box of tea in the cupboards. He started boiling water and leaned back against the counter, running his hand through his hair. “What a fucking mess.” he murmured.

He busied himself with making the tea and hadn’t realized he got lost in his thoughts. Didn’t hear the water shut off. He frowned, crossed his arms as the tea steeped. Sora didn’t have internet at home, used a friend’s spare room for streaming, stayed in a bad house, and now with no money he had little to live for. Sora was understandably collapsing.

He brought the tea cups out on a small tray with sugar (he ran out of milk, he’d have to fix that) and jolted when he saw Sora sitting awkwardly on the couch, holding his feet together and chewing at a fingernail. Riku tried to stop his jolting heart and came closer, setting the tray down on the coffee table.

“You feel a little better?” he asked. Sora nodded, still pale in the face.

“Yeah, I do. I’m not gonna be over what happened but...I still had a good night before then. Sorry it got cut short.” Sora deflated, curling up close into himself in a little ball. Riku shook his head.

“Don’t apologize. We both had dinner, we talked. I’m just...admittedly, I’m glad you weren’t home. If the robber had a weapon or something, you might not be here right now.”

Sora nodded, reached for his tea cup and started stirring in an excess of sugar. “Yeah, probably not. Small miracles, I guess.” he said. He blew quietly on his cup while Riku made his own to taste.

“Um.” Riku scratched at the back of his head, the hand stirring his cup freezing. “You don’t...need to live there.”

“What?” Sora looked up with a blink.

“I mean…” He exhaled. “I only have the one room but you can crash here until we find you a new place. And this is a duplex, you could probably move in next door. I’d have to talk to my brother since he owns the place but--”

“You have a brother?”

Riku laughed. “I have two. I’m a triplet.”

“No fucking way.”

Riku’s laugh deepened to something louder, his hand covering his mouth a little. “Oh, when you say you have a brother, everybody has fun, but when I do, you call me a liar?”

“I’m not--” Sora snorted, “Shut up!” He reached a foot over to kick at Riku who laughed again. “I meant about you being a triplet. That’s…”

“Rare?”

“Very.”

“Yeah, well,” Riku chanced a sip at his tea and flinched from the heat. “My little brother owns this place, he rented it out to me. I’m sure he could rent the other half out to you if you wanted, I could talk to him.”

“Oh, I...I’d like that but I can’t afford it. I could barely afford my other apartment.” Sora’s head dropped. “I mean...if ‘SleepingKeyhole’ keeps doing alright, then I might have a chance, but...if it doesn’t, I’m out of a job. I don’t have any special skills, I did poorly in high school so college is off the table, and even if it  _ was  _ I don’t have the cash to afford it. I’m stuck.”

Riku’s fingers rubbed the outside of his cup and he sighed. “Well...we’ll figure it out. For now, we’re going to get you back on your feet, start saving you up some money for your mom, and get you settled.”

“Riku…”

“Can I ask why you weren’t saving your cash in the bank?”

Sora frowned, his head dropped. “I...still share an account with my mother. I can’t put money in because my stepdad will find out. So, I figured, if I withdrew it all from my friend’s savings account they made for me and kept it hidden then…” he exhaled hard, tears threatening to well back up. “I’m scared. My mom is in a really shitty situation and I thought I could help her.” Sora laughed bitterly, “My fucking fault for that.”

“Hey,” Riku’s voice was stern, “It was an honest mistake. You tried to help and shitty people ruined it for you. How much did you lose?”

“Not much. Maybe...five hundred Munny? A little more.” 

“Okay,” Riku said, reaching for his phone.

“The hell are you doing?” Sora said, putting down his cup and jumping up to turn the phone off, but Riku stood up, using his height as an advantage while he typed away. Then he simply pocketed it and turned his attention to his computer. He moved the mouse to wake it up and then opened a web browser incognito until a familiar site showed up.

Riku was on Sora’s streaming page. As Riku tabbed to the chat, Sora got to see the administration control panel moderators had. And his heart plummeted.

_ WaytotheDawn Donated: 500 Munny _

“Take it back,” Sora said in little more than a whisper, throat thoroughly wrecked and making him squeak. “Riku, take the donation back. I swear, you have to, I can’t accept this, I can’t--!”

“Sora.” He turned in the chair to face him, reaching back to turn the screen off. “No. I get an actual constant paycheck with this job, YOU don’t. Take the munny.”

“I--” Sora gaped up at him in absolute awe. Riku just smiled softly.

“Look, I’m caught up on bills, I just went food shopping, and rent is taken care of. Missing one paycheck won’t kill me.”

“But--” Sora stared at the computer screen and saw his black reflection there. And then those eyes narrowed and shut as tears began to spill again. Riku put his cup down quickly and rushed back to his side, shushing him gently and patting his back. He hadn’t meant to make him cry, but now there was nothing he could do. Sora reached up to clutch at his shoulders and probably murmured thank you a few times, Riku couldn’t make the words out.

He gave him time to cry and settle before giving him back his tea cup and telling him to drink. Sora did, the drink now cool enough, practically downing it all in a few sips. Riku left and returned with two bowls of ice cream, tossing on a movie while he fished for some blankets and pillows, the two sitting up on the couch with the recliners popped up, eating ice cream on separate sides of the couch and making small talk.

Sora eventually calmed down enough, distracted about the cartoon movie with two dogs eating spaghetti to really focus on today’s events. It was nice to glance over and see those blue eyes, still a little puffy from crying, wide and wondrous as he watched the familiar film. He looked...normal. Any other young adult just relaxing, lounging and eating ice cream. A plaid fleece rucked up to his chin, body contorted into a ball with legs leaning on one side, mouthing the words he remembered.

It was almost…

“Cute.”

“Huh?” Sora blinked and then slowly tore his eyes from the TV. “Didja say something?”

“No,” Riku lied, “I didn’t.” Sora blinked, gave him a small smile with an ‘okay’ and turned his attention back to the movie. Maybe they were both idiots that said things out loud. Riku took another bite of ice cream, wishing the blue of it was as bright as those eyes, enraptured by a film. Shiny with grateful tears. 

Riku made out the couch for Sora, per Sora’s request, giving him the extra blankets and pillows and leaving the little lamp on by his computer so the room wasn’t completely dark. Riku made a show of locking the front door and double checking the windows before looking at Sora and telling him good night. Sora replied the same, scooting under the covers.

“Thank you again, Riku.”

“No problem,” Riku said, smiling. “Bathroom’s on the right, my room’s on the left. Knock if you need anything, okay?”

“Okay. Good night.”

“Good night.” Riku headed to the bathroom to brush his teeth and generally get ready for the night before heading into his room. He shimmied off his clothes and tossed them in a full hamper, slipping into nothing but underwear and clean, thin pajama bottoms. He flicked on his ceiling fan and then lay on top of the blankets. Sora…was in his  _ house,  _ on his  _ couch.  _ He didn’t know how to process this information, but he was glad Sora had streamed yesterday night. He probably wouldn’t on Friday due to the robbery.

He chewed on his bottom lip and sighed, brushing fingers through his hair as he watched the fan blades spin by. Sora had gotten robbed and lost everything. He wondered, briefly, if there was anything else that was missing Sora didn’t realize. Maybe a photobook or some sort of jewelry. Anything of substance. He’d ask tomorrow, when Sora was fully calmed down. He shut his eyes and exhaled slowly, beginning his countdown of breaths to sleep.

He had only made it to fourteen when there was a creak in the hallway, slow, cautious, and then a gentle knock. Riku blinked and then rolled to his side. “Come in.”

The door opened slowly, Sora’s silhouette in the darkness of the room. He looked to be holding a blanket. “Um…” He shuffled in place like a nervous child. “I...don’t want to sleep in the living room. I can sleep on the floor, I just--my entire apartment was a living room, s-so…”

Riku exhaled. “I get it. Come on, get the other side.”

“Uh.”

“It’s fine, my bed’s big enough for two.” he said, slapping the left side. “I tend to sleep on the edge anyways.” he said. Sora hesitated and then shuffled closer to lay on the bed. Sora was laying flat on his back when he got comfortable and Riku stifled a laugh, rolling over to face him.

“Sora, it’s a sleepover. Take a breath. It’s just a bed.”

“I know, but...I feel weird.”

“I can take the couch if--”

“No!” Sora all but shouted, turning his head to face him. Riku could barely make out the eyes in the dark. “No, I just...I haven’t slept in a bed with someone since I was a kid.”

“I get it,” Riku said, rolling back over to flick on his tiny lamp on his bedside table and then turning to face Sora again. Sora’s eyes jumped down to Riku’s chest and back up, much too quickly, but not quick enough. Riku cocked an eyebrow and Sora pressed a hand to his mouth. This time, Riku did laugh, sitting up to face Sora.

“Sora. I sent you a nude, I don’t care if you stare.” he said. Sora’s face had turned red and he could only sit up in utter shame, turning his head away despite facing Riku.

“I’m sorry, I just--it was rude.” he said. Riku rolled his eyes. 

“It wasn’t.” he said, looking down at himself. “What is it?” he asked.

“Um. I don’t--it’s just…” Sora ran a hand down his face with an exaggerated sigh. “I think the piercings are...cool.”

“Oh.” Riku looked down at one, touched it, spun it a little between nimble fingers. “I like them too, it’s why I got them. The others...well, I lost a bet.” he said. Sora snorted and laughed softly. 

“Can I touch it?”

“Sure,” Riku said, puffing his chest a little for Sora to get a clear trail. He reached forward tentatively and touched the metal, making a small sound.

“It’s....cold.”

“Yep.”

“I thought it’d be warm since it touches your chest,” he said, poking at the round cap of the barbell. Sora drew his hand back as if burned, holding his wrist for good measure. Riku just shrugged.

“Sometimes they are, if I’m sick or outside. They’re cold otherwise.”

Sora’s mouth gaped like a fish a few times. “Even…?” He pointed to the bed. Riku choked out a laugh and shook his head.

“No, not those, they got, uhm...cushioning, I guess.” Sora joined in the laughter. The two boys just laughed until they decided sleep would benefit them, sliding into their respective spots. Riku had fallen asleep rather quickly, even with a lamp lighting the room. Sora couldn’t. He tried, he was exhausted, but he was just unable to. He assumed it was the shock from the adrenaline of today still taking its hold of him. 

Every time he opened his eyes, Riku’s face was there, eyes closed, some silver hair tossed sloppily across his face. Sora couldn’t help but stare. He swallowed hard and carefully reached a hand forward. He couldn’t help himself, his fingers were trailing closer to that face, and with a gentle touch, Sora brushed the hair from Riku’s face. It was soft and silky, as smooth as it looked. Sora smiled a little to himself and sighed.

“Good night, Riku.” he said, closing his eyes and cuddling close into his blanket tucked close to his mouth. 


	5. Triumph and Tribulations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A visitor at the door spells trouble for Riku and Sora.  
Deciding how to move forward, Riku brings Sora to a sex toy shop to try and find something new, and Sora returns home with a bag full of goodies and a chest full of courage.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, everyone, apologies for this slow chapter; between the virus sweeping the world, being an American, and struggling with my own health issues and self-employment knocking me on my ass, it's been hard to get words out.
> 
> This chapter absolutely didn't go the way I wanted it to but after deleting a total of 9k and trying to rewrite this thing every time I opened the document, I figured it was good enough to post. I might go back and clean things up/make it pretty in the future but for now it's good enough.
> 
> I want to thank everybody for their patience and kind comments regarding this fic and the smaller one I've put out over the months trying to get my mojo back. It means a lot to have encouragement.
> 
> ((Also since I know folks will ask, no, Sora's never met Aqua or Terra and no, Ven doesn't know what they do in their personal life outside of the theater))
> 
> @Vanplitwo on Twitter

Morning came and Sora stretched under the covers, rolling to his side with a yawn and fumbling for his phone before he swiped at open air instead of the pinewood floor he was accustomed to. He jolted to awareness, eyes snapping open and realizing he was staring at beige paint and a curtained-off window, face buried in dark blankets. This wasn’t his home. The events of yesterday came flooding back and he felt his heart hammering in his chest. Right...he was at  _ Riku’s house.  _ The thought should have brought him comfort but it didn’t; in fact, now that he knew where he was and who was here, his body was tensing up.

Carefully, he looked over his shoulder and found the bed to be empty. It should have been a relief but at the same time he felt awful. He was in a house that felt safe and suddenly he felt so vulnerable. He woke up and got out of bed slowly, grabbing a handful of clothes from his bag and heading to the bathroom.

The house was cold and save for a faint ticking clock and what sounded like a refrigerator humming, it was silent. Sora headed to the bathroom and got ready for the day, putting his dirty clothes in a hamper in the kitchen’s laundry section before stepping into it properly. Everything was neat and clean, some small sprinkles of sugar left on the counter by the coffee pot but otherwise tidied up. He glanced upwards at the wine glasses hanging by their bases by the kitchen sink and towards a mug that was sitting in the sink, a brown ring at the bottom. The cup read ‘hang in there’ with a rainbow-colored bat flipped upside down, a goofy grin on its face.

“Seriously?” Sora snorted, muffling a laugh behind his hand and grinning at the cup. “That’s really cute.” He reached for a clean one, a simple green and white striped coffee cup, turning his attention to the coffee pot still warm over in the corner. So he hadn’t left all that long ago. Sora turned it back on to warm the coffee up and looked around the kitchen for a note but came up blank. No text message, either, he saw with a frown as he powered off his phone’s screen. “Where did you go?” he asked. He didn’t mind being alone but this wasn’t his house and he felt weird just waffling around in the kitchen while the coffee reheated.

He made a cup with some sugar and milk. He wasn’t much one for coffee but it was something to hold him over until Riku came home and he could ask for food properly. He moved to the living room and looked around at the interior, setting his cup down on a coaster on the coffee table. He looked around at the living room walls and saw some plants around on small side tables. Some were a bit wilted, others were plastic. Sora smiled again. So, someone like Riku couldn’t even keep a simple houseplant alive?

He wandered over to the entertainment center and paused, staring at what looked like a family photo. There was a tall, tanner skinned male at the middle back, staring off to the side where the others were looking. In front of him stood three Rikus.

“He wasn’t joking,” Sora said with an amused tilt of his lips, glancing at the three males. Triplets. The boys on the left and right had their father’s hand on their shoulders, presumably, the middle son looking in the direction of the others--off to the side yet forward. All boys had the same haircut with only minor differences in length. Had Riku not had greenish eyes, he’d have probably mixed him up. Thankfully, it seemed, two of the brothers had a piercing blue, their father’s eyes such a pretty brown they were almost  _ gold.  _ Striking, all males dressed up properly into suits, high-necked and sophisticated. 

Though the triplets were all staring blankly ahead like their father, there was a mixture of expressions just beneath the surface. The left twin, Sora squinted, looked a bit uncomfortable. The right twin, however, looked annoyed. Only Riku looked relatively calm. Bored, maybe. Sora licked his lips and reached for the frame before pausing. It wasn’t his place to snoop any further, despite his curiosity wondering what was on the other side of the portrait. He had only just become friends with Riku and here he was, wondering where Riku’s mother could be, wondering if there was a note on the back of the frame, well-worn and dented, a thin layer of dust concealing the picture’s true colors.

The thought saddened him. His own father had been out of the picture for so long that he felt ill for even considering the thought that Riku’s mother might be in the same boat. Maybe she had remarried or something worse. He felt he had to sit down and stop his wandering eyes. The more he learned about Riku, the more he  _ wanted  _ to learn but that wasn’t his place to do so. They were friends at best and even then he’d have to learn to keep his curiosity buried down deep; Sora living here was only temporary after all. Riku had to stay his moderator and nothing more. He swallowed down a sip of his coffee and looked out the window off to the side. 

He was selfish for wanting someone like Riku to call his own.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Riku gripped the bags in his hand and fumbled in his pocket for his house key, leaning against the door as he tried to slot it into the keyhole, failing a few times with a curse and then getting the key in, twisting it and pushing the door open with his hip, coming face to face with a startled looking Sora sitting on his couch with a cup in his hands.

“Hi,” Riku said, shutting the door with the back of his heel, “Had to head up to the college for a bit.” He tossed the keys onto his desk, letting them skid and clink into his laptop, putting the bags down on the coffee table. The smell of soy sauce and shrimp was thick in the air. Riku reached back to lock the door and adjust his hoodie. “I stopped and picked up some Chinese, you hungry?”

“Starved,” Sora said with a smile. Riku kicked off his shoes in a heap by the door and shuffled his way passed to the kitchen, fiddling in the cupboards for paper plates and plastic cups, tucking them under his arm and tugging a bottle of soda from the fridge, then shutting that door with his heel as well. Sora gave him a smile as Riku came back and set everything down, taking a seat on the floor and reaching for the remote to turn it on before he started diving into the bags.

“We got...pork fried rice, crab rangoons, some fried chicken, teriyaki, uh…” he reached into the bag and pulled out the dampened receipt, looking it over with a squint. “And fortune cookies, as always. Oh, and orange chicken, too, so...help yourself.” he said. Riku slid some of the containers over, opting to grab a pork fried rice one himself and a bundle of chopsticks, making Sora snort.

“What?”

“Nothing, I just…” he laughed softly and took his spot next to Riku on the floor, opting for some rangoons. He opened his own package of chopsticks and gave them a little click together, “My brother used to always use a fork, he never could figure chopsticks out, just brought back a nice memory is all.”

“Oh yeah,” Riku said, mixing his rice around, “You said you had a brother on stream.”

“I do, he’s a year older.”

“Must be nice,” Riku said, glancing at the TV and then towards Sora, “Being the older brother sucks sometimes.”

Sora gave a hum of agreement. Vanitas...he had it rough. Always had to play the guardian, be the parent when his parents couldn’t. Taught Sora life skills, how to write better, how to color inside the lines, the perfect sand texture for a sand castle. How to ask someone out, how to change a car’s oil, how to heal a broken heart. He wondered when his brother would come back to town and then his stomach fell a bit. “He wanted me to move in with him, a few weeks ago.”

Riku swallowed his bite of food, reaching for a soy sauce packet, “You don’t sound too enthused about that idea.”

“I mean, I love my brother but...he travels a lot and I’m more of a sedentary kind of guy. I wouldn’t say I get homesick but I definitely like familiar scenery. If I had to sleep in a hotel every night or wake up on a moving bus, I don’t know if I could ever get comfortable with it.” Sora decided to start quieting both his stomach and his mouth. He only managed a bite before Riku gave a shrug beside him.

“Well,” Riku tucked his food into his cheek away from the side Sora was on, “Nothing is permanent. Maybe a change of scenery will do you good. And, if not, you at least got to experience a little bit of the world that you otherwise might not have. I’m not saying you  _ should  _ go with him but it’s not the worst case situation you could find yourself in.” He took a second to finish his bite and then started poking around for something else in a container. “Regardless, even if he travels around a lot, he still gave you the offer. He really cares about you, Sora.”

Sora glanced down at his plate and gave a halfhearted nod. “Yeah, he does. We used to be really close but once high school happened, he treated me so differently. He kept pushing me away, kept yelling at me in front of his friends, and even insulted my hobbies,” he said with a wry smile. “But I know now it was the ‘high school mentality’. He had cool friends and the things he used to love--that _we _used to love--were deemed childish and too goofy for him to really be associated with any more. But it stung. It drove a rift between us, you know? But then he graduated and discovered who he was and by then, well...it took a long time to start getting back to being on friendly terms. But deep down, he’s still got the ‘big brother’ gene.”  
“Yeah, I understand that,” Riku said, poking at his food idly while he spoke, nudging a rangoon around his plate, droplets of soy sauce spattering the plate like oil, divided into sections. “Admittedly, I was the same way in high school. My brothers and I are all the same age but we all had different likes and dislikes by the time high school came around. We became less of a family and more of a nuisance until we all got moved to different schools. Since then, only one of my brothers had even tried to get back to being friendly, and we’re on speaking terms. Don’t see each other often but he comes by on occasion.”

“What happened?” Sora asked and immediately regretted it, watching Riku drop his gaze further and shift a little in his seat. There was a soft sigh and a shrug, a tired laugh from Riku’s chest.

“We all just...had our differences, and for some of us, they were too different, we just kept butting heads.” Riku gave another shrug, reached for some orange chicken and dropped the piece twice before he grabbed it precariously in a bad pinch. “I was born first, and then my first brother, Ritsu was born after about an hour. And then, there were some complications, but my second brother, Rozu, was born and had to be taken away. My mother, apparently, thought he’d died. My father kept calling it an omen,” Riku said with a dark laugh, a shake of his head. “He ended up being the ‘black sheep’, and to this day me and Ritsu never see him much. He actually lived with me for a bit but the falling out turned out to be a literal  _ fallout _ and I don’t remember much, but I was hospitalized.”

“What?!” Sora said, dropping his chopsticks and sending some noodles flying, “What happened?!”

“I just said I don’t remember, Sora,” Riku said with a laugh. Almost as if on cue, his side gave a twinge where the scar was. He remembered, at least, trying to wrestle a knife from his brother’s hands, smelling alcohol on his breath, eyes wide and stained with tears. Faint shouting, the words difficult to parse but deafening in Riku’s ears nonetheless, hazy with an old memory. Remembered seeing white and then  _ red _ , pressing a hand to his side. His brother had intended on ending his own life but instead, on accident, almost took Riku’s.

Riku forgave him, as did Ritsu, but as the years went on, it seemed Rozu couldn’t forgive himself. They got a call on Christmas, as was tradition, still got his Christmas card in the mail, a generic little thing with printed text of “Merry Christmas’ on the inside but no message otherwise. Tradition, yes, but something done begrudgingly by a guilty sibling who couldn’t find the words to say "I’m sorry".

“As far as I know, he got sober, got some help, but he doesn’t speak to any of us these days, and if we do get to hear from him, it’s usually a favor or a few words here or there. As long as he’s alive and healthy, that’s all that matters.”

“Yeah, but…” Sora dropped his head, grabbing a napkin to wipe off the coffee table where his noodles spilled and splattered, “I just...he’s your brother, you should try and talk to him.”

  
  


Riku nodded. “We have. Trust me we have. Our father would have a better chance at talking to him and he fucking despises our old man. And anyways, we--” Riku and Sora jumped as the doorknob was rattled and turned. There was an all-familiar shift of metal as a key was inserted and both Riku and Sora looked at each other for a moment before the door was opened. And there stood Roxas, looking at the scene before him with an air of confusion. His eyes flicked to Riku’s and then Sora’s, stiffened body posture loosening and backpack shuffling on his spine as he came to terms with the familiar scene--the familiar  _ boy _ .

“Hey,” Roxas said.

“Hi,” Sora replied, and Riku said nothing, still gaping.

“What are you doing here? Why didn’t you knock?”

“Well,” Roxas said, kicking off his shoes and sitting across from them on the floor, “It’s _Friday_. Our _study day. _And you gave me a house key two years ago and told me, and I quote, ‘feel free to let yourself in if I’m not home’, so I did.”  
“But I _am _home,” Riku said, pointing chopsticks accusingly at the blond. “So knock.”

Roxas rolled his eyes, knocked on the table, and then reached for an extra plate. “Done. Happy? You act like  _ I  _ don’t listen and yet here  _ you  _ are,” Roxas said, popping a piece of broccoli into his mouth with a grin. Riku stiffened and sighed, bringing a hand up to rub at his forehead.

“I was going to explain the situation but I didn’t know how to approach it. I forgot it was Friday. Something happened yesterday and I wasn’t thinking straight, that’s all.”

“And I guess you didn’t tell him.” Roxas said, aiming his glance at Sora specifically, who shrunk back under the scrutiny. He looked at Roxas and then towards Riku questioningly. “That’s a no,” Roxas said, fishing around a container for a teriyaki beef skewer. 

“I didn’t get the chance,” Riku said and Roxas raised a hand cloyingly, giving it a loose little wave.

“It’s  _ you _ ,” Roxas said, “You’re not gonna tell him. Anyways.” Roxas turned his attention back to Sora, “SleepingKeyhole, right?” Sora flinched and gave a timid nod, a blush forming on his cheeks. He wondered briefly if Roxas was a fan, at least until he kept speaking. What would he do if there was a fan in front of him? If he got noticed? Technically, Riku already had and though it was an accident, it didn’t feel as embarrassing as this. “I’m AdminThirteen.”

Sora’s blushing cheeks instantly paled. He could practically see the silvery white name in the chat, hovering menacingly. Could see it there, prominent and imposing. Sora swallowed nervously but Roxas didn’t seem to notice, giving another wave of his hand. “But since you seem to be on a first name basis with WaytoDawn, I’m Roxas. And Riku, here…” Roxas jabbed a thumb in Riku’s general direction and gave a low, heavy sigh. “He’s fired.”

“What?!” Sora yelped, whipping his head towards Riku who was simply gaping his mouth like a suffocating fish and Roxas gave another sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose, food forgotten on his plate. 

“Is what I’d  _ like  _ to say. I’m sure you know that when you signed up for the website, we made you go through some prompts and one of them was stating how serious we treat anonymity and our streamer’s privacy. Having Riku here know your name, be  _ chummy _ with you--that can get him in serious trouble and he knows this. And I’m sure you, too. It’s bad enough ‘Riku’ was already a hot subject on your streamer forum. All it takes is one person to recognize you and see you with Riku to assume. Even worse is if anybody were to find out  _ who  _ WaytoDawn  _ is,  _ if a streamer was sleeping around with a moderator--”

“But we’re not--!”

“--it could not only look bad for the company because it goes against our privacy policy, but it could get serious to the point regular users would riot. I’m sure you know that. There have been several incidents in which people have rioted or called for complaints that we're still cleaning up, lawsuits and all.” Roxas looked up at Riku who was staring down at the table, curled up on himself. He hadn’t meant to give that impression to Roxas but he hadn’t even been given the time to explain. Roxas  _ was  _ correct but the fact of the matter is it was bad timing and nothing more.

“Riku and I--we’re not like that. Uhm...I-I mean, since you already know that I know his name...I can at least give you mine, it’s Sora. And we didn’t  _ mean  _ to even be in this situation. Riku bumped into me at a coffee shop and then we started talking over emails. We...okay, we admittedly hung out once…” Sora refused to mention it was a ‘date’--they were already in hot water. “B-But he went to drop me off at home yesterday and...my apartment was broken into. I was too afraid to sleep in my own apartment, and I didn’t have anywhere else to go on such short notice, so…”

“I invited him here until the cops find the thief. That’s it.” Riku said, “I’m not going to let him go back to a place that was easily broken into. His front door was kicked off the hinges for fucks sake. Roxas, you know I’ve been a great mod for a long time, I wouldn’t compromise my job. I just...I couldn’t leave him in a ransacked house. So, again, he’s only here until the cops find the robber. He streams in another person’s house so he can continue his job and I can stay at home and moderate. If it really matters, I can moderate another stream in the meantime to keep people off our trails.”

Roxas tapped his painted nails on the table a few times before shrugging, poking around a container for some noodles. “It’s not up to me,” Roxas said after a minute, tipping a container upside down and scraping the noodles onto his plate with a cocked head and a squint, “But I’m also not an asshole. As far as I’m aware, if we can still do our study session,” he looked over at Sora, “ _ And  _ if he’s cool, then I’m fine with it. But it has to stay temporary, alright? Not like you guys are blatantly trying to break the rules, I can understand circumstances so...I saw nothing.”

Riku heaved a sigh of relief and brought back a lazy smile, rubbing his hands together almost excitedly as he sat up a little straighter, “You  _ do  _ care about me, Roxy!”

“Shut the  _ fuck  _ up, asshole,” Roxas said, putting a piece of broccoli on his fingernail and then flicking it at Riku. The trajectory slipped, curling off towards Sora who instinctively tipped his head up to be closer to Riku’s level and caught it poorly with his mouth, the vegetable falling right into his hands that fumbled to catch it. It happened in an instant and the room went quiet before Roxas snorted, laughter building into something raucous. “You really  _ are  _ a camboy!” he said, howling.

The rest of lunch went through less nerve wracking than it started, to the point Sora and Roxas actually fought over a crab rangoon with chopsticks, ending up with the treat torn in half, a larger and smaller piece, both boys deciding to rock paper scissors for the larger piece before finding the plate empty, Riku chewing and wiping off his hands, immediately getting tackled to the ground over the table and sending empty containers flying. Sora laughed a few times, but ultimately, all three boys took a break to clean up and mop the floor, sitting down on the wood again with the smell of lemons and old garlic in the air. Sora took to using Riku’s laptop on the couch while Riku and Roxas had their usual study session.

For a while, it was quiet save for Riku explaining an answer or how to solve a problem, fixing Roxas’ atrocious spelling and being regaled with stories about Xion in the meanwhile. Sora mostly zoned out, but he did manage to catch some tidbits here and there. He learned enough that Xion was Roxas’ girlfriend and that they really liked video games, movies, and music. She also apparently painted his nails every week and he loved it.

The silence was broken after a few minutes of keyboard typing, pages being turned, and pen scribbling when Roxas lifted his head towards Sora but kept his eyes on his book, “So, if his house got broken into, it’s Friday, is he...gonna stream here or something?”

Riku looked up after a delayed second and Sora’s fingers hovered above the keyboard, looking at each other after a beat. 

“No,” Sora said, “I probably won’t stream tonight. I tend to do it at my friend’s house since he’s gone on the weekends but I’d feel weird doing it after yesterday.”

“Fair,” Roxas said, followed by ‘Fuck!” and frantic erasing, getting a snort from Riku, rolling his eyes and reaching for his pen.

“Well, we’ll probably have a calm night and look into it,” Riku said, stuffing some books into his bag and reaching for a green folder, “What are you doing tonight?”

Roxas didn’t answer right away, still trying to fix his answer with an absentminded ‘uhh’ that dragged on for a few seconds before he exhaled, a lopsided shrug and more scribbling. “Dunno. Xion’s out with her friends, most of mine are going to a party. Might just hang out with Axel for the night.”

“Though his name was Lea?”

“Yeah, Lea- _ Axel _ . Not my fault he has two first names, that’s a personal problem and one I cannot solve--much like this fucking history homework, I don’t caaaaaare about how many fucking molars cavemen used to have, they don’t need them  _ now,  _ now do they?!” he snapped, dropping his pencil to press fingertips in his eyes and falling back to the floor, cushioning his head with his backpack and flopping his arms by his sides. “Got any ice cream?”

“It’s winter.”

“All the more reason it’d stay cold.” Roxas enthused, getting up and heading to the kitchen to fumble in the freezer. Sora looked up as Roxas left and brushed a glance to Riku who returned it with a smile and a shrug, bringing a hand to his head and making his index finger spin in a small circle by his temple, a soft whistle. Sora snorted just as a muffled ‘I heard that, asshole!’ was shouted from the kitchen, freezer door slammed shut and wrapper being torn open, tossed to the trash. Roxas came back with a fudge pop, sitting back down on the floor.

“Do my homework,” he said to Riku who replied with a short ‘nope, best friends only’. “Wow,” Roxas said, turning his attention to Sora, “Tell your boyfriend to do my homework, I’m his best friend.”

Sora’s head tossed up so fast he got dizzy. Riku didn’t seem fazed, still looking through his folder of paperwork, thumbing through leaflets. “Um,” Sora said and Roxas rolled his eyes.

“Lighten up, bud, I’m just messing with you. I can finish this later, I don’t wanna look at it anymore,” he said, stuffing his homework into his bag and then flopping over onto the floor, bringing his legs up onto the armrest to the left of Sora, hands comfortably slotting over his stomach with a pleased sigh. In between his fingers rested the popsicle, lightly wiggling as Roxas’ hands moved before he turned his head back to the side to look at Riku. There was a long moment of silence before Roxas huffed a soft laugh and sat back up properly, reaching for his phone to text something before he stood up and started grabbing his belongings.

“Axel’s on the way so I’m gonna head out. But before I forget…” he started fumbling again for his phone, tapping and swiping this way and that before he stuck the rest of his ice cream in his mouth and spoke with the stick poking through his teeth. “Next time you leave a donation of that size, at least use a fucking invoice so it doesn’t show up on the stream. I scrubbed the message but if another admin goes snooping, there’s not much I can do.”

Riku’s face paled at the announcement. He had totally forgotten donations stuck around in the stream. “I was careless,” Riku replied, “At the time I just--”

“It’s fine,” Roxas said with a shrug, double checking his backpack and switching the popsicle stick to the other side of his mouth, swinging his bag over one shoulder, “Just don’t make it a habit.” he said, moving towards his shoes. He slipped them on quickly, tugging them over his heels and looked over at Riku for a long moment in silence. Sora saw something hidden in the expression but didn’t miss the way Riku shrunk under the stare. There was a reason it was going unsaid; Sora wasn’t meant to  _ know.  _

“I know,” Riku said quietly, looking down at his book though it was obvious he wasn’t reading the words. He almost looked as if he were scolded, hands curling into fists atop the papers. “I won’t.”

“Good.” Roxas opened the door and jabbed a thumb to the exit, “I’m going to meet him a block away, he’s stopping at the convenience store. You two behave.” Roxas gave them a little wave, made a show of locking the door and flourishing his key in a little wiggle of a loose hand, and then shut the door behind him, the sound of shoes moving down the steps and a figure moving past the curtains. Riku exhaled a breath he didn’t know he was holding and snapped his book shut, leaning back against the couch.

“That...well,  _ that _ was Roxas. My best friend, the ever-present thorn in my side, and technically my superior. He got me the job a long time ago. He’s younger than me, a little mouthy, but...he’s never betrayed me or let me down. Tells it to me like it is. I’m not sure how long you’ll live here but you’ll probably get used to him in time,” Riku said, sliding his own book to the desk behind him.

Sora looked at him for a moment and gave him a smile. “Not my place to judge your friends; if he makes you happy, then you found a good one.”

“True,” Riku took his place back on the couch beside Sora on the left and looked over at him briefly before focusing his attention back on the muted TV where what looked like a restaurant commercial was playing. “What about  _ your _ friends? I realize I don’t know anything about you, though, I mean, that's kind of the point.” he said with a soft laugh.

“Mmm, well, there’s Ven - I met him when I was delivering pizzas, him and his friend Terra, though I don’t think I've ever seen him outside of a picture. I only really talk to my friend Pence, he’s the person who lets me use his room. He’s really shy, mostly stays to himself, probably why we got along so well,” Sora said, rubbing nervously at the back of his neck. “He went to college for photography which is why he has so many fancy lights and stuff, and his computer is a monster because he loves to game, he used to stream on the side himself which is why he taught me how to do it.”

“He’s fine with…. _ you know _ ?”

“Yeah, mostly. In fact, he was the one who helped tie me up for that one stream. M-My arms, not the...yeah. Well. He knows times are tough for me, he never pries. I wash the blankets when I’m done and clean up everything and he never really uses that room because it’s just a spare bedroom. He just takes the lights and stuff sometimes for photoshoots. Other than that, it’s basically mine.”

“How come you never moved in with him?” Riku asked and instantly regretted it when he saw Sora’s face fall. 

“Well, it’s not really  _ his  _ house; it’s still his mother’s. She’s just always away on business, but on the off chance she comes home, I think she’d like a house without a random guy filming his butt.”

Riku snorted and covered a laugh behind his hand. Sora beamed in response, brushing some of his unruly strands behind his ears and joining in the laughter. It felt...nice. Both boys (despite the odds) joking and laughing like they’d been friends for weeks as opposed to just a few days. Riku wiped an eye and then smiled, looking at the hardwood floor. They might not be able to live together after a few days but that didn’t mean they had to stop being friends, and honestly? That sounded so much like heaven, to be able to have a friend he could just let loose some boundaries with. That wasn’t to say he was an individual that pried, but it also meant that he could just make jokes and not feel guilty for offending.

Besides, how many people could say they were friends with a camboy?

\--------------------------------------

The night came and went. Sora had posted that his stream would not be happening today due to ‘personal grievances’ and left people to speculate on the forums. Riku decided to take this time to cook them both a small dinner and continue with his Friday ritual. He poured a glass of wine and sat at the desk with his laptop on and a random stream circulated in Sora’s stead. Sora couldn’t hear the stream since Riku had an earbud in and was typing away but he kept glancing over curiously behind Riku’s back until he got up to watch.

The streamer--a male--was currently showing off a toy. His brown hair was spiked and slicked back, blue eyes a greenish color from the dim lights of his room and the light of whatever streaming software he was using. On stream, he was demonstrating what looked like a whip with several tendrils, reminiscent of a duster. However, Sora knew what it was: a flogger. The streamer was running fingers down a leather appendage and seemingly describing its use and why it was good.

“Whatcha doing?” Sora asked, watching Riku jump and take out the earbud to spin around and look at Sora, hand to his chest.

“Sorry, sorry, I...I keep forgetting that someone else is in my house.” Riku said, looking up at Sora expectantly who was looking over his shoulder. “Do you want to listen in? He’s one of the best streamers but he rarely makes an appearance these days, only his wife, but he’s really knowledgeable. From what I know, he even sells online classes and videos on his personal website.” 

Sora looked at the streamer, now running fingers down the braided handle, indicating towards the loop on the heel of the flogger. He was smiling, and seemed passionate about it. Sora gave a nod and Riku unplugged the earbud, cranking the volume on his laptop so the deep voice filtered into the room.

“--a braid like this keeps the grip firm so it won’t slip from your hand, and this is very important. You don’t want to hurt yourself or your partner,” the streamer--CumGuardian--had said, turning sideways to reveal a beautiful woman with brightly dyed blue hair lying on the bed, face down and ass up. She had nothing on but a pair of white underwear, wrists and ankles hogtied. She didn’t seem distressed; in fact she seemed comfortable. “Now, for a proper technique, it’s all in the wrist, not the arm. You want to strike firmly but make sure you don’t hit bone. We’re here to cause pleasure, not trauma and mistakes. Now, take your arm and in one smooth motion…”

The streamer brought his hand down, the flogging whip cracking loud against the woman’s ass who gave a short shout and then fell quiet, a soft moan in the room. “Just like that. You don’t need to hit hard, just firmly. Now, again--”

Sora watched, transfixed. His eyes roved over the chat, which is where Riku’s attention seemed to be, a soft scent of wine coming from Riku’s breaths. “Do you even watch the streams?” Sora asked and Riku gave a little shrug.

“Sometimes. Some regular streamers are predictable, you know what they do after a while so you tend to lose interest. Some folks like that sort of constant predictability, that routine; others get bored and move on to greener pastures.”

Sora’s face fell. He’d gained lots of watchers but it only took a third stream to get haters, to get hacklers bored of what he was doing. Was that his fate, to get only a handful of people who liked his videos and then start losing followers like crazy? “Do most streamers have a partner?”

“Hm?” Riku looked up at Sora and then back to the screen where CumGuardian was now showing a riding crop, neon pink and beautifully shiny. “Not always; there are some solo players but they tend to bring on a partner or do a ‘collab’ sometimes with another streamer. Some do things like that for charity. Two of the largest streamers once decided to do a ‘challenge’ on stream in the same house, the same room. Some people called them long lost twins, they were both incredibly gorgeous, white hair and tan skin. Deep voices. Thick chests, the whole nine yards, anybody would be honored to be their playmate for the evening. They’d subject themselves to the same fetishes and toys and such, see which one would crack first, who was superior. Their rivalry was huge for a long time until they eventually started dating. They changed their username joint page to ‘Enemies2lovers’ as a joke when they retired.”

Sora hummed in thought, watching as the brunette on screen struck again at his wife, watching her lips open into a pleased ‘O’ shape, tears forming at the corners of her eyes. She didn’t seem pained; in fact, she seemed rather pleased, the asscheek closest to the screen a pleasant cherry red and a white spot fading from where the crop had hit her. They seemed...happy. They loved their job.

Could Sora love being a Camboy? He certainly enjoyed it; it was embarrassing, sure, but he loved playing, loved showing off his toy collection. Hell, he loved the blanket that was given to him as a gift and still smelled the scented lubes when he needed a calming moment. But could he see it as a career that he could do months down the road, or even years? Some of these streamers had been doing it for ages it seemed like. He hadn’t planned on doing this long-term but at the same time, would it be better if he found someone else to do videos with?

His cheeks flushed at the thought. He’d stupidly called out Riku’s name in a stream once, but he’d let his thoughts and fantasies consume his self control and dashed it out the window. But what if it  _ was  _ the real deal? Maybe not even Riku but  _ someone?  _ How much more entertaining would it be--not even just for himself--if he was riding something living and breathing rather than a bright, silicone toy that anybody could nab for twenty munny? Something firmer, something without a cum tube, something he could lie back and take and completely lose himself to while others watched. Something that would actually give his condoms  _ purpose _ .

What would it be like to be able to  _ really  _ have fun on stream? To clean  _ actual  _ cum from his body and not some glitty, goopy, artificial mess? What would it be like to grip strands of hair, cry out a name that could reciprocate with his own, with another firm thrust as a new dance picked up rhythm? What would it be like to feel firm, pale abs grinding down on his back, warm breath fanning down his neck across his baby hairs at the nape, the scent of wine stinging his nose--

“You okay?” Riku asked. Sora didn’t notice he’d turned to face him completely, Riku looking at him spun around in his chair enough to keep eye contact.

“Yeah, I was just...thinking.”

“About what?”

“Do you think my streams are going to get stale if I just keep doing toy demonstrations? I mean, this guy,” he said, gesturing to the stream with a pointed finger, “He’s doing exactly that but he has someone to try them on. People aren’t always going to want to watch me stream and show off toys, right?”

Riku took a glance at the screen and grazed the chat before he looked back at Sora, rubbing at the back of his neck. “I don’t know. People’s interests are fickle. What works for one streamer won’t work for another, you know? Having a consistent schedule and play choice isn’t a bad thing, Sora. If it works for you then it works, and if it doesn't, then you have all the information you need to switch it up a little.”

Sora didn’t seem all that excited by the news and Riku spun his chair back to the front of the desk, opening a new tab and re-opening the porn site, clicking around on some pages before he got to Sora’s, and from there, he clicked around at the analytics and let Sora take in the information. On screen was a multi-colored graph, the days he streamed. He followed the squiggles up and down, seeing the number of new followers, new watchers, people who clicked off, how long they watched and so on. Some streams, the numbers were massive and other streams, like the one where he turned it off early, did poorly. 

Sora’s eyes followed a reddish-pink line and he scowled as he made it to the end. The line dipped hard. People who clicked off the stream were growing. Admittedly, he’d had some bad streams and he could believe the fact that people  _ had  _ been turned off--literally--by this. But he wondered if that was even the real reason. What if he had a good stream and people still clicked off to the point he made no donations, no livelihood? What if people got tired of him? He felt his fists clench at his sides and chewed on his cheeks.  _ Just like everybody else.  _

“You know,” Riku started, eyes scanning the graphs and looking back towards Sora, “If you’re that worried, there’s a toy shop in town we could go to. They have a lot of rare things you could purchase and then the website covers it as a business expense and matches half the price. Getting something unique could help,” he said, looking back at the computer and tabbing back to the stream, checking the chat and then switching back over to the statistics. “If that doesn’t work, we could think of something.”

“You’re the expert here,” Sora said, sitting on the edge of the couch to look over at the computer screen, “I'll try out anything you recommend. I don’t know how much munny I’ll need to save but the more the merrier.” Sora looked at the reddish-pink line with vindication, rubbing his hands together. “I’ve...never gone to a toy store before, I’m not sure if I could walk in there and just buy something. Ask questions. Isn’t it embarrassing?”

“I mean, yeah,” Riku said, “But everybody is there for the same reason. If someone sees you buying toilet paper or condoms, they don’t really ask questions; the same thing applies at a toy shop. Besides, you don’t have to go alone, I’ll go with you. You got your I.D. right?”

“Right.”

“Then that settles it,” Riku said, sipping at his wine. “We’ll go to the store tomorrow night when it opens and at least look around.”

Sora gave a nod, watching as Riku tabbed back to the stream and adjusted the volume a little lower. Riku’s eyes blankly scrolled down the chat and Sora could only watch as the streamer gently thrust into his wife’s mouth, a circular ballgag keeping her mouth open. Large, strong hands gently held her throat, demonstrating the proper choking technique while the woman, now untied, moaned softly against the ministrations. Sora shuffled a bit on the couch and then moved to sit properly on the seat, hands firmly pressing down against his excited lap.

\------------------------------------------

“Is this okay?” Sora asked, watching as Riku made the bed.

“Yeah, why wouldn’t it be?” he said, shaking out the blankets and smoothing them back over the top of the mattress, “You slept in my bed last night, it’ll just be the same, right?” He looked up at Sora who simply shimmied a bit in place, an oversized, stained white shirt covering the edges of his boxer briefs enough that only a strip of black was visible beneath the hem of his shirt, which Sora was grabbing at with white knuckles.

Riku put a hand to his hip and huffed a soft breath, “If you’re uncomfortable, I can go take the couch, I really don’t mind-”

“No, it’s okay, this is your bed, I can--I mean, I just feel really bad about this whole thing. I’m an adult, I shouldn’t be afraid to sleep in a living room by myself.” He lowered his head and looked at the floor, still picking at the hem of his shirt. Riku sat down on the bed and then gave it a pat after a moment, watching Sora hesitate before shuffling over to sit down with a soft creak. 

“You had a bad experience, Sora, I don’t think any less of you because you’re afraid to sleep alone in the living room. It’s only been a day, you won’t just magically recover,” he said, looking over at Sora who was trying to keep eye contact, but kept looking down guiltily. “Besides, you’re not a coward or whatever you think you are over the situation. If you feel safer sleeping in this room, in the bed, then you feel safest doing so. And if it really matters, you can even lock the bedroom door or double check the window locks.”

Sora gave him a small smile but couldn’t pick up his head. Riku sighed and then reached over to put a hand on Sora’s shoulder, watching that messy head perk up slightly. “Whatever you have to do to feel safe while you’re here, I’ll do. Alright?” he gave Sora a proper smile and watched as Sora returned it with a sheepish, shaky one of his own, a quick glint of teeth and then a poorly masked sniffle.

Riku could only stiffen in surprise as he felt the boy next to him suddenly wrap both arms around his side, bury his face into Riku’s shoulder and just hold him. Though an awkward angle, Riku smiled and moved his arm over to return the gesture, a palm flat to Sora’s spine. Warm, soft skin beneath his fingertips only shielded by a thin t-shirt. “C’mere,” he said quietly, feeling Sora shift properly before all but collapsing into Riku’s chest with a stifled sob. Riku’s hand hovered for a long moment, unsure of what to do. He hadn’t meant to make him cry, but it seemed everything came crashing down again.

He brought both arms over the boy carefully and bowed his head, resting his chin along Sora’s shoulder. “It’s alright,” he said quietly, “Let it out.” Sora seemed to try and contain his sobs and sniffles, but in the end, he fell victim to its impulses. He was inconsolable for a few minutes but eventually calmed down, a faint headache and a feverish face left over from the sobbing and mortification. 

But Riku said nothing through it all, only getting up to grab some tissues and a small waste bin from the bathroom. He let Sora take care of himself and blow his nose before falling silent once more. With a small smile, Riku sat back down on the bed, letting Sora’s erratic breathing settle down from choked inhales to faint hiccups, and then just deep gulps. “What happened?” Riku asked after a while and Sora took a few steady inhales before he gave a lopsided shrug, wiping at dry, irritated eyes.

“I...I don’t know,” he admitted under his breath. “I was fine one minute, and then the next I started crying,” he said, looking down at the floor. “I guess it all just sunk in again, that’s all.”

“Understandable. You were robbed; you lost something you worked hard for,” he said, brushing back some of Sora’s bangs to see those eyes, now darkened with sorrow. Riku frowned and then placed a hand again on Sora’s back, rubbing small circles against his spine. “Do you feel better?”

“No,” Sora said, “I feel stupid.”

“For crying?”

“Yeah,” he said after a breath of silence. “I had a great day and right at the  _ end _ , everything hits me?” he croaked, feeling the weight of his tongue working hard to swallow past the lump in his throat. “Kinda makes me feel a little foolish.”

Riku hummed and sat so he was leaning his weight on his palms, glancing at the fake potted plant by his window. “Don’t ever let anybody tell you crying is pathetic or stupid or ‘foolish’. You’re allowed to feel things, even if you don’t understand them. If you had to cry, then you  _ had  _ to cry--sometimes life’s just that simple.”

“Easy for you to say,” Sora grumped, “You’re not the one who’s ugly cried  _ twice _ in front of a guy who hasn’t.”

Riku’s gaze fell and he went quiet again. For a while he said nothing, and then he frowned and got up, moving towards the other side of the bed before slotting himself in comfortably beneath the sheets. “Let’s just go to bed.” he practically whispered, shuffling a bit once more before falling still.

Sora blinked, watching as the male rolled to his side beneath the covers, back facing him. “Riku…?” he started but the male said nothing, clicking off the bedside lamp and leaving Sora in the dark. For a moment, Sora simply sat there, wondering what he’d said, but it wasn’t his place to know. Instead, he resolved to move to his side of the bed, slipping beneath the covers and rolling so he was facing away from Riku, legs bent and hanging off the mattress.

He didn’t know when he felt the urge to cry again, but he bit it down harshly.

  
  
  


\----------------------------

The morning was uneventful. Riku woke up before Sora and took a shower while the coffee percolated, stepping into the kitchen to prepare breakfast. He managed a simple quiche and started on his cup of coffee when he heard the bathroom door close and moments later the toilet flush and sink turn on and off. Sora stepped from the bathroom and sat at the island stool, placing his hands over the marble counter awkwardly.

“Coffee?” Riku asked and Sora nodded, watching as Riku turned around to grab a clean mug from the dishwasher, pouring in a decent amount and handing it over, sliding down the sugar and creamer. “Ran out of milk,” he said, turning his attention back to the oven as it beeped.

Sora idled his time and made his coffee as best as he could, focusing on the fresh scent of the morning, the smell of breakfast and coffee, the clink of his stirring spoon. Riku set the deep dish pan on top of the oven and tossed down his oven mitt, taking a sip of coffee as he looked at Sora. “You’re gonna ask.”

The statement made Sora's head jolt, brown spikes jumping upwards with the movement, “What?”

“About last night, you’re gonna ask. And...I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be,” Sora placated, shaking his head and focusing on his muddied reflection in the steaming mug, “I was only speaking my mind and making a joke, I hadn’t meant to upset you.”

Riku turned his back and started working on their breakfasts, sliding Sora a plate that he dished and then sitting perpendicular to him on the other side of the island. “You didn’t do anything wrong, I thought of something I shouldn’t have and got upset by it. It was on me.”

“Still,” Sora said, looking at the quiche. He poked it gently with his fork and watched steam billow. “ _ I’m  _ the sorry one, Riku, I didn’t mean to bring back any sore subjects.”

Riku cut his fork into his breakfast and gave a small smile, “My last relationship, uhm...it ended horrendously and...the night I tried to make things right was the last time I’ve cried. Twice, in fact, for the guy I liked,” he said, laughing it off. Sora’s heart plummeted: so that was why Riku stilled at the precise words. “We tried to rectify it--well, I did, anyways--and in the end, he didn’t shed a single tear. Was never his way, he got mad before he got sad. He was always a man of actions, not words, so…” Riku gave a little shrug, idly flicked the piece he carved out around his plate in thought. “It doesn’t matter now, does it? He ended up leaving and I went full-on pathetic. Ugly crying, leaving voicemails, the whole nine yards, I was desperate to fix things but you don't always get what you want,” he said. He stuck the piece in his mouth and let Sora simply watch him for a moment in stunned silence.

“Riku, I didn’t...I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright,” Riku said, seemingly perking from venting his frustrations, or at least he was damn good at pretending. “We have breakfast to eat, I have some errands to run, and then the store opens at five, so we can head there and be the first to arrive so you don’t feel as awkward.”

“Is it…” Sora chewed on his bottom lip and gave a little shrug, “Is it alright if we do that, though?”

Riku finally seemed to get his appetite and tucked a bite of his quiche into his cheek, “Why wouldn’t it be? Technically, it’s part of my job to know these things and  _ technically  _ so is yours. We’re not doing anything wrong. But if you’re uncomfortable, we can ditch the idea or do some online shopping, they send packages in discreet wrappings and boxes so nobody--”

“I want to.”

“Alright,” Riku said, pointing his fork at Sora, “Then get some food in you.”

Breakfast came and went and Sora spent the next two hours getting taxied to and from different stores. Riku paid some bills, dropped off some paperwork for school, stopped by Xion’s house to give her back a book she had lent him, (a book on making rope bracelets, Sora noticed), and then a final trip to get a small snack at an ice cream shop. The ice cream was delicious but it did little to soothe the twisting knots in his stomach. The clock began to tick closer to the hour and soon, Sora found himself and Riku outside of the toy shop.

“Wait,” Riku said, reaching over to fumble in his glove compartment before pulling out a simple mask; a black cloth with a number three drawn on to make a kitty mouth, handing it to Sora. “wear this.”

“Why?”

“You don’t want to be recognized, do you? Rather safe than sorry,” Riku said, stepping out and slipping behind the car to crack the trunk, fishing around before he pulled out a black hoodie with red sleeves, handing it, too, to Sora. Sora was already wearing an olive green winter jacket, so he stared at the hoodie for a long while with a cocked head. “You can use the hood of it, your coat doesn’t have one.”

Sora took the hoodie and shook it out a bit, smoothing his hands over some wrinkles before he looked up with a blink. “Won’t they find this suspicious?” he asked, and Riku shook his head.

“You’ll get a pat down at the door but if they don’t find anything suspicious they don’t care if you’re a bit...discreet.” he said. “A lot of people come to this shop from what I know, including the mayor. Anonymity is important.”

Sora stared for a moment and then squinted, “Is this shop owned by Radiant Gard-”

Riku placed his palm quickly over Sora’s mouth and stared down into those wide blue eyes, giving a small warning shake of his head. “ _ No, _ ” he said, “It isn’t,” and then quickly wiped his mouth, making a faint zipper motion with his fingers. Sora hesitated only briefly before he smiled, a smug, crooked little thing. 

“So this is why you know about it,” he said, crossing his arms, “Does this mean you’re a patron of theirs?”

Riku didn’t answer, instead gesturing towards the mask and hoodie again. Sora grumbled, but undid his jacket. He was instantly blasted with the cold, but when he slipped on the gigantic hoodie, he felt the warmth from its cottony inside. It smelled a little musty, but he couldn’t help but get the faint whiff of something nice. It was Riku’s, he could tell. He quickly handed his coat back over and then took the face mask, sliding it over his face, followed by the hood. He was mostly covered, and at least people wouldn’t recognize him unless they  _ absolutely _ looked and studied him. Satisfied with the minor transformation, Riku closed his car back up and took the first steps into the shop, where he was greeted with a hallway covered in blackout papers, lit by a bright overhead lamp.

A tall man with dark hair and sharp sideburns greeted them with folded arms. He held out his hand expectantly. Riku slid over his I.D and Sora followed suit, watching as the man checked them over and then beamed them with a handheld blacklight. Riku took a step towards the door and the bouncer began to pat him down as expected, Riku removing his keys and wallet and what looked like an immensely tangled MP3 player into a small bin. Sora would’ve laughed; it felt like a trip to the airport, but he understood.

Riku began to put his things back into his pocket and Sora stepped forward, undoing his jacket and letting the man pat him down. Unlike Riku, all Sora had was a small wallet and some change. The man was much quicker with him and slid Sora down the queue, letting them both step into the store with what sounded like a deep ‘have fun’ before he shut the glass door behind them.

Sora’s jaw dropped.

The store was gorgeous. It had maroon walls and a black ceiling, a dark wooden textured ‘wood’ floor made of linoleum. Directly in front of them to the left was a large segment missing in the wall where the register sat and a woman with blond hair had their back turned, currently on the phone and leafing through some documents. The counter was glass and inside were what looked to be condoms, lubricants, and some smaller things Sora couldn’t quite make out from this distance. To the right was the rest of the store. 

Next to the register were mannequins of female torsos, all in a cream color. One of them had a harness, the other two in lingerie. There was a fourth mannequin in a shiny gunmetal black, standing on a table. It was a male’s full body, currently chained up in handcuffs and ankle bindings, what looked like nipple rings being chained together. Sora’s mouth ran dry and he chanced a glance at Riku who was already shuffling over to the wall to the right of the mannequins. Sora followed suit and shimmied away from the spacious opening to linger closer to the wall where Riku stood closer to the magazines on display on a wall rack.

“What do you think?” Riku asked, aiming his head to the side to suggest they go further.

“It’s…” Sora couldn’t describe it. He was expecting a tiny little dive on the side of the road, not a sex store the size of a small plaza building. Had there not been a sign on the front of it, Sora would have assumed it abandoned, the blank papers taped to the windows shielding it from the public eye. In fact, Sora probably  _ had  _ seen it, simply disregarded it and continued about his day. He stepped close to Riku as the male turned a corner and stepped into a wider room. There were more mannequins, many of the same with different garments or accessories. As they walked, Sora’s fingers trailed out against silken panties, cool and gliding like water beneath his fingers. He gave them a final look of want and then followed the footsteps leading farther away.

This room felt more like a sex store. There were sex toys on shelves with their price tags beneath it, an array of dildos, vibrators, anal beads and silicone replicas of body parts. On the opposite of that wall was the bondage gear, a darker selection of whips, crops, harnesses, shackles, and muzzles. And then, snuggled to the wall between, was the stranger things. Sora saw tails of all shapes and sizes hanging up in a furry rainbow, a matching set of ears above them wrapped in packages of plastic. This room was enormous, and that was missing all the things on smaller tables and black boxes and packages with a box on display of whatever the object was.

“You can look around,” Riku said, “Nobody will get mad if you touch things or examine.”

He, himself, was poking around at a wall, looking at familiar labels. His neck craned high and he glanced upwards at what looked to be a crudely drawn fireball, big blocky letters saying ‘hot’. Sora followed his gaze and came closer, looking upwards at the objects on display. It was a typical array of toys and gear, but Sora’s gaze fell on something else and he pulled it from the shelf, glancing down at baby blue handcuffs with soft fuzz. His fingertips ran over the texture and he couldn’t help the nervous laugh that escaped him.

“Catch your eye?” Riku asked, reaching over to touch the handcuffs. They were standard metal but they were covered in what felt like a soft gel, a layer of fur glued over the thicker part of the flat section of metal. “Yeah, these are a new sort of prototype. They’re tight but the gel ensures you don’t have any marks left or that the cuffs can’t cut into you if you struggle.”

Sora looked up at Riku with a gaping mouth and Riku simply shrugged, “They’re growing more popular for extended play sessions, especially for people with more active jobs. It reduces the risk of bruising or lacerations, so they’re starting to bump in purch--”

“Where’ve  _ you  _ been, you son of a bitch?” came a female voice and Riku turned to see the blond from earlier behind the counter, now staring at them with a hand on her hip, bangs slicked back but falling forward, unkempt.

“Been a while, Elrena,” Riku agreed, watching as her blue eyes squinted and checked Sora up and down before she tapped her chin. “This is a fellow...associate.”

“People tend to call me the IceQueen,” she said, snapping a piece of gum loudly and then jerking her chin in their directions, “Whatcha looking for?”

“This here’s a new streamer, he’s looking for something new to demonstrate,” Riku said, gesturing to the handcuffs, “What do you recommend?”

“Depends,” Elrena said, waving her hand for them to follow and stepping past them to a new room down a thinner hallway. This room was the usual maroon wall, black ceiling, fake wood floor, but  _ this  _ room was different. Instead of sex toys there was a massive, heart-shaped bed off to the side covered in two mannequins that were--no, not mannequins,  _ sex toys- _ -currently on an animation loop. It was jerky and uneven, but it was a male doll on top of another, grinding a silicone dick into the male’s ass, both turned on their sides in a sort of awkward topple. Sora felt his cheeks burn, but gratefully, the mask covered it.

There were two stripper poles stuck into the ceiling from a circular black platform to cover the floor. These walls were covered in much of the same items as before, though Sora noticed that  _ these _ were made more for bed. Lingerie, panties, bras, stockings--all shiny and silky, soft to the eyes. If they were anything like the panties he'd touched, then he was interested. Elrena seemed to notice and gave a soft, derisive laugh. “Oh, you’re one of  _ those  _ players, huh?” she said, stepping over to the bedside goods. She handed Sora a pair of red stockings, letting him touch them. A tentative hand came forward and he rubbed them, feeling the cold fabric beneath his fingers. Silkier than the panties.

“Want a matching set?” she asked.

“Huh?”

She was already searching for some panties that she assumed would fit him, a pair of fingerless gloves, and what looked like a bathrobe (though it was absolutely see-through), save for the edges of the arms and the neck, which were covered in a thick amount of faux fur and cotton. “If you like those, then you’ll  _ love  _ what else we got in stock,” she said, jabbing her thumb towards a wall closest to the bed. She reached over and grabbed what looked like another facemask in black and then something else.

“Really?” Riku said and she gave him an incredulous look and sigh.

“What?” she asked, handing the fabric over to Sora. He looked down into his palm and felt his heartbeat race. A blindfold, the softest one he’d ever felt. He felt his throat run dry and looked over at Riku, the taller male giving him a soft look.

“Are you alright?” he asked, not missing the red cheeks and awkward arms holding the clothing. Sora gave a nod and then gripped the items closer to his chest. He fidgeted a little awkwardly and then beamed beneath his mask, running his thumb inside the bundle of fabrics that was given to him.

“...I think I really like these,” he said, bringing his attention back to the wall and then Elrena, “What else you got?”

She cocked an eyebrow and then laughed, a vicious little thing, but simply flashed some teeth and then pointed towards the hallway they came from. “Can always get something pierced.”

At that, Riku bit down on his bottom lip and tried not to laugh, watching as Sora’s head spun and his face paled. “I got some of mine done here,” Riku said, stifling a laugh, “But if you wanted-”

“M-Maybe some other time.” Satisfied, Elrena gave a shrug and then continued walking back from where they came from, to the room with the toys. She tutted and ran her fingers down some boxes, handing Sora something with only a barcode as its only indication to what it was. Sora looked at the numbers and then the words. He made out ‘strawberry’ and ‘oralgel’, and giving Elrena a look, she pointed to her throat and then drew her hand across it.  _ A throat coat,  _ one that numbed the throat for use with toys and other things. He had heard about them but never needed such a thing, but if streamers used it, then maybe it was more of a popularity advertisement thing.

“Yo, Dawn, I’m stealing your streamer,” Elrena said, wrapping an arm around Sora’s shoulder and starting to lead him back to the entrance. Sora yelped and turned to look at Riku helplessly, who simply gave a sheepish smile and a ‘shoo’ motion, watching as Sora disappeared behind the wall.

Once they were out of earshot, Elrena went behind the counter and started rifling through some papers, looking over at something and then reaching her hand in a glass jar, returning with a handful of condoms. Sora opened his mouth to speak but she simply shrugged and said ‘On the house.” She looked around for something else and Sora brought his attention to the condoms. Numbing, stretchy, ‘porn star approved’ and guaranteed not to rip. That was well and good but none of Sora’s toys were that big, nothing he had to worry about a condom ripping over. He supposed the numbing aspect would help him last longer but maybe they were just a gesture of goodwill. Regardless, he put the items on the counter and expected him to go into checkout but she simply rested her chin on her hand and tapped her nails along the glass.

“You can take off the disguise, I obviously know the mod,” she said. Realization struck Sora slowly and then zipped down his spine. She did call him ‘Dawn’. “But I thought mods aren’t allowed to befriend streamers?” he said and she raised her eyebrow.

“Since when?”

“Since…” Sora paused. Something wasn’t adding up here, unless she was being rebellious? He had assumed it was a joke, maybe she was being filmed, but if that were the case then wouldn’t she expect anonymity? In place of an answer, she rolled her eyes generously and then raised her hand palm up and bent the fingers quickly, ushering him to hurry up. Sora frowned and then flipped off his hood, sliding the mask down beneath his chin. Instantly, Elrena hummed and then snapped her fingers.

“I thought you sounded familiar. What’s your name?”

“...SleepingKeyhole.”

She smacked her gum and smiled, another round of nails tap-tapping on the glass. “You’ve become something of an oddity you know.” she said, looking his face over with a none-too-subtle sweep of her eyes, “A lot of us veterans chat after shows, a few of them watch on burner accounts.”

Sora’s jaw opened and closed a few times and he felt himself shrink in on himself. People...watched him?  _ Streamers  _ watched him, talked about him without his knowledge? “Is it...good things they say?” he asked, unable to stop the words from pouring out. She gave her hand a wobble to suggest it was so-so and then went back to looking for something, eyes roving down what he could only assume was inventory.

“That depends on how thick your skin is,” she said, “Even us old bastards get hate from all sides, you get used to it. The amount of times we’ve laughed at Rubbinlamp and Malefluous, I tell ya. But listen: you’re here, you need help. What kinda advice can I do you for?”

“Well, R--Dawn brought me here to help me get some new things for my show but other than that I...I don’t know. I’ve never been to a store like this,” Sora said, feeling those eyes staying on him to the point he was uncomfortable. She had a gaze stronger and more intimidating than any ring light could be. Not even knowing people were looking at him while he was naked was as scrutinizing as those blue eyes. He now realized why she called herself the IceQueen. Scary.

“Well...lemme see what I have then,” she said, stepping behind her chair to move back a black curtain into a room lit by a blacklight, only shining briefly before the curtain covered it. “Lex, come here!’ she called, voice muffled. Sora stood there for a moment before he leaned against the counter. Riku still wasn’t here. But even despite that, he chewed on his cheek and idly ran his fingers across the silken garments laid atop the counter and tried to calm the slam of his heart.

Mods and streamers  _ could  _ be friends but Roxas seemed adamant they couldn’t, going so far as to saying Riku could be fired. They mentioned anonymity and yet Elrena dropped her name like it was nothing. Was there just some unspoken rules the  _ mods  _ knew but not the streamers? He’d have to look into the terms of service later tonight but for now he simply sat there awkwardly for a moment until Elrena came back with a small box, handing it over to him. “Here,” she said, “On the house. Everything else is half off, I just need your streamer number, you can find that when you log in and go to your account,” she said. Sora fumbled for his phone and swiped and tapped, giving her his eight-digit number and watching as she rang him up.

“So what is it?” he asked and she smiled, pressing a finger to her lips.

“My secret. But you’ll love it.” There was nothing but the gentle beep of the scanner over the clothes and the box and then she paused, looking behind her and grabbing something else with another beep, reaching underneath the counter shelves and then swiping a white card. She fiddled under the counter again and reached for a black plastic bag, folding what she could and stuffing the rest inside. Sora reached for his wallet and she shook her head, giving him a dismissive wave of her hand. “Don’t worry about it, I got it covered.” she said.

“N-No, I’m at a store, at least let me pay for-”

“For what? I  _ own _ this bitch; take it. I can make up the costs in five minutes on the next stream,” she said, sliding the bag over.

“I...thank you,” he said, grabbing the bag and tucking it close to his body. She smacked her gum and waved her hand again, stepping from around the counter before gesturing for Sora to follow once more. They moved through the rooms and stopped outside of an unmarked door, Elrena knocking once and shoving the door open. “Hey, Lucky, hurry it up,” she said.

Inside the room was a countertop with a sink, many glass cupboards and surgical supplies. There sat Riku on top of a table, shirt off, and a man with short blond hair and many piercings. The man was currently wiping at Riku’s chest with a rag covered in something wet, a brown bottle of alcohol off to the side with a pair of small tongs in his other hand. “Of course you’d disrupt me,” the man sighed, rubbing his chin scruff with the back of his forearm.

“All settled?” Riku asked, looking down at the piercings. Rather than the green barbells, they were replaced with a bright teal, freshly inserted. Sora glanced at them and then up at Riku who could only give a small smile. “I had an accident a few years back and one of them got ripped out. It healed over but sometimes, I have to get replacements and get the piercing flushed to make sure it doesn’t get infected. Figured I may as well get it done real quick before we left,” he said, standing up and reaching for his shirt, slipping it back on over his head.

“You sure you don’t want a piercing?” Elrena asked, crossing her arms and cocking her hip as she leaned against the doorway. Sora shook his head and then smiled, pointing at Riku, “I think he’s got enough of them for the both of us,” he said. Elrena cackled and left the room with a shake of her head while ‘Lucky’ sighed, clicking his tongue and putting his tools in a small container before moving to the sink to wash them.

“Do you need anything else today?” he asked and Riku shook his head.

“Just the usual, thank you. I’ll be back in a few weeks.” he said. The man nodded and Riku looked down at the bag, a little more stuffed than they left it. “Do you want to keep looking around or are you good for now?” he asked.

Sora shuffled the bag playfully in his hands and gave it a tiny swing, feeling the heft of it. “Nah, I should be good.” Riku nodded and grabbed his coat, sliding it on and then double checking for his keys and wallet before heading towards the exit. 

“Stop by a stream sometime, asshole!” Elrena shouted as they made their way to the exit. Riku just laughed and then gestured to the brunette beside him, watching as Elrena rolled her eyes and gagged loudly. He supposed he could open a second tab for her  _ sometime.  _ Still, they both gave her a wave and thanks and exited the store.

\--------------------------------------------

The drive home was quiet but the awkwardness that Sora felt at the store melted away. The sex store had been a little embarrassing, sure, but now that he'd left it, he was glad he'd dove into something that made him uncomfortable. Some in part he just loved being there and looking at things, but mostly in part that he'd enjoyed his time talking to Elrena. The fact that they were both streamers and working together as opposed to in opposition. Riku could only help him so much as a moderator, but he was still on the outside looking in. However, it seemed that he understood Sora enough, enough to  _ help _ , in wanting to go  _ to  _ help Sora out; even if in a way he otherwise couldn’t.

Sora put his purchases in the bedroom and then they sat down for dinner.

By bedtime, Sora was  _ restless _ . Between Riku’s new piercings glinting in the low light of the bedroom and the bag on Sora’s side of the bed, he was shifting uncomfortably. Riku had been in the middle of brushing his hair when he paused and caught Sora’s fidgeting in his vanity mirror, giving a soft laugh. “Everything alright? You look like you just downed a pot of coffee.”

“Sorry,” Sora said, and then reached for the bag, “Elrena gave me a bunch of things but she didn’t tell me what they were for. I guess it’s just made me antsy; normally when there’s toys in the bedroom it means I’m about to stream." 

“Oh.” Riku put down his brush and looked at Sora for a moment, “If you want, I could drop you off at your friend’s house? If you feel like you  _ should  _ stream?”

Sora shook his head, “No, that’s alright, I already posted I wasn’t going to stream yesterday, but I guess I just still have the Friday jitters,” he said, reaching inside the bag. He pulled out the spray, the lingerie, and then the black box that started to rattle. Tipping his head, he started undoing the tape as Riku came to sit on the bed and watch Sora's fingernails tear at the tape and then pry open the box, instantly getting a bundle of red rope and something black and round. Sora’s mouth hung open and he heard Riku exhale sharply beside him.

“That sounds about right,” Riku croaked, “Elrena’s big on bondage.” He took the rope and looked it over. The rope was corded and red, made from a soft material and one of Elrena’s personal favorites. However, he looked over at the thing Sora was holding and tried to gauge his reaction. It was a leather choker, cold and imposing in Sora’s hands.

“Wow,” Sora breathed. He turned it over in his hands and then, before Riku could really react, Sora snapped the choker around his throat and then stood up to look in the vanity mirror, running fingers down it with a soft breath. “Wow,” he repeated, a positively massive smile brightening up the room. “It’s so pretty.” he said.

Riku looked at the reflection for a too-long moment in silence before he realized his stomach had knotted. He’d never seen Sora experimenting in person before, and the realization made him feel almost guilty, like he couldn’t do it without a computer screen being the barrier of privacy between them. He looked over at the silken garments and then frowned.

“I can leave the room if you want to try these on,” he said, handing them to Sora, who looked them over and then down at his oversized t-shirt and boxer briefs hidden beneath it.

“Would you mind?” Sora asked and Riku smiled, “Not at all.” He left the room without a word and let Sora try on his clothes. At least, that was the plan, until it was ten minutes later. Riku sat at the kitchen island and hummed, tapping his fingers along the countertop. Was Sora alright? His foot started tapping next, running his fingers through his hair in boredom. At the very least, Sora seemed comfortable with the things he’d been given so that was a plus.

But as the time ticked down to fifteen minutes, Riku chewed on his lip. Was...Sora trying them out in a  _ different  _ way? He supposed it would be fine if he was... _ enjoying _ himself, on his bed. But on the other hand, the guilt came back and gnawed at him as he tried to brush away the thoughts. There was a noise, a creak of wood, and then a tiny little knock on the inside of his bedroom door. “Um...Riku? Can you come help me?” he asked.

Riku blinked and then slid from the island stool, knocking on the bedroom door and stepping inside. Sora sat on the bed, in nothing but the black panties. He at least  _ tried  _ to slide on the leggings and gloves but they were bunched and stuck and barely moved up his body. Sora wasn’t used to tight nylon? Riku stepped closer and then took one of the stockings in hand. Bunching the fabric up, Riku carefully pinched the curled fabric and then slid it up carefully, moving to the next bunch and smoothing it down like an inchworm.

The first stocking went up easily past the knee and Riku began to move to the second stocking with careful fingers. He knelt down on the floor for a better angle and watched as Sora lifted his foot just enough for Riku to bunch the fabric properly, tugging lightly and bringing it up along the calves as delicately as he could. He heard a soft sigh and fidgeting on the bed as Sora threw an arm back to hold himself up with the mattress.

Riku smiled and finished bringing the stocking up past the second knee, moving to stand up when he paused and turned his gaze towards something out of the corner of his eye. The panties really didn’t leave anything up to the imagination, an obvious bulge right there on display, something a little bit  _ more  _ than a simple bump. Riku swallowed hard and stood up far too quickly, working to grab the gloves and taking the right hand carefully.

The silk felt wonderful in his hand, warmed by Sora’s skin. He focused hard on adjusting the glove to work it high above the elbow but he couldn’t drag his eyes away enough to miss the way a blue-eyed gaze was glued to the side of his face. It wasn’t until he leaned to the side to work on the second glove did something change. He heard another soft sigh and then felt a forehead against his shoulder, delicate and shy.

“Are you alright?” Riku asked. Sora gave a weak little nod and then, with a gloved hand, he carefully placed it on top of the shoulder his forehead was resting on.

“I had a good day,” he said quietly, his breath shaking against Riku’s bare chest. The glove slipped above the elbow and Riku simply stood there, unsure of what to do. Sora was breathing strangely and trembling and that tan skin felt flushed against his body. Sora was blushing. 

“I can leave the room again if you--”

“No,” Sora said, swallowing hard. Riku felt eyes squeeze shut, and then Sora took a step back so he could look up at Riku fully. As expected, those cheeks were  _ red,  _ and Sora looked like he was about to faint with how hard he was shaking. “No, don’t, I just…” He chewed on his cheek and then fidgeted with his gloved hands, wringing them together nervously. “I just…” Sora took a deep breath and exhaled, pressing a hand to his chest for a moment and then delicately reaching forward to grab at Riku’s hands, holding them with his. “You’ve been really kind to me and I...I don’t know how to say thank you.”

Riku looked down at their hands intertwined and laughed gently, “But you just did.”

“No, I-I need to do more, I have too,” he said quietly, and then with a quick dart of his tongue, he looked up at Riku and shrunk in on himself. “Could...I mean, if you  _ want _ to, do you…?” Riku sat there in silence and waited for Sora to explain himself but he never did. Instead, Sora sucked in a sharp breath and stood up on his tippy toes, planting a sloppy peck of a kiss against Riku’s lips.

The world went still.

He sucked in a sharp breath. The feeling of lightly chapped lips against his own was shocking, as was the entirety of the whole situation. Sora stood there, in lingerie, pressing lips to his in a messy show of appreciation, and all Riku could do was sit there and blink, stunned in that moment until Sora pulled away just as quickly as he'd lunged forward. Sora exhaled quickly and found his way to the bed, sitting down and hiding his face slowly in his hands.

Riku still stood there, dumbfounded, until he sank beside Sora onto the bed and stared ahead at his wall. “Um…” he started, but found he hadn’t the words, just the remnant of tingling on his lips. Sora sucked in a loud, shaky breath and then released it into a broken laugh, dropping his hands to instead cover his mouth.

“I kissed you,” he croaked, slowly turning to look at Riku with a red face. “I...I’m so sorry, I don’t...I didn’t mean to.”

Riku swallowed a few times against a dry throat and then reached over, silently holding Sora's hand without looking at him. Sora simply held it back, feeling his heart slamming up into his own throat. His vision grew spotty around the edges and he forced himself,  _ hard,  _ to relax and lower his level of panic. Streaming, he could do, but sitting next to the man he kissed? He trembled at the prospect, a fool of his own making. He half expected Riku to throw him out, to tell him to leave, to get up and sleep on the couch--he did none of that.

Instead, he simply shuffled a little closer and rested his head on top of Sora’s, chin burrowing a little as he spoke, “You’re welcome.”


	6. So far Gone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He turned his head upwards and got a whiff of cologne from Riku’s neck, watching as Riku looked down to meet his gaze. There was something in Sora’s eyes Riku couldn’t quite place but he knew it as genuine. Genuine honesty. Adoration. Love. And then Sora snorted, a quiet little sound as he angled his chin towards the floor and shrugged, drawing in on himself as they worked back to a slow dancing rhythm. “I lost everything, Riku. So...let me be selfish for once and have you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone, sorry for the short chapter. Life's been a rollercoaster and not the fun one, between medical issues, verge of homelessness, and essentially overloading myself with work, things have been...hectic. Thank you all for being patient with me! Almost at the end, now.
> 
> I also want to thank everybody who's drawn fanart or written little fics for me because of Camboy. I tend to keep to myself and hide away on a Private twiiter due to the fandom being extremely aggressive towards NSFW content. I don't always ee the posts but please note that when I get DM'd and told about things, it makes my heart so happy.
> 
> Truthfully, I've felt really shitty about this fic. I never expected people to *read* it, let alone enjoy it, and knowing people get happy when it updates and tell their friends or drop it in servers? I've never expected that kind of reaction, and I'm afraid of letting people down. I love you all, and I want to say that without everyone letting me know how much they enjoyed it, I probably never would've updated. And I'm sorry for thinking that way. Camboy has been a labor of love and I...haven't felt the love towards it in a while. I hope to get that spark back one day soon. The resolution is very close, and I want to have the same love for it I had at the start to finish it off right.
> 
> @Vanplitwo on Twitter

Four months had passed since the night at the sex toy shop. The police hadn’t been able to find any leads on the thief who broke into Sora’s apartment, and deciding that it would be best if Sora stayed someplace safe, Riku opened his home permanently. In that time, they became unlikely roommates while they waited for more leads or information. Most of the time, Sora slept on the couch or the pull-out bed that came with it, but it wasn’t uncommon for Riku to wake up in the middle of the night to the bed being shifted as Sora snuck into the other side and tugged the blankets up to his chin as quietly as possible.

Winter came and went, and with it, the warmth of spring began to erupt in the town. Riku still attended school, Roxas came over every Friday to study, and later in the night, Riku would drop Sora off at his friend’s house to stream and pick him up afterwards. It went from awkward to routine within the first few weeks and somehow, Riku loved it. Roxas and Riku would study and pick at pizza while Sora sat on Riku’s laptop and studied up on techniques and ‘camming’ details, such as his statistics, watching other streams, and the like.

As promised, Roxas was cool about the whole thing and decided to never pop his head in stream while Sora stayed with Riku, partially because Sora was a great guy in person and Roxas started becoming good friends with him and the problem: Sora was losing followers steadily as the weeks went on. He was a handsome male: a tapered waist, a plump ass, and eyes that glowed an ethereal blue in the ring lights he had set up for his streams. Sora was  _ gorgeous  _ when he performed, but people’s attention was falling elsewhere.

New flavors of the week came and went. People started discovering new streamers and Sora’s fanbase thinned. It was something Riku noticed first when the regulars stopped popping in chat one evening in March. Regulars not showing up was a common occurrence; people didn’t show up to  _ every  _ stream. But it was when a  _ lot  _ of regulars stopped appearing that he grew concerned. Sora had been in the middle of deepthroating a new toy in his lingerie he’d purchased from the store months back when Riku clicked a new tab open and perused the chat list.

The numbers had thinned considerably, and with it, the donations. 

The first few streams, Sora had made serious bank for a newcomer. But as the weeks went by, the donations came less and less and Sora’s enthusiasm, though it didn’t falter on stream, started to disappear more and more on the car rides home. Sora would be distant and quiet, staring out the window and curled up on his side with his arms crossed and Riku didn’t pry. Some days, Sora would talk about his worries and fears, and other days, he would fall silent, lost in his own thoughts. It wasn’t until one evening after a stream, sitting in Riku’s bed and watching a movie on a DVD player, takeout in hand, that Sora sighed and stuck his fork in the container.

“Do you think I’m boring?” Sora asked. Riku looked over in offense and fumbled for the remote to pause, angling his leg so he could turn and face Sora fully.

“No, what makes you think that?” he asked. Sora frowned, rubbing his fingers along the hem of one of Riku’s shirts he was currently wearing, thumb pressing along an old bleach stain in the brown fabric. 

“I just-the streams haven’t been doing well. I don’t know how much time I have left doing it. I think people are bored of me.”

“That’s not it,” Riku said, forking his own container and putting it on the bedside table beside himself, turning back to Sora. “I told you, camming is fickle business; people find new streamers and go see what they’re about. The more people know about the site, the more people wanna try their hand at making a quick buck or being themself.”

“ _ I’m _ being myself,” Sora sniffed indignantly, “But I guess I’ve, uh, wore out my welcome, huh…?”

“No, it’s not like that!” Riku said, shaking his head. “It’s just...hard to be a solo artist. You spoke to Elrena, right? I’m sure she gave you her chat information. You could always chat with them and see what they suggest; majority of them, her included, are solo artists. If you could garner attention again, you’d get back on track with donations and we could figure things out throughout the week, see what trial and error we can come up with.”

“That won’t bother you? I know you’re busy-”

“Spring Break is in a few days, I’ll have plenty of time. So no, I’m not bothered. Tomorrow, you can use my laptop and see if they can’t help you. But for now, let’s eat dinner before it gets cold. We can talk about this after we eat if it still bothers you, alright?”

“Yeah,” Sora agreed, giving a nod. Riku always knew what to say. He took a bite, watching as Riku pressed play on the movie, and watching as he settled back against the pillows. He was such a beautiful, caring person and he didn’t even realize. Sora wondered if Riku saw the same features in him.

As promised the next morning, Riku went to take a shower and Sora turned on the coffee pot and grabbed the laptop, typing in the code Elrena gave him and hesitated with his finger over the enter key. He could do this. He liked Elrena, she was nice enough. He could absolutely just...talk to others.

He swallowed and pressed enter, watching as the dark mode website loaded and opened up a new window where he was entered into the ‘Organization of Orgies.” He couldn’t help but laugh and looked over as the chat room started moving.

IceQueen: Look who it is!

AnSub: The fresh meat arrives

Xemnissionary: Be kind

IceQueen: Coming from  _ you?  _ Hard pass.

Brickwallop: this the one you talked about?

IceQueen: Yup, he was the one who stopped by the store a few months back. What took you so long?

Sora frowned and started typing away.

SleepingKeyhole: I don’t have my own computer so I haven’t been able to get online. I don’t mean to just show up and ask you guys questions but I need some advice.

IceQueen: Ew why?

Brickwallop: Elrena, hush

IceQueen: Up yours, shithouse.

MinorIllusion: Elrena, please stop calling him that

IceQueen: Down yours, bookworm

Moonshine: Enough. This chatroom is supposed to have some semblance of professionalism and I can see that that isn’t going to happen today.

_ Moonshine has logged off. _

AnSub: The pretentious prick is gone, we’re free.

Xemnissionary: We’ve gone over this, love, he’s just being moody as per usual

Ansub: I could do without his attitude

Sora frowned at the screen. He’d only been in the chatroom for a few minutes and already caused discord between the members. He glanced towards the bathroom and heard the shower still going, turning his attention back towards the chatroom.

MinorIllusion: What can we help you with, by the by?

IceQueen: Ugh

MinorIllusion: What? He asked for help, I’d like to do just that if I can.

IceQueen: I met him, he’s a cute little brunette twink in the flesh, probably just wants some more extra condoms

Sora looked at the screen and then covered his mouth, stifling a laugh. He still had them stored away, and though he used a few of them on stream, he couldn’t help but get a kick out of that, typing carefully and fighting off the giggles.

SleepingKeyhole: No it’s not that lol I just um

SleepingKeyhole: I started losing watchers like crazy and I don’t know what to do as a solo cammer. I don’t wanna stop doing streams but I don’t know what to do.

IceQueen: Oh geeze. Hey Thing 1 and Thing 2, this is yours

AnSub: Are you Thing 1 or am I Thing 1, dear?

Xemnissionary: Depends on if you’ve behaved if you’re first or not

MinorIllusion: Oh here we go

AnSub: Well, you could always collaborate, that’s what Xem and I did. Two solo artists playing together tends to open up a dynamic

Xemnissionary: While the website itself does demand some anonymity, between cammers, that line is very gray. A lot of us live nearby or within a few hours of each other, it would be possible to look up an artist you enjoy personally and ask them for a...play date

AnSub: It’s disgusting then you call it that

Xemnissionary: Perhaps, but you didn’t seem to have qualms about it

AnSub: Maybe I do regret our relationship after all

IceQueen: I regret all of you fuckers in my CHATROOM

Brickwallop: Elrena, have you had your iced coffee today?

IceQueen: You know DAMN well I fucking haven’t

_ Brickwallop has logged off. _

IceQueen: Brb, brick shithouse is gonna get me coffee <3

Xemnissionary: Regardless, collaborations are your best bet. If playing solo isn’t working out, perhaps it’s because you’ve lost your luster--or never had it to begin with.

Sora frowned. People liked when he played at first; he was unique, he was fresh, he was...he was new. People had seen all they wanted from him and were now trying to find someone who filled their niche. Collaborating would be good but he wasn’t sure he could do something sexual with someone else on stream. Besides, who did he know that could even…?

Sora paled and turned towards the shower. Riku...he couldn’t subject him to that. He nervously burrowed his fingers in his hair and looked back at the laptop with a scowl. Riku was a mod, their relationship or lack thereof aside, how could he possibly ask him something like that? It wasn’t like the website would allow it. To make matters worse, Sora was doing his best to try and  _ not  _ admit to himself he was developing a huge crush on Riku. He wanted to believe it was his body getting confused; after all, Riku had opened his home, had opened his heart, was delicate and patient with Sora. He was kind and generous and  _ perfect  _ to Sora and that...that was the  _ issue. _

He couldn’t stop staring at him, couldn’t stop thinking about him or his voice or his soft hair or his warm body whenever Sora sidled into bed without Riku knowing--he hoped. It wasn’t his fault he was still afraid to sleep in the living room, but he didn’t really feel any better being given permission to join Riku. It felt  _ right  _ and because it felt  _ right  _ he knew it was  _ wrong.  _ Riku was comfortable to lay beside. He made soft noises in his sleep and twitched, curling on his side and sometimes against Sora.

But to make matters worse, just hanging out with Riku felt  _ domestic.  _ He brought food, and oftentimes on his way home from school he’d bring home a coffee for Sora, just how he liked it. They watched Sora’s favorite movies and ate Sora’s favorite ice cream and Riku, god fucking bless his stupid heart of gold, would even let Sora wear his old clothes  _ because they were a color or texture Sora liked.  _ Riku was stupid and Sora was stupid for  _ liking _ him.

And now, he was staring at the shower, halfway torn between asking to join, knowing it could probably get him thrown out. Riku naked was nothing he’d never seen before but outside of a photograph, he didn’t know. He’d seen him shirtless and that was enough to make him agonize for weeks. What did he look like without pants, without underwear, naked and bared and  _ pierced,  _ because of course he was. How soft were the coarse hairs down his pelvis, how firm were his muscles, truly? Sora didn’t know.

Sora  _ needed  _ to know.

As if on cue, the shower squeaked off and within a few minutes of muted rustling, Sora thanked the streamers and told them he’d return later, closing the website and the laptop just as Riku stepped out from the bathroom in a cloud of steam. Today, the bastard decided to wear a white tank top with little cartoon pineapples, green socks, and grey sweatpants, which left nothing to the imagination, Sora discovered, the prominent bulge just  _ there.  _ Riku shook some wet strands from his forehead and greeted Sora with a cheerful wave, turning his attention to the coffee pot which finished percolating.

“Want a cup?” he asked, and Sora hummed briefly before nodding.

“Yeah, please.”  
“Cat cup or…” Riku shuffled in the cupboards and the sound of porcelain clinking was heard, “Weird ant creature?”

“Got that Christmas mug clean?”

“The one with the humping reindeer?” Riku asked with a snort, showing the brown cup to Sora who laughed and nodded. The reindeer weren’t humping but the art certainly made it appear that way, becoming a source of joy for Sora. Riku laughed through his nose and started pouring a cup for Sora, who shuffled nervously.

“I, um, need to ask you something important but I’m nervous.”

“Oh?” Riku asked, dragging his cup over towards the pot and filling it second, tipping his head a little to make sure both cups were as close to even as could be, “Is it because it’s a bad thing or a good thing?” 

“Um...depends on how you see it.”

Riku spun and reached for the creamer in the fridge, finishing off their coffees and recapping the liquid, stuffing it back in the fridge and shutting it with his foot. “Well, I wouldn’t know if it’s good or bad unless I’m asked.”

“It’s…” Sora frowned, looking at the cup handed to him and reaching for the sugar. “I spoke to the chatroom Elrena gave me.”

“And?” Riku asked as he reached for the sugar jar and a spoon, “You don’t look very enthusiastic. Was she mean to you? She’s a bit bitchy but she doesn’t mean it to offend, she’s-”

“No, no, it’s n-not that it’s um…” Sora took in a breath and nervously ran his fingers through his hair to rest at the back of his skull. “How would you feel about, um...camming with me one time?”

Riku froze. He had spilled some sugar on the table and simply stared at Sora with wide eyes, lips parted. “...what?”

Sora exhaled sharply and shook his head quickly, dismissively. “I just--you don’t  _ need  _ to, they just recommended a collab and I don’t know anybody else, and I thought-”

“Sora, I can’t,” Riku replied far too quickly. Sora’s face fell. He didn't mean to upset Riku, he got his answer already. No harm done.

“Because you’re a mod, I know. I just thought, if you had your face covered or your voice altered, m-maybe-”

Riku remained still for a long while before he sighed, stirring some sugar into his coffee finally and then getting up to wipe up the sugar in silence. For a long moment, Sora didn’t know what to do. He’d already angered Riku enough, how could he even apologize to him? 

Riku scrunched his eyebrows and opened his mouth but Sora jumped first, nervously rambling and trying to solve the problem by vomiting up his entire feelings trying to placate the situation. “I-I mean, I figured that since you let me stay here, outside of chores and stuff I haven’t really repaid you-”

“Sora-”

“-and I figured that maybe I could show you my thanks the only way I know how. I can’t really buy you anything, and I’m a bad cook, and I-”

“Now hang on-”

“-thought maybe, you know, you wouldn’t say no to me maybe sucking you off. On stream. O-Or maybe not even on stream, I mean I could do it now but I should brush my teeth first and-”

“ _ Sora!” _

Sora winced and froze, hunching his head between his shoulders. Riku raised a hand and rubbed at his forehead with a deep sigh. Riku looked over at the absolute kicked puppy sitting at his table and sighed again, leaning back in his chair with a squeak. “Sora…” Riku sighed again, and carefully he rested the crook of his elbow to the top of the table, giving Sora an exasperated look. “Isn’t this going too far too fast?”

“I...I mean,  _ yeah _ , b-but it doesn’t have to be  _ that  _ it could be anything else, I just-”

“That’s not what I mean,” Riku said, rubbing at the back of his neck and fluffing the still-damp strands. “You don’t need to repay me for anything, I’m sure you’d do the same for me if I were in your shoes and if circumstances aligned.”

“But-”

Riku raised his finger, silencing Sora immediately. “ _ But _ ...while I appreciate you trying to use your, ah, skills to show me thanks, I would prefer if we could go on a proper date  _ first  _ and  _ then  _ we can do things….your way.”

Sora stared for a long moment, sitting there and blinking. Was he insinuating…? “Did...you just ask me out?”

“No,” he said, watching Sora take in a breath. “You’d know if I was.” And with that, he took a sip of his coffee and stood up, leaving Sora at the table for a long while as he went into his bedroom and shut the door. Sora simply stared at the door for a long time and then the patterns on the table, clenching his fists over the top. He’d really messed things up, hadn’t he? Riku didn’t look upset but getting angry wasn’t his way. Still, Riku getting up without a word and  _ shutting his door _ , something he didn’t do unless he was asleep, felt wrong to Sora, and the guilt settled into his stomach like a stone.

He’d been about to get up and go for a walk when the door opened and Sora absolutely hesitated. Riku came out in a different outfit entirely. A white v-neck shirt, blue jean capris that went to the low part of his calf and, Sora sinfully noticed, wrapped three times on each thigh with  _ belts.  _ To make it worse, it was accompanied by belted combat boots, and what looked like a hoodie made from leather over Riku’s arm, a gingham trailing and gold buttons, being handed off to Sora.

“Get dressed,” Riku said, “We’re going out.”

  
  


_ Out,  _ as it was, ended with them at the docks of the closest beach a half hour away. From the car, Sora could see the faint lights of a ferris wheel, cycling above the roofs and displays of carnival games and stuffed animal mountains, strung up with netting. The ocean breeze could be smelled from the car, overpowering the cherry air freshener hanging from the rearview mirror. Riku pulled into a parking spot and then piled out, heading towards the boardwalk.

“Why are we here?” Sora asked and Riku could only give a little shrug, looking over at Sora wearing his hoodie and having it look gigantic on him. Charming, really, and nothing short of.

“It’s a carnival,” Riku said, “We’re here so you can have fun.”

“But I-”  
“There’s another reason but I can’t tell you that quite yet.” Riku instead reached for Sora’s hand and gave it a little squeeze, pointing towards the brightly lit stalls. “In the meantime, we’re going to get lunch, we’re going to play some games, and we’re going to have a good time.”

A good time meant corndogs, cotton candy, games of skeeball, archery galleries, and even ring tosses and basketball free throws, though neither boy was any good. Still, by the first few batches of games, Riku discovered Sora had a mean competitive streak, and the two ended up raising the stakes. ‘If I win, you gotta go get me a soda,’ and ‘if I win, you gotta run to the edge of the boardwalk as fast as you can for more tickets’. By the end of the night when the sun started to dip below the horizon, Riku looked up at the ferris wheel and pointed, watching as its lights finally started to glow against the darkening sky. “Wanna?”

“A ferris wheel? Sure, what’s it gonna be?”

“No challenge,” Riku said, “I just want to ride it with you.”

Sora watched as rainbows and shapes began to explode. The ferris wheel was igniting, making swirls, and pulses, and star-shapes as the lights cycled. Riku squeezed his hand again and Sora returned it in kind, walking down the far end of the boardwalk. They waited in line, the whole time Sora asking what kind of challenge it was and Riku constantly telling Sora there was no challenge, it was for fun. He didn’t realize why Sora was so insistent until they sat down and the handler shut the door and made sure it was locked.

“There’s no seat belts?” Sora asked, visibly distressed and looking around.

“No, there’s--” Riku frowned as realization dawned on him. “Sora, if you were scared you should’ve told me!”

“I didn’t want you to call me a coward for being afraid of a ride meant for  _ kids _ .”

“Sora, I would never...hey!” Riku shouted, flagging down the handler, but the man didn’t respond, instead flicking a lever and moving their cart to the left and upwards, preparing for the next rider. Sora gave a startled shout and practically flung himself to the floor, curling up in a ball. This only served to make things worse, making the cart careen and wobble side to side, making Sora tuck a little further. Riku glanced over at the handler, currently moving back to the lever, sending them a little higher.

“Sora, look at me.”

Sora didn’t for a moment, too busy gripping the ground for dear life. When his head raised, Sora watched as Riku sat down on the floor with him, patting his chest. “Don’t look over the cart, put your head right here and lift the hood over your head. Just focus on me.” It took a few seconds of Sora cautiously climbing over before the cart tipped, being moved upwards, and Sora yelped, practically flinging himself into Riku’s lap. He couldn’t do anything else than pet Sora’s hair and lightly brush fingers through it, quietly shh-ing him all the while.

“It’s okay, it only goes around three times. Can you hold on until then?” Riku asked. Sora gave a nod, forehead firmly pressed between Riku’s pecs, and Riku lifted the hood to cover Sora’s vision. “Do you want me to tell you a story so you have something to focus on?” Another nod, hands tightening into his shirt.

“Okay. When I was first moving here, I only knew Roxas, and he helped me pack up my entire bedroom and drive out here. One of the first things we did was go to this carnival. He told me there was this girl he liked and he hoped that he could ask her out at the end of the night at the top of the ferris wheel so that was the plan. I was lending him money so he could buy her food and toys and game tokens,” he said with a soft laugh and a fond smile on his face, watching as the cart began to slowly ascend upwards over the water.

“Well, by the end of the night, she was full of greasy food and couldn’t hold the stuffed animals he won for her and she was the happiest girl in the world. Until the ferris wheel. I sat on the opposite side and they sat together and held hands. The ferris wheel was getting higher and I could tell he was getting more nervous and right before he asked her, disaster struck. She saw the lights on the ocean and scooted over in the seat to look over the railing of the cart and, well, it seemed she brought an aunt with her.”

Sora snorted and Riku could feel ‘you’re awful’ against his chest and Riku laughed with a nod.

“Sorry, sorry, I don’t know how to make that sound  _ nice.  _ But...yeah, she had no idea. Roxas didn’t have any tact either and just blurted it out. She was so embarrassed that by the time the top of the ferris wheel hit, she was sobbing and neither of us could calm her down. She was wearing black so nobody else saw but the damage was done and visible on the seat, she was mortified. But there was one thing Roxas did to calm her down.”

Riku said nothing, looking over the top of the wheel cart as much as he could, trying to gauge how far up or down they truly were until Sora shifted his head upwards, seeing nothing but Riku. And Riku, he gave Sora a genuine smile, putting his hand beneath Sora’s chin and reaching forward to press their lips together.

It wasn’t any amazing kiss but it was enough to feel Sora’s heart hammering. The man on top of him tensed and gradually relaxed. Riku pulled back enough to look at Sora, rubbing his thumb beneath a teary eye. “He gave her a kiss,” Riku said quietly, “And after that, they’ve been inseparable.”

“Riku…”

Sora laughed, wiping at his eyes, “You’re so stupid, all this for a kiss?”

“No,” Riku replied, “I was going to wait until you had more corn dogs and funnel cakes so you’d be too full to run away.”

Sora laughed again, burying his face in Riku’s chest and raising the hood higher to fend off his rising blush.

They sat like that for two more cycles, enjoying the cool breeze and each other’s hearts beating.

  
  


The car ride home was quiet. Sora kept idly touching his lips when they tingled from the memory of the kiss and Riku focused far too hard on driving, the radio quiet and some pop song playing, drum beat barely audible. He hadn’t meant to kiss Sora, but at the very least, it stopped Sora from panicking until the ferris wheel came to a stop. Sora practically ran from the cart but he couldn’t blame him for that; had he known Sora was terrified of heights, he never would have asked him to ride. Still, he was grateful Sora  _ had,  _ the thought of those soft lips and the small gasp that sucked the breath from his mouth was everything he’d wanted and more.

But he knew Sora deserved better.

A carnival was fun, but it wasn’t  _ Riku.  _ Riku was softer, quiet, liked a peaceful life as opposed to the hustle and bustle of a crowded boardwalk and the scent of grease. Sora bared his heart to him--among other things--so he could do the same. He pulled into the driveway and they piled inside.

“Get in some comfy pajamas,” he said, hanging up his keys and unbuckling his boots.

“Why?” Sora asked, turning to find a hook on the door and hanging Riku’s hoodie from it. “It’s not the usual movie night, but I’d be fine with watching-”

“No, it’s something else I’d like to do with you,” Riku said, moving to his bedroom and stepping from his clothes. He swapped his jeans for blue plaid pajama bottoms and socks with tiny cat paws on the bottom, Sora’s favorite socks. Sora followed behind him and reached for his own pants after some shuffling in the drawers. He slipped on some yellow socks covered in pineapples and then red sweatpants.

“Do I need to grab the blankets?” Sora asked, but Riku left the room with a soft no, heading towards the living room. He pushed the coffee table over to the corner of the room and shut the entertainment center, instead moving to a small stereo and fumbling through some CDs. He slipped one in after some fumbling, and quiet music began to pour through the speakers. He moved to light a large candle on the coffee table and then moved to hit the lights, turning them down dimly. Riku outstretched his hand and Sora laughed nervously.

“Riku, I don’t dance.”

“Neither do I,” he said, taking Sora’s hand and then smiling. “Not anymore. I took eight years of ballet as a kid.”

“No fucking way,” Sora said, laugh growing as he was pulled into Riku’s chest. He held their hands to his chest, the other sliding down to rest on Sora’s lithe waist. 

“Yes, way,” Riku said, raising their arms into a bend to the side and swinging Sora slowly in a gradual rotation. “My parents wanted us to be active. One of my brothers chose lacrosse, and the other chose gymnastics. I was originally going to swim but after a few days I decided it wasn’t for me so I chose dance. Unfortunately, all they had was ballet at the time,” he said. As if to prove it, he turned his feet into points and bent his knees, taking Sora’s hand in an arch above his with a grin.

Sora’s laughter bubbled out and he moved back to touch chests, feeling the familiar waltz forming in his legs. One, two, three, one, two, three, it felt...comfortable. Easy, the music aiding their limbs. He felt like water, flowing and limber, despite not knowing a single thing about dancing. He trusted Riku, and it seemed like Riku trusted him, too, the way he led him around. He laughed quietly when Sora stepped on his foot or tripped in the movements or bumped his head to Riku’s chest.

“So why did you want to dance with me?” Sora asked after the third blunder in less than a minute, face sufficiently redder than his pants.

“I’m not one for big social gatherings,” Riku said, spinning just so to turn on the television and watching as it bathed the dark room in a soft silver light. It carved through Sora’s bangs, bringing his eyes aglow, so like the ring lights that surrounded them on Fridays. Beautiful. The warm lights from the candle only added to it, making his hair a soft reddish brown, highlighting Sora’s button nose and parted lips. “But, there’s one thing I  _ am  _ good for and it’s the sappy things in life. So, we’re dancing, at least until you tell me you’re sick of it.”

“Riku,” Sora pressed his head against Riku’s chest. The music was quiet but Rik’s heart was loud, hammering quickly. He played it off so well but he was  _ nervous.  _ He licked his lips and bit back a smile, wrapping his arms around Riku’s middle for a long moment before he couldn’t hold the smile back. “You like me.”

“I mean, yeah, of course I do, I just...it’s been a long time since anybody’s liked me. Since I liked anybody  _ back,  _ I just want to do it right by you.”

“You already have.”

“But...are you sure?”

The music lured onwards and whisked Sora to the beat, swaying side to side in Riku’s arms like they were at an old school dance but it didn’t matter. None of it mattered, at least, for the moment. With the lights down low, he could still make out the darkened cheeks of his ‘roommate’, the way that silver hair danced with every swing and sway. Riku’s hands were slightly clammy in Sora’s as he pulled back to hold them, even as Sora playfully twirled with a laugh and spun so he was back to chest with Riku, his own hands pressed to his chest. From there, Riku felt the soft beat of Sora’s heart as it anced to the music, a waltz in its own right, powerful and alluring.

_ More, I’m right here, follow my steps, love, do it right for me. _

“Are you sure that’s what you want?” Riku’s voice had lowered so it was only a few decibels higher than the soft music. It wavered in such a way Sora had never heard before and he smiled, giving a nod and sending brown hair billowing.

“Am I sure that I want to be with someone like you?”

“Yeah.”

“Riku,” Sora said, twirling back out and extending his hold so Riku’s arm outstretched. “Why wouldn’t I want to be with you? You’re cute,” Sora said, spinning so they were chest to chest, hands held tightly. “You’re sweet to me,” he pressed his temple to Riku’s chest and grinned at the feeling of that heart hammering beneath, “Anybody would be absolutely lucky to have you.”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


He turned his head upwards and got a whiff of cologne from Riku’s neck, watching as Riku looked down to meet his gaze. There was something in Sora’s eyes Riku couldn’t quite place but he knew it as genuine. Genuine honesty. Adoration.  _ Love.  _ And then Sora snorted, a quiet little sound as he angled his chin towards the floor and shrugged, drawing in on himself as they worked back to a slow dancing rhythm. “I lost everything, Riku. So...let me be selfish for once and  _ have you. _ ”

Riku was quiet for a long moment but what else could he be? He never thought months ago the camboy on his screen would be asking him out, twirling in his arms with pineapple socks and a goofy grin, laughter bubbling in his throat. He never thought that months ago he’d even meet Sora in person. He still felt ridiculous sending a nude but maybe all things happened for a reason; at least he tried to justify his actions. And Sora was right; Riku had seen Sora naked several times, a nude was the least he could send back. Everything happened for a reason and he still couldn’t believe one split second bad decision led him to the happiest he’d been in months.

He peered down at Sora who looked about on the verge to apologize, and all Riku thought to manage was a hesitant lean forward as he pressed his hands to Sora’s hips and then ducked down for a kiss. Sora more than eagerly returned it, bumping their foreheads a little and making them both grunt, but it was quickly stopped with a soft laugh through Riku’s nose and Sora’s mouth, calming his smile enough to return the kiss. Properly this time, delicately, soft lips slotting together. There was the slight discomfort of Sora’s chapped lips from him worriedly chewing them but it somehow added to the allure of him, that small uniqueness that made Sora  _ Sora.  _ Made Sora  _ his. _

Sora stilled beneath him as he focused more on the kiss than the music and that was more than fine. Riku raised his hands to comb through the back of Sora’s hair and lower to rest his palms against Sora’s cheeks, cupping them as he licked softly into Sora’s mouth. Sora made a soft noise in the back of his throat and parted his lips just enough to feel a tongue scraping along his, pulling back with a nervous laugh.

“What?”

“That’s  _ weird!”  _ Sora said, feeling the residual tingle along his tongue.

“Oh, I didn’t…”

“It’s fine,” Sora said, giving him a smile, “I’ve kissed before but I’ve never...you know.”

Riku looked at him for a long moment and leaned back down, pressing soft kisses to those dampened lips. Some were quicker, some lingered and pressed. He could feel Sora’s balance starting to waver from standing on his tippy toes, and with a tender sound of a final kiss, he broke from Sora with lidded eyes, pupils blown wide in the dim of the room.

“I could teach you,” he said quietly, tipping his head slightly towards the couch. Sora was still struggling to breathe and stared up at him for a long second. His tongue darted out to taste the lingering flavor of Riku on his lips and he gave a little nod.

“Yeah...please.”

He took Sora’s hand in his and led him to the couch where Sora sat down and immediately curled up almost nervously into a ball. Riku laughed and rubbed his thumb along the knuckles of Sora’s hand. “You can’t tell me you’re afraid of learning how to kiss after every single Friday?”

“No, it’s not that,” Sora said, tucking some bangs behind his ear but they didn’t stay long, flopping back into his face. “What if I’m bad at it?”

“Everybody is bad at it the first time. I had to be taught.”

“No way.”  
“Way. Why is it so surprising?”

Sora shrugged and looked down at the couch cushion. “You just...seem like you got your life together. You have a house, a job, and a car. You go to college and you can cook and you do  _ laundry.  _ Nobody wants to do laundry unless they’re at gunpoint.”

Riku snorted and pressed his lips to Sora’s knuckles this time, a shake of his head. “You’re a dork. How about this: you kiss  _ me  _ and I’ll learn from  _ you.  _ You set the pace and mood, okay? Just close your eyes and feel it out.”

“But…” Sora inhaled and nervously twirled his fingers into the hem of his shirt. “I...could you actually show me first and then I could go from there?”

Riku raised a hand to cup Sora’s cheek and smiled, stroking his thumb along that soft skin. “Sure, if that’d make you comfortable. Just close your eyes and feel. I can’t do many things well-”

“Bull.”

“-but I can at  _ least  _ kiss you enough for you to learn. Who knows, you might be a natural. You seemed pretty confident with your mouth on stream.”

Sora snorted at that and failed to hide a nervous grin. “That’s different, not having a gag reflex doesn’t mean I’m  _ good  _ at it, it just means I have an...unfair advantage.”

“I’m sure the toy was suffering over that fact.”

“Just shut up and kiss me,” Sora said with a louder laugh, bringing his forehead to the center of that solid chest.

“Alright, alright, fine.”

He pried Sora’s face off of his chest and smiled down at him, cupping his face like he had at the ferris wheel, bringing his lips close to hover inches from Sora’s own. “Are you sure?”

Sora smiled and closed the distance, a gentle press of lips enough to ghost over Riku’s own. “Please.”

With a soft motion, Riku closed the distance and pressed his mouth to Sora’s, whose mouth melded perfectly against his own, closing all the gaps. There was another soft noise in the back of Sora’s throat and he adjusted carefully on the couch to get more comfortable. Small arms wrapped around Riku’s neck and Riku’s hands sidled down to rest against the sides of Sora’s neck.

Riku’s heart was hammering in his chest but he hoped that Sora couldn’t hear it. The music was still playing and the candles were still flickering and warming the room in a soft orange glow, but for once, Riku didn’t feel comfortable in his own house. He felt giddy and awkward like a teenager with his first love, felt silly and awkward and clumsy, heart too big for his body and laughing off the tightness in his jeans. He felt happy and nervous all in one, the smell of old carnival grease and faint shampoo and  _ Sora,  _ addictingly sweet and overwhelming his senses.

His hands slid back just enough to scratch at the soft brown wafts of hair at the back of Sora’s neck and he felt the shiver beneath his fingertips, Sora laughing. The kiss deepened with Sora’s eagerness, and the press of lips grew insistent though it was obvious Sora didn’t know what the next logical step was. Riku pulled back just enough for him to breathe the words ‘let me in’ over Sora’s lips, and when Sora made a small noise, Riku tipped his head and dipped his tongue in to claim that mouth for his own. Sora sighed and melted, this time tasting the weird wetness of Riku’s tongue against his own, giving a few tentative strokes back to test the waters.

“Just like that,” Riku said, smiling as he pulled back enough to let Sora breathe. “It’s not so hard, right?”

“‘S weird,” Sora giggled, “But it’s nice, I like it.”

“I’m glad.”

“...well don’t stop on  _ my  _ account,” Sora tugged insistently at Riku’s shirt around his back and Riku rolled his eyes playfully, bringing his lips back to Sora properly. There was no time for teaching Sora when he knew the brunette could learn on the fly. Hungry hands tugged at the back of Sora’s hair and fisted in those strands, tipping Sora’s neck back enough for Riku to take control of the rhythm. His tongue probed deep and entangled with Sora’s own, making the brunette muffle a truly delicious moan against his mouth.

“Mmph!” Sora’s fingers dug deep into the fabric of Riku’s shirt and pulled enough for Riku to need to lean forward and follow through, throwing out his arms to catch himself and gripping tight to his couch cushions.

“Sora!”

The kiss broke but Sora wasn’t done. Riku could feel the slickness of Sora’s sweat clinging tight to skin as arms wrapped around the bare skin of Riku’s shoulders. They slipped down his shirt and blunt nails scraped down flesh enough for Riku to shiver with a soft moan. Blue eyes widened at the sound. Sora gulped in labored breaths but his fingers spoke of a deeper urgency. It wasn’t just a kiss anymore; Riku could feel a stronger connection between them that had gone further than a crush, than love, than anything he’d ever felt. 

Riku felt  _ happy.  _ Riku felt utterly in love with this man. 

Sora dove in for another kiss and fingers gripped at the collar of Riku’s shirt, and then again. It was only until the third pluck did Riku break the kiss again with an audible slip, prying himself up onto his knees to slip fingers at the hem of his shirt and pull it off, tossing it to the ground. “Happy?”

“So damn happy,” Sora breathed, racing fingers up to press and kneed at every mound of flesh he could find. Abs were somehow both soft  _ and  _ hard, muscular pecs firm with give. Beneath Sora’s palm, he rolled the hard nubs of those nipples and felt the metallic breach of piercings beneath them. Riku simply watched with parted lips before he grunted in surprise.

There was the feeling of heat around his nipple, the tip of a skilled tongue rolling and sliding along the bar of the piercing. Riku’s jaw clicked shut with a snap and he dropped his head while Sora played around. “I don’t...I don’t think this is a kiss.”

“You said, and I quote, ‘You set the pace and the mood’ or something. So, I am.” A cheeky little nip, getting a warning “Sora’ from above him. Sora replied in kind with a gentle laugh, bringing chapped lips to the valley of Riku’s pecs. His hands followed upwards, running up and down those trembling abs before he paused. “Uh...oh. Haha, hi there, buddy.”

“Huh?”

Riku lowered his head to see what sparked the comment and gasped, quickly bringing it back up to eye level with Sora and a frown. “What did you expect was going to happen, Sora? You’re hard, too.”

“Well, yeah, but it’s my first makeout. Besides,” Sora grinned, “I’m a camboy, I’m  _ supposed  _ to get excited when I play with things.” Those hands lowered enough to press along the cotton waistband of Riku’s pajama bottoms and the grin slid only slightly. Nails scraped along the top of the fabric in a tease and Sora angled his head to look back up into pale green eyes. “And, well…” The fingers tugged minutely, enough to bring a slash of happy trail visible over the rim of the bottoms, making Sora snap them back to Riku’s hips in an excited fluster, “I  _ like  _ having all eyes on me.”

“Do you even know what you’re asking?” Riku asked quietly, unsure if Sora even heard it over the hammering of his heart right above him. “It was just supposed to be a kiss and I-”  
“I _wanted _this, Riku.”

“I can see that, but-”

Sora shushed him and released the grip from his waistband, inhaling and shuffling on the couch a little before he slipped from underneath Riku and stood up straight, clasping his hands behind his back. “Well, how about a little bit of familiarity?”

Riku sat back on his knees and pressed his hands onto his thighs. “What do you mean?”

“Well,” Sora shuffled in place and laughed, “How about...you do what you normally do while I stream and I’ll...get into the role?”

“Sora, not for nothing but...can you wait a second?”

“Okay?”

Riku exhaled and shook the bangs from his face. “I think we’re rushing into sex, don’t you?”

Sora laughed again and shook his head. “I don’t want sex, not yet, not until you do. I-I mean that’s if  _ you _ want to sometime, I...I’d like to do what I asked of you this morning. But...to practice. If it’s alright. I figured the mood is right and you said you didn’t just want to do it until we were dating, and I-” 

“Sora.”

Sora’s head lowered and he sighed, opening his mouth in time for Riku to place a hand to that mess of brown hair. “Look, I...it’s been a while and I don’t want you to feel like you’re going to make a mistake. You said it yourself, you haven’t had sex before, and a blowjob isn’t the same as your toys. I don’t want you to hurt yourself or end up hating it or rushing into it because you think it’ll make me happy.”

“...will it?”

Riku exhaled. “Is this what you want?”

Sora nodded and placed a hand back to the waistband though he didn’t stray further. “I do. I’m sorry, I don’t know how to ask for it properly. I feel stupid.”

“Don’t. Honestly. I...alright.” Riku looked down at his lap and frowned, bringing his gaze back up to Sora, who happened to follow his gaze southward, obviously intrigued by what he saw. “We can try.” He picked nervously at the waistband with a finger himself and then looked at Sora. “If you don’t like it or if it feels weird, just stop. I want  _ you  _ to be happy and have fun, too.”

“Riku, I’ve thought about doing this since I was a teenager. It’s why I practiced so much; I wanted to be good for whoever loved me enough to want to be with me. I might not have experience but I have  _ experience.  _ And I want to experience it with  _ you.”  _ Sora smiled and looked back down at Riku, slipping off the couch and properly on his knees, shuffling closer to the couch and looking at Riku expectantly. 

Riku’s heart hammered and he hesitated. Was this really happening? It’s not like it was something he never had done before but he was young, too, and his memory was hazy. He remembered not liking it, the girl he thought he liked was inexperienced and the remnants of  _ teeth _ left a lasting impression. But he realized that life came at him fast and that he didn’t like girls like he  _ thought  _ he did, And now, he was staring down into beautiful blue eyes, a too-big shirt on a lithe frame, and a smile that brightened his dim living room.

“Well...how about a bet then? You seemed to like them earlier,” Sora asked, looking up at Riku. Sora’s hand gripped the edge of one of the couch cushions and he smiled, watching as Riku slid his legs off the couch and widened his stance just so, face red even in the darkness of the room.

“What?”

“Well,” Sora's fingers twitched against the strings of Riku's pants he grabbed in a death grip. “How about it? I mean, only if you want to, I just thought--”

“No, I know. I get it.” Riku's cock twitched against the confines and he caught Sora's throat bob in a swallow. Both dropped their attention southward in the motion and Riku took a shaky inhale. Even though Sora had seemed more than willing and honest about his intentions, he still couldn't believe he was staring at the man that was once on his screen right between his thighs, kneeling in front of Riku lounging on the couch. Staring at those well-kept nails scratching at the strings of Riku’s pajama bottoms.

“S-So, about that bet...?”

“Right! Okay, so here it is,” The knot of the strings came free with a tease and a tug, the tightness disappearing from his hips just enough for a brief semblance of comfort. Sora's finger slid in between the gap of the seam and stroked at the hardness beneath the gray boxer briefs in little circles. Riku sucked in a shuddering breath and watched those blue eyes haze over. “I bet you I could deep throat you, piercings and all without gagging, all the way down.”

A shudder rippled down Riku's spine and he knew Sora could probably feel it. “And if you can't...?”

Sora hummed in thought and let his finger slide down to the bottom of the seam, releasing it with a flourish before moving to pry the halves of the pants wider apart. There, on perfect display with no obstructions, laid Riku's bulge pressed tight to his thigh, the gray fabric stretched taut in the strain. Sora''s hand moved up to slip beneath the waistband and wiggle softly in a teasing motion. It worked; between the mist in his thoughts and the heat pooling lower, Riku could only focus on the ministrations of the brunette in front of him, hiding a grin poorly with his bangs.

“If I can't...then how about you let me practice? On stream.”

“...you were serious about that.”

“As serious as I could ever be.”

Riku swallowed through a dry throat and shuffled nervously. He was harder than he’d been in his life and Sora was just  _ beaming  _ up at him like Riku held the world on his shoulders. Mystified and  _ horny,  _ but excited all the while. And Riku, he could only sit there dumbfounded while Sora simply dropped his gaze and  _ salivated.  _ “Should I…?” Riku placed his fingers at the edge of his waistband and Sora nodded hard enough that Riku was sure he heard that neck crack.

“Okay…” Riku took a nervous breath and lifted his ass, pressing his elbows into the couch as he slid down his pants, taking his underwear with it. It snagged along the tip of his cock but it sprang free with a slap and Sora shuffled in place. Riku pulled the garments to his knees and watched as Sora urgently pulled them down further, down his legs, letting them pool at his feet above his ankles.

Sora simply gawked.

Riku’s cock was beautiful. Thick and impressive, little veins stretching over the bulge where the three bars of piercings resided. The tip was rosy red and looked soft, the small slit at the top drawing Sora’s eye. A cautious hand raised and touched the firm flesh and stroked down the barbells, the mixture of soft and firm felt good on Sora’s fingertips. The cock twitched and Riku sucked in a breath at the feeling.

“Is this okay? I thought you said you did this before,” Sora teased, going in for a second stroke. It was so different from his toys; they had similar textures but nothing beat the real thing. Sora gave a little squeeze with his thumb and the flesh relented, a firm, spongey sort of squish.

“I have.”

“You’re awfully twitchy for someone with ‘experience’, Riku,” Sora said, a smug grin stretched across his cheeks. He placed his hand on the cock and slowly closed his fingers, reveling in the warmth of it and giving it a tender squeeze, watching it twitch again beneath his hand. “How long ago was your last relationship? Was it really that long for you?”

“No,” Riku said, licking his lips and trying to stop the quaking in his thighs, “My uhm, my last partner, uh...they didn't, uh—we weren't really intimate.”

“No? That's a shame,” Sora said, fist working in a light grind up Riku's cock. He'd never had to deal with piercings on his toys, and flesh had more give than silicone did. His fingers were warm, glued to the constant scrunch and taut of the skin as he worked his fingers up the pink length of it, experimenting. He could just make out a warped facsimile of his reflection in the barbells and he smiled. He was really going to do this. He was really going to just suck the life out of a man he could only dream about, huh?

And Riku, who just met him in the flesh weeks ago, was really going to let him.

Sora leaned down to give the tip an experimental kiss. It was silky to his lips and just as warm as the mass under his hand. He caught a jolt of muscle from Riku's thighs at the feeling and he couldn't help but laugh, a soft expulsion of air that grazed the pink skin. Sora was intimately acquainted with his toys. All the bumps and curves and tastes of them. Nothing could have prepared him for an actual penis only an inch away from his mouth.

He dipped his head down enough to find the base, the tender pinch of skin holding up those thick balls right there and he stuck out his tongue, licking a tender stripe from base to the underside of the head. The difference between soft-yet-hard flesh and hard from metal beneath his tongue was incredible, the bumps from the barbells just increasing his excitement. He had dildos with bumps on them, but they were somewhat squishy. These, though...

He started from the bottom again and licked a bit more eagerly, tongue pressing hard on the underside as he made it to the tip. His tongue tasted the sting of salt from Riku's skin, the somehow familiar taste of him. The scent. Heady and rich, it screamed masculine in his mind. What he got from the small tuft of silver-gray hair at the base, well-kept and trimmed, on top of the faded scent of soap was too much.

He licked a third time, just focusing on the tip, before tucking his hair behind his ears and popping it into his mouth, careful of his teeth. He heard an aborted noise above him but it did nothing more than encourage him, so he opened his jaw and sunk down to the first barbell. Before he had time to register what had happened, he heard a quiet gasp of his name and looked up to peer at Riku from the thickness of his eyelashes. What he saw was absolutely beautiful.

Silver hair framing a dusting of pink across those cheeks, that firm set of jawbones only more prominent. Riku was clenching his teeth. Cute. And those eyes, fierce and green, now almost blue from how wide his pupils had become, the salt-and-pepper eyelashes only more beautiful. Sora might've never had a sexual partner, but he knew sexual frustration when he saw it.

He smiled and sunk down further to the second barbell, the hardness on his tongue overwhelmingly hot. It was at this point he realized that, perhaps, he was literally biting off more than he could chew. Riku was big  _ everywhere _ . Thick, and long, and god, these piercings only added on to it. Sora frowned and pulled his mouth up slowly, the tip emerging from his pouty lips with an obscene, filthy pop.

“You look cozy,” Sora smiled, brushing bangs behind his ear again with a free hand, the other tightened around the dick in front of him, slicked with his saliva.

“You look too happy over this whole bet,” Riku shot back, reaching down to stroke at his tip above Sora’s hand. Sora hummed in approval and rubbed his thumb along the bottom-most barbell that remained dry. Not quite there yet. He knew he’d have to work a little harder to get it down his throat. It wasn’t too difficult at least from this standpoint; he’d taken larger toys into his throat, he thought. The barbells added additional girth in bad areas he’d have to work hard to tackle.

The hand on Riku’s cock removed itself to instead press into Sora’s hair, ruffling the strands lightly. “It  _ has  _ been a while but I can tell you this much: that felt really nice.”

“I’m glad,” Sora said, giving another tender few strokes, “But that doesn’t mean I’m done yet. Two thirds of the way isn’t  _ all  _ the way.” 

“I g- _ nnh!” _

Sora took the cock in his mouth again and pressed his tongue firmly to the underside. It made room for more of the flesh but it also stroked hard along that thick vein beneath, making Riku grunt and cover his mouth. Sora glanced up just enough to catch sight of that face and sighed blissfully at the view. Riku’s eyebrows were scrunched downwards, hand clasped tight to his lips. Riku was pale enough that even in the darkness, Sora could tell the male was  _ red.  _

Sora took a deep breath and started to suck hard, hollowing his cheeks and feeling the saliva pool in his mouth. He needed it soaked and it would take time and patience. He wanted to feel the itch of coarse hairs against his nose, he wanted to taste the tang of  _ real  _ cum for once. He didn’t want to just sit in an empty room, talking to himself and putting on a smile, playing with toys and going home to an empty place, to empty arms and promises. He was tired of being alone, was tired of pretending. He had so much love to give, and nobody gave him a chance to  _ give it. _

Sora swallowed around the cock and the resulting noise from Riku made his own dick twitch in his pajama bottoms. That moan was  _ deliciously  _ sweet. He wanted to hear it more. He coughed to clear his throat and pushed his head downwards, making the cock travel deeper into his throat, the barbells itching along his tongue. The dick felt heavy, and unlike his toys, it was firmer than he could anticipate. His toys had give to them, could squish and fold and mold to fit him. But a human’s penis was much more than he expected to the point that  _ he _ had to make room for  _ it.  _

He grunted, forcing more of it down. He could feel the third barbell and the graze of hairs tickling his nose tip but it wasn’t the same, it wasn’t enough. He was desperate to drink it down. The shivering of Riku beneath him only added on to that desperation. Sora’s heart was hammering in his chest and he felt sweat beading on his forehead. He was so close, he could do this. He could!

He pulled off the cock enough to take a breath and then shoved his head back down in eager bobs, inhaling as he pulled back, exhaling as he went forward. He had hoped if he continued to suck, he’d be able to bob down deep enough, that he’d be able to slick it up perfectly and that a good aimed thrust would bring that cock into his throat to the base. But the more he sucked, the more he realized that he was  _ stuck  _ and that it wouldn’t go any further. It nudged the back of his throat tantalizingly close but it was just that: close.

Sora was very obviously getting frustrated and worked harder for it, eyes closed. The tang of skin disappeared to the taste of something more bitter, and with a soft noise, he swallowed it down, pulling back from the head to see a clear bead of fluid pearling at the top. His tongue dipped within the slit and Riku cried out, nails scraping at the cushion fabric.

“Sora...”

With a moan, Sora took it back into his mouth and crammed it back deep, reworking up to that frustrating rhythm. The barbells went from interesting to annoying, the thick length went from impressive to an obstacle, and the bitter taste became maddening. What would it take to win this bet?

“Sora-!”

His cheeks hollowed and frustrated tears pricked at the corner of his eyes. Why wouldn’t the cock just bend a little and meet the curve of his throat? The piercings--once a source of his innate admiration and many kinky thoughts--were suddenly the thing he loathed the most. They kept the cock rigid. He heard nails scraping and saw the twitch of calves in his peripheral but he had to try harder, he was so close, he couldn’t lose this bet, he couldn’t lose any more viewers, he couldn’t let another donation pass him by. He had to do this! He couldn’t let his mother down. He couldn’t let  _ himself  _ down. He was better than this!

“Sora, stop!”

Sora forced his head down hard and felt his throat part wide as he gagged, and at the same instant, Riku jerked back, pulling himself from Sora’s mouth with a shout and stroking himself twice before he came, spurting across his stomach and panting hard. Riku brushed the bangs from his face and held himself firmly, fingers tingling as the release tapered off. Sora wiped his mouth and looked down at the floor, scrubbing at his eyes in a quick motion. Catching his breath, Riku reached down with his clean hand and pushed upwards at Sora’s jaw, forcing the brunette to lift his head. “Hey,” he whispered, “What happened?”

“I screwed up, that’s what.”

“No. No, you didn’t, you were  _ choking yourself _ , Sora.” He raised his hand to rub at Sora’s cheek, bringing a thumb up to wipe at a tear on the edge of Sora’s eyes. Sora brought his gaze up enough to see Riku’s. It was a mixture of a remnant of afterglow, pink and coming down from a blush, but he looked terrible. Looked  _ concerned.  _ Sora only had one chance and he messed it up, he could feel the failure resting like a stone in his belly. 

“I did my best, but-”

“Sora, you didn’t need to do  _ anything.  _ You were trying to hurt yourself over a bet, I would never ask you to cause yourself  _ harm.”  _ He leaned down to kiss Sora’s forehead and left his lips there, just keeping him steady while Sora’s shoulders shook. “Do you want to talk about it?” He felt the head beneath his mouth shake a little in a ‘no’. “Do you want me to repay the favor?” Another shake of a head, another tremble. “Okay,” he said, tucking himself back into his pajama bottoms. He pulled away enough to tear off his soiled shirt to the floor and moved down to the floor on his knees.

“Hey, it’s okay,” he said, draping his arms over Sora tightly in a hug. Strong hands slid up and down Sora’s quaking back but the brunette held back his tears. He was tired of crying in front of Riku, tired of showing him weakness. “It’s okay.”

Sora raised his hands up and gripped at Riku’s neck, fingers threading up into those silvery strands as he took in a long, shaky inhale. His heart was still pounding hard but with every slow breath he could feel it calming down. He needed to know if Riku was disappointed in him but he wasn’t sure he could muster the words to ask. Instead, he simply closed his eyes and relaxed into the embrace. His first day ever dating anybody and working up the courage to be intimate culminating into this.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize, you did nothing wrong.”

“I didn’t do anything  _ right,  _ either.”

Riku sighed. “That’s not true. Why are you so adamant in thinking you fucked up all the time?”

Sora gave a low, mirthless laugh, shaking his head and pulling away. “Because I feel like that’s all I do.”

It was Riku’s turn to sigh and he looked at Sora, frowning. “Everybody hates themself in some way. Everybody’s made mistakes and screwed up and realized they’re worth nothing. But you got to realize that that’s not how others see you. Others will always find the good in you. They’ll always be there to bring you up when you’re falling down. I need to to understand it’s okay to hate yourself--but that doesn’t mean anybody else hates you, too. You didn’t mess up tonight, you had me  _ worried.” _

“ _ You think I don’t know that _ ?!” Sora snapped, raising a hand to rub at his eyes again. “I can’t fail! I can’t let this stream die, it’s all I have--you’re all I have--and I can’t have my mom keep living there. I can’t keep losing subscribers and donations, I’m so sick of trying my best and it just blows up in my face. I-I’m just so  _ tired  _ and I don’t know what to do.” He fought hard to compose himself but he felt the tremors returning and couldn’t be sure if the tightness in his throat was from the previous ministrations or a lump currently forming.

“You won’t,” Riku said. “You won’t fail; I’m here to help you, whatever it takes. And...if you need me to collaborate then I will. I can put some money away from every paycheck, I can sell some things, and if it doesn’t work out then I can ask my friends for some help. Kairi could probably hire you on and if not, Elrena knows some people that need help. We can get the money figured out.” He raised a hand rub at a fresh tear forming on Sora’s face and then worked up a gentle smile. “Getting you to see yourself the way I do is going to take some time, though. Thankfully, time is all I have.”

Sora looked up and a flash of surprise grazed his face. “What?”

“Let’s just wind down for the night, okay? Get you feeling better, and come the morning, we can figure it all out. Sounds good?”

“...yeah,” Sora agreed with a nod and a sniffle, “Sounds good.”

“Alright, lemme go change into something, uh, dry. You can pick out a movie and a snack.”

Sora nodded again and rubbed at his eyes, standing up tall and feeling the relief from his knees. Riku followed suit, picking up his shirt and placing his clean hand back on Sora’s head. “For what it’s worth, Sora? All that toy practice was incredible.” Blunt nails scratched Sora’s head before stepping away, Riku heading into the kitchen to put his shirt in the washer, slipping into the bedroom for something fresher. 

Sora busied himself by running his fingers over the DVDs, reading the titles and tasting his tongue. He could still taste the bitter flavor on his tongue, the weight of barbells impressively solid. He’d do better next time. For now, he slipped out a DVD and popped it into the player, turning off the stereo and changing the TV channel. He got comfortable on the couch and tugged over a blanket. The familiar loud ads began to play and he fished around trying to find the remote in time for Riku to come back with a fresh white shirt and Sora’s phone in hand.

“Here,” he said, “It was going off.”

“Oh, thanks,” Sora replied, taking it and swiping in his password to check a text message. Riku got comfortable on the couch beside him and watched as Sora’s eyebrows scrunched and then raised.

“What’s up?”

“Nothing,” Sora said, “Just my brother. He said something happened, he’s going to be in town and wants to see me in a few days.”

“You said he traveled a lot, right? Go spend some time with him when he shows up, I’m sure you could both use it.” Sora nodded and looked over at Riku questioningly, who all but opened his arms and slid down so he was lying. Sora clambered over and rested on Riku’s left side, placing his head over his chest. The movie’s opening began and Sora sighed out in relaxation, putting a hand over Riku’s pec. He felt more than heard a laugh above him, blunt nails scratching along Sora’s scalp.

“Roxas is gonna kill you, isn’t he?”

Riku nodded. “Probably. He doesn’t have to know.”

“I don’t like keeping secrets from friends but I don’t want you to get in trouble, either.” The music from the movie swelled and the first song began, Sora’s fingers drumming along Riku’s chest to the beat. “Did you mean what you said about helping?”

“Of course I did. We’ll have to be really sneaky about the stream, though. Maybe...a mask, or a voice editor? As long as my face isn’t visible it should be fine, but...one condition.”

“What’s that?”

“...I need to hide my scar. Roxas has seen it, he’ll know it’s me. If I’m on a side profile angle, it shouldn’t be visible. I could, I dunno, use a pillow as a cover or something. Wear a shirt, but…”

“I want people to see your body, Riku. It’s really nice.”

Riku snorted and ruffled Sora’s head before smoothing it down and going back to gently scratching again. “Whatever you say, little prince.”


End file.
